I have a confession to make I have saved
every single video project from the time
I began my freelance filmmaking career
over ten years ago it amounts to over 45
hard drives and well over 100 terabytes
of video content it's true I'm a digital
hoarder
there were no contracts that bound me to
this footage and I never made any kind
of commitment to my clients that I'd
hold onto this stuff for any length of
time it really started because as a
freelancer I didn't know if I'd need to
reference those files in the future or
not instead of throwing them away or
wiping the content of the drives I
collected and stored them in my closet
this went on for years so I held on to
them just in case I needed to access
them later on and every once in a while
that was true but for the most part they
just sat there by themselves in my
closet completely untouched and then
something happened I stopped doing
freelance work completely and I started
my youtube channel but for some reason I
just couldn't part with those drives
years after filming my last wedding
after working on local television
commercials and Bar Mitzvah intro videos
I still kept these drives stored away in
my closet I rarely ever even looked at
them but I had this strange emotional
connection to those dust-covered pieces
of plastic and metal it was more than
just ones and zeros they represented a
decade worth of hard work commitment
doubt and triumph anyone who has ever
started a business or dedicated
themselves to their passion will
understand every email every pitch every
round of revision every big win and
painful loss sits on those drives
forgive me as I do my best version of
Carl Sagan's pale blue dot but there was
just something about these drives that I
was attached to I couldn't get rid of
them all that work looking at them
understanding what it took to fill each
and every single one of those drives I
just couldn't let go and also deep down
inside I thought that maybe one day I'd
actually need them and then just this
morning an old client sent me an email
asking me if I happen to have a project
from 2014 he told me that the company's
YouTube channel had recently been
deleted and no one was able to save the
file this was the moment I've been
waiting for for the past 10 years all
those years of hoarding my drives and
they were finally going to be put to use
I approached the closet looking for the
drive in question catalyst a5 when I
found the drive and pulled it out my
heart sank
these drives were connected via an
outdated firewire 800 cable and old USB
connections so I frantically searched
through my cable drawer nothing and then
I pulled down my cable bin it's true I'm
a cable hoarder as well and after going
through every last cable and wire I
miraculously found the right combination
that I needed to connect it to my
current laptop
I powered up the drive my fingers
crossed and it worked I browse through
my client folders and I was able to
recover the file he was looking for I
was probably looking for a distraction
this morning when I got that email and
when I decided to go on this hunt for
both the right cable and the right hard
drive to find the right project for the
right old client but there was something
about being able to be of service and
help to somebody to be able to be the
only person in the world to solve this
one very minut and trivial problem it
felt really good it felt good
- hopefully brighten somebody else's day
but also to lift my own while I had this
hard drive open I got a little bit
distracted and started to look back at
some of those early projects it gave me
an opportunity to reminisce and reflect
about those early days the days when I
was just getting started out and really
didn't know where this was all going to
lead and it put a lot of things in
perspective looking back at those old
projects reminded me of two really
important things that have helped me to
get to the place where I am now in both
my life and my career first put
everything you have into everything you
do when I look back at some of those
early projects it's amazing to me the
amount of time and energy that I spent
working on some of those early projects
it didn't matter to me if my audience
was two people or two million people I
always wanted to make the best possible
video or best possible project I could
and it didn't matter who was watching it
I just wanted to be able to deliver and
a lot of that came from the fact that I
was truly passionate and truly dedicated
to wanting to improve as a filmmaker and
so having that kind of attitude not
feeling like I was ever too good for
anything or too good to work with
anybody really helped me to progress to
grow and learn early on when I really
didn't have that many opportunities and
I didn't really know where my career was
gonna go and the second thing that it
reminded me of is actually a
counterpoint to the point that I just
made and it's don't take yourself so
damn seriously all the time now that I
have some distance from these projects
some of them eight to ten years distance
I realized that I was probably
Tsing anxious frustrated I took myself
way too seriously back in those days
obviously there's a point there's a
point to where that seriousness allowed
me to do the best version of those
videos as I possibly could but I was far
too hard on myself in those early days
and sometimes the only thing that I
really needed and the only thing that I
wish that I had given to myself was a
break these moments are temporary the
failures the mistakes the
miscommunications and mishaps they're
all very finite they end and eventually
people move on and it's okay to screw up
it's okay to fail and it's okay to
really be uncertain about where you're
going to go as long as you continue to
show up and try your best and so
understanding that perspective
understanding that in a few years time
I'm gonna be thinking that same way
about my current version of myself
realizing that I really should be giving
myself a break with all of these
projects that I work on today has really
helped to put things in perspective for
me and I do want to mention that I
realize that I'm not actually a hoarder
I don't think it's a bad thing that I
hold on to these hard drives of course I
constantly ask that question as I
practice minimalism eight to ten years
now from when I first got into it does
this thing had value to my life is this
something that I'm truly using and will
continue to use and if not you can let
go but then there's always gonna be
those things that are kind of in the
middle ground whether it's a sentimental
item or it's something that you just
truly don't want to part with right now
even though you don't find use in it
that is absolutely completely okay so I
might not touch any of these hard drives
for another ten years but if that's what
it takes to come through for my clients
that
what I'm willing to do alright Who am I
kidding I'm doing this for me because in
life there are some things that are
worth holding on do you know before I
wrap this video up I do have to actually
make one thing very clear because I know
it's gonna be it's gonna be all over the
comments down the bottom the tattoos on
my arm right here
they're pretty dope right that ones are
gonna make it mermaid it's really cool
and that's a taco and that's a pizza and
they're fake Natalie and I got really
bored so we bought some fake tattoos and
actually I'm not gonna lie like legit I
like it I'm into the look I might
actually get some real tattoos