SO THE SPEECH WAS A DISASTER -- A DISASTER!
BUT TODAY TRUMP GOT A DO-OVER IN TELEVISED MEETING WITH IRISH
LEADER LEO VARADKAR -- VARADKAR!
BOW BEFORE VARADKAR!
I'LL TELL YOU ALL ABOUT IT IN TONIGHT'S EPISODE OF "CHAIR
CHAT"!
TRUMP STARTED BY EXPLAINING THAT DUE TO VIRAL CONCERNS HE AND LEO
VARADKAR DIDN'T SHAKE HANDS.
>> WE DIDN'T SHAKE HANDS TODAY AND WE LOOKED AT EACH OTHER, WE
SAID, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?
YOU KNOW, SORT OF A WEIRD FEELING.
WE SAID IT AT THE SAME TIME.
WE DID THIS.
YOU KNOW, I JUST GOT BACK FROM INDIA, AND I DIDN'T SHAKE ANY
HANDS THERE, AND IT WAS VERY EASY BECAUSE THEY GO LIKE THIS,
AND JAPAN GOES LIKE THIS.
THEY WERE AHEAD OF THE CURVE.
>> Stephen: IT'S STRANGE, BOWING LIKE THAT IN INDIA OR
JAPAN IS THE RESPECTFUL THING TO DO BUT SEEMS LIKE WHEN TRUMP
DOES IT, IT'S A HATE CRIME.
( LAUGHTER ) TRUMP CONTINUED TO INSIST HE
COULD NEVER HAVE SEEN THIS THING WHAT EVERYBODY SAW COMING
COMING.
>> WHAT WE DID IN EUROPE, THIS WAS THE TIME.
CHINA, A LOT OF IT CAME FROM WHEN YOU -- WHEN YOU THINK OF
WHAT HAPPENED TO EUROPE BECAUSE IT WAS VERY FAST AND VERY
FURIOUS -- >> Stephen: IT WAS FAST, AND
FURIOUS, SOME MIGHT EVEN SAY TOO FAST, TOO FURIOUS.
IT -- STARTED IN ASIA BUT THEN, OF COURSE, WE ALL SAW THE TOKYO
DRIFT.
DO -- DO WE KNOW THE FATE TO HAVE THE FURIOUS?
DO WE KNOW THAT YET?
THE FATE OF THE FURIOUS?
NO, BUT WE DO KNOW, AS VIN DIESEL SAYS, IT'S ALL ABOUT
FAMILY.
( LAUGHTER ) HOBBS AND SHAW.
( LAUGHTER ) ( PIANO RIFF )
NEVER SEEN ONE OF THOSE MOVIES.
I SHOULD SEE ALL OF THEM.
I WANT TO SEE ALL OF THOSE MOVIES.
>> Jon: MM-HMM.
(INAUDIBLE).
>> Stephen: I WANT TO SEE ALL OF THOSE MOVIES, BECAUSE I THINK
TO TRULY UNDERSTAND THIS COUNTRY THAT I LOVE, I NEED TO SEE THE
MOST SUCCESSFUL DECOLOGY EVER MADE.
NINE WILL BE THE TENTH?
BECAUSE EIGHT WAS ACTUALLY THE NINTH BECAUSE HOBBS AND SHAW IS
CANON?
DON'T FIGHT, JUST GIVE ME AN ANSWER.
IS HOBBS AND SHAW CANON?
>> YES.
>> Stephen: SO THAT'S THE NINTH.
SO THE EIGHTH IS THE NINTH.
THE NINTH IS THE TENTH.
BUT HERE'S WHAT I'M SAY -- AND GIVE ME A SHOT AT CHRIS.
GIVE ME A SHOT AT CHRIS RIGHT NOW, ( BLEEP ) D DAMN IT!
YOU'RE A CAMERAMAN!
HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT DOESN'T HELP!
>> Jon: AAAHHH!
( PIANO RIFF ) >> Stephen: I AM TELLING YOU,
WHAT IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW IS THE FUTURE OF THIS TELEVISION
SHOW!
YOU THINK I'M NOT LEAVING IN HALF AN HOUR, YOU'RE CRAZY!
I'M RATHER ENJOYING THIS RIGHT NOW.
ARE YOU HAVING A GOOD TIME?
>> YES.
>> Stephen: OKAY.
HAVE YOU HAD ANY OF THIS?
( LAUGHTER ) BECAUSE I HAVE, AND I'VE GOT TO
TELL YA, I FEEL LIKE A CHILD AGAIN.
( PIANO RIFF ) MAKING MUD PIES, MAN, ANYTHING'S
POSSIBLE.
>> Jon: YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.
38 MINUTES.
>> Stephen: 38 MINUTES?
WE'VE ALMOST GOT A FULL SHOW RIGHT HERE.
TOM!
>> YEAH!
>> Stephen: WHAT DO YOU THINK?
ANYTHING HERE?
CAN YOU USE ANY OF THIS?
>> I CAN USE SOME OF IT, SURE!
>> Stephen: WE'VE GOT 38 MINUTES!
>> NOT 38 MINUTES-WORTH.
>> Stephen: NO, HOW MUCH DO WE NEED OF THE 38 MINUTES THAT I'VE
TALKED SO FAR, HOW MUCH DO WE NEED?
>> 14.
>> Stephen: WE'VE GOT 14 MINUTES!
COME ON, THERE'S 14 MINUTES HERE!
HOW MUCH ARE WE BURNING NOW?
THIS HAS TO BE A FULL MINUTE OF ME ASKING YOU THIS.
>> IT'S GOING TO BE CUT.
( LAUGHTER ) ( PIANO RIFF )
>> Stephen: TOM PURCEL AND CHRIS, EVERYBODY!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( PIANO RIFF )
WHOO -- WHOO!
IT'S A GOOD THING TRUMP SEEMS SO UNWORRIED ABOUT CORONAVIRUS
BECAUSE A SENIOR BRAZILIAN GOVERNMENT OFFICIAL WHO VISITED
MAR-A-LAGO DAYS AGO AND WAS IN CLOSE PROXIMITY TO DONALD TRUMP
AND MIKE PENCE HAS TESTED POSITIVE FOR CORONAVIRUS.
THE WHITE HOUSE SAYS TRUMP AND PENCE HAD ALMOST NO INTERACTIONS
WITH THE BRAZILIAN SECRETARY WHO TESTED POSITIVE FOR CORONAVIRUS
AFTER HIS MAR-A-LAGO VISIT AND DO NOT REQUIRE TO BE TESTED AT
THIS TIME.
A BIG DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ALMOST NO INTERSECTIONS AND
INTERSECTIONS.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE'S PREGNANT?
I HAD ALMOST NO SEX WITH HER!
( LAUGHTER ) WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH
DR. SANJAY GUPTA!