hey ghouls are you ready to make some
witch fingers which fingers am I talking
about
[Music]
all right we'll start out with about
four ounces of pig's lard if you can't
get pigs lard you may use regular butter
I hear that's what humans use we'll
start by creaming this butter or pig
flarg just like this Joe you will sift
in some powdered dog bones if you don't
have powdered dog bones you can use some
powdered sugar some people think it
tastes better not me but do how you like
how did dog bones do have a lot of
calcium if you can get them it's worth
the shop cream this together once again
Jim this reminds me of play days at the
raves we'll add one egg I'm using a
chicken egg you can find a snake egg
that's fantastic
use a snake egg you may need to use two
snake eggs unless it is a large snake
such as a cobra or a Python you'll know
it's ready when it looks like pus
now we'll add some flour this is just
regular plain flour gotcha touch of salt
witches love salt finally if you can get
I of Newt use that if not a touch of
vanilla will do just fine mix again oh
now we've got our dough if you have room
in your refrigerator
move aside those severed heads pop this
in there for about 30 minutes
now it's chilled to the bone and you'll
want to get a little collection of some
chicken bones for this recipe sorry I
should have mentioned that earlier if
you don't have chicken bones these
pretzel sticks but chicken bones are
really what I grew up with and it's what
I prefer I'll use pretzel sticks today
you get a little bit of dough this is
then the pretzel is it really doesn't
make a very realistic finger if you
never had the pleasure fighting into a
fresh child's finger this is a pretty
good substitute and you just want to
wrap a bit of the dough around your
pretzel bone
speaking of bones you could also make
penises out of this I've seen the
devil's penis it's bigger than you might
expect that's about the size of my
finger when you say well ladies on a
baking sheet if you do ever meet the
devil and they asked you to jerk him off
this is what he likes
[Music]
now make them extra realistic we'll take
your two fingers and give them two
pinches for your knuckles for my
knuckles rather take a small knife make
some wrinkles did you say that I have
wrinkly hands I'll curse you
[Music]
finally you'll want to get some
fingernails I've got mine right here I'm
just gonna pull that off it's fine it's
fine and then you just want to stick it
right in the cookie
if you prefer you can use a slivered
almonds these look pretty great this
look actually very realistic when I
don't have my nails freshly manicured
this is what they look like a little bit
brown a little bit pointy now it's time
to bake all done now you just want to
cut your finger a little bit if you can
and you just squeeze it just squeeze it
until that blood just comes out it feels
so good yes all right our cookies are
ready
you want to let them cool a little bit
when you just want to dip those just dip
it right into that blood if you have
some period blood that's fine too mmm
little crunch mm-hmm
closest thing to a real finger you're
ever gonna get unless you eat a real
finger which I have
[Music]
mmm I hope you make these happy
Halloween