- My doctor told me I need to eat more meat.
Get ready to laugh
because today we are reacting to,
what I am told,
are memes that only girls will understand.
- Well, that's what I heard.
- And here with the female perspective on this,
is my wife Jenn.
- Yep.
This should be interesting,
but I don't know what we're in store for.
- Oh my gosh.
Let's dive right in.
I accidentally sneezed.
I mean, I get that.
- Wait, what?
- I understand. I'm a doctor.
- I would argue
that every female watching this
has been there.
- That's a lot of blood.
- Yeah, a lot of blood comes out sometimes.
- Girls after quarantine.
Boys after quarantine.
What?
Come on!
- What are they insinuating at?
- Oh, wait a minute.
I wasn't even getting the guy.
I thought the guy was just jacked in general.
- Very poor choice of words.
- [Jordan] But it's just his one arm.
- It is one way to get through isolation,
I suppose.
- Self-care.
- Sure.
(Jordan laughs)
- My girlfriend's circulatory system is failing.
- I get this.
- I mean, is that like
when you put a hair tie thing on your wrist?
- Yes.
There's definitely a period of your life
where you don't leave home without a hair tie,
because you just never know
what's gonna happen in your day.
Also, if you're frustrated,
just like take out some frustration.
- It's a safe and non-dangerous
and non-permanent injury.
- Yeah.
- When you pee
and spread your legs apart too far.
- Oh, God.
- What happens when you
spread your legs apart too far?
(Jenn laughs)
- He's acting it out.
You can't see it under the table.
But he's acting it out!
I don't totally get this one.
If you've ever been out in the wild
where you had to pee in nature,
that is so awkward for a chick.
I mean, guys have it so easy.
- When I asked the doctor
why my stomach hurts.
It's hot Cheeto's.
- I lived on these for a period of time.
I'm not joking.
- I've never eaten a hot Cheeto. Ever.
- What?
- [Jordan] Doing ultrasound on the abdomen here
on the left side.
You probably wouldn't see that anyway.
- Isn't the stomach like way higher-?
- Yeah, it's like literally underneath
the sternum,
just kind of sitting right under there.
Girls boobs be like,
left side,
right side.
Big and small.
Two different sizes.
- Definitely two different sizes.
There's always one bigger and smaller.
- Big one, small one.
Some as big as your head.
- I think left is mine.
Is that common?
- I don't know if the one side versus the other,
it's just like testicles
where like one hangs below the other.
- Well, I would think
because your heart's on the left side
so there's more blood in that area.
- It's a very good theory.
Cramps aren't that bad?
Neither is a punch to the dick.
(Jordan and Jenn laughing)
I don't think the male persuasion
understands the intensity
of the uterus contracting,
causing menstrual cramps.
- I'm sure being punched
in the nether region for a dude
is painful in its own right.
Cramps can be light
and then it can be like,
"Oh, you're grocery shopping,"
and then man down!
- [Jordan] Just drop to the ground.
- [Jenn] Yeah.
- I think it's time to kick you in the nuts
and see which is worse!
- For me just in general,
if I work out throughout the month
I tend to have less pain
when it's that time in the month.
- Is it equivalent to when you
have a bad muscle cramp from say,
working out too much
and it's really fatigued,
and then every time you
try to like do something
it like spasms up again?
- It can feel like that.
- Because I wonder if it's the same idea.
Is that it's working so hard
and then you're back to normal
during the other three weeks.
Someone with breast implants
after their corpse decomposes.
- Oh yeah.
- [Jordan] Interesting.
I don't think they do studies about this.
- They do.
And I'm gonna tell you.
Well, I don't know about studies.
- Not in like a casket.
I guess they do studies of people decomposing.
- I know a crazy story.
There was a guy
who killed his girlfriend.
The breast implants had a serial number,
and they were still intact.
- My doctor told me I need to eat more meat.
Saw butcher was messing around that day.
- Oh my gosh.
- Well, I feel uncomfortable,
only because it looks like
balls and a penis.
I mean, what kind of meat is it?
- I was wondering
what kind of meat it was as well.
I was like, is that like, shoulder-?
- Is it a piece of like, filet?
Like a nice tube?
- I'm not gonna lie,
but sometimes I buy kielbasa sausage.
- Kielbasa sausage.
- I mean, it's a good price.
It's only 15 bucks.
How I feel after I shaved everything,
and moisturized myself
and washed my hair.
Nice!
- Nothing feels better
than after you shave your legs,
and everything's all smooth like silk,
and you're all moisturized.
You're like, "I better have plans today
because tomorrow I'm gonna be prickly as a pear,
and it is not gonna be cute."
- Best feeling in the world.
- Amen. Hallelujah.
Whoo!
Just slingshot it.
(Jenn laughing)
- That's funny.
- I'm like Houdini,
I can get out of that thing
with one finger, one hand.
(Jenn laughs)
- I'm like,
"Baby, you need help?"
Trying to figure this out
like it's a Rubik's cube.
My mental illness acting up at 3:00 AM.
- It is me, your mental illness.
- Yeah, I'm Marge.
- Yeah, I was gonna say this is opposite.
- Jenn just falls asleep well,
but wakes up in the middle of the night
and then she's awake.
- Who else struggles from anxiety?
It's really fun when your brain's like,
"We're good, we're tired,
we're gonna go to bed early tonight."
And then it's like 2:00 AM.
"Waa!"
- I wear the aura ring,
and it tells me like,
"You fell asleep in 34 seconds."
- Actually, what has helped me lately,
just focusing on the meditation mantra.
- That way you're not just perseverating
on all these things,
all these tasks that you have to do,
or worrying about things,
you're like "zhook!"
Narrow it down.
- [Jenn] Yeah.
- [Jordan] If she's sick,
she needs more Vitamin D.
(Jordan gasps)
I dunno how to take this.
Go outside.
Get some sunshine.
- Yes, I mean, that's important as well.
- That's vitamin D.
- I don't think that's what old Willie here
is talking about.
- I need my vitamin D.
- Vitamins are helpful.
They're supplements in the sense of like,
you should be getting it from your diet.
And then you wanna hydrate well,
maybe some chicken soup.
Good news, you're not pregnant.
Bad news,
you're gonna feel like you're giving birth.
Now I have this conversation almost daily
with an individual,
in the sense that people come in,
vaginal bleeding, question,
pregnancy, not pregnancy.
Are you having a miscarriage or you're not?
Did you wanna get pregnant and you're not?
So many different things,
and it's hard to have that conversation.
- So you've had to tell people,
like they come in for a cough
and you're like-
- You're pregnant.
- Ooh.
- Depends if I read the room right
I will actually be like, "Congratulations?"
- When your mom kisses your booboo.
- Oh, when your mom kisses your booboo.
- [Jenn] Yes.
- Got it.
- I feel like this is not just female oriented.
I feel like this is for everybody.
- When a parent brings a child to the hospital,
the patient, aka the child,
is going to lose their mind.
Mom kisses a booboo,
gets better, kid's fine,
no problem.
Even if it's broken,
kid feels much better.
- A good hug,
that's healing.
- Oh, this is nice.
- [Jenn] Unless you're really in pain in that moment.
But, well, your significant other.
- [Audience] Aww.
- Like, just care,
and love and emotion.
Doesn't wear a pad.
Wears pad.
(Jordan and Jenn laughs)
- I mean, it's like the rain, right?
You bring an umbrella along,
surely it's not gonna rain.
Similar situation for the female variety.
- Dizziness-slash-vaginal bleeding.
ER doctors.
- Maybe they come in with ambiguous symptoms,
and you are trying to put the pieces together
of what may be the cause.
- [Jordan] Usually if you're vaginal bleeding,
you're gonna be lightheaded,
might feel a little dizzy,
you might feel like you're gonna pass out
'cause you lost some blood,
but you're also making red blood cells,
and you do this every month.
Typically, we'll just let somebody relax,
check your numbers,
make sure you're okay.
Sometimes just giving some oral hydration
or even IV fluid,
filling up the intravascular space
will make somebody feel better.
This was hilarious
memes that I wouldn't understand,
but as a physician I understand them.
- I think it's good to discuss these things,
and it's hilarious.
Some of these are real funny
and very relatable,
and some are a little wackadoodle.
- Check out this playlist right here.
And as always, make sure you subscribed,
turn your...
- Bell notifications on.
- And hit that like button for us.
Thank you so much for watching,
and stay healthy, my friends.
- Bye.