- You read the paper, right?
- (pretends to gag)
- We're not gagging that's for sure.
- Just 'cause I don't know what to do anymore at the start.
- Don't do that.
Do you know why we're here today?
(pretends to gag)
(upbeat music)
- (indistinct) That's kind of more like.
- (laughs) What is that?
- I don't know. (indistinct)
- Irish (indistinct)
- Wait a minute, are we getting like a whiskey donut?
- Oh, no, no, these don't have alcohol in them.
- 'Cause that would be a real Irish donut
if it had whiskey in them.
- Or Guinness.
- Irish donuts are just big, like,
blobs of bread with a bit of jam in the middle.
They make you feel sick after one.
- Yeah!
(upbeat electronic music)
- My God, it's the size of my head.
- What is this?
- Look at it.
It's a slab
- Look at that.
- Look at this bad boy.
- Well, you could sleep on that.
- So light.
I was expecting it to be like a big, heavy dense.
Yeah.
- Look. It looks like me trapped in the freezer
for over two years.
- The regular standard donut,
possibly compared to other pairs,
their doughnut may be glazed
and this one may be covered in sugar,
that may or may not be due to the supply
that was available at the time.
- We'll put our own hole in there.
- Oh my God.
Yes.
- Yeah. Let's just go right in.
- Let's just dig right in.
It's so light.
- Yep.
- It's good.
- That's a doughnut.
- It's literally sugary bread.
- Simple up but effective, you know, does a job.
- Very dry.
- Like it needs something to wash that down.
Completely, like a cup of tea or a pint or something.
- That's what it is, an Irish donut.
- Like I took one bite there and I'm automatically full.
- It's lovely.
Absolutely beautiful.
- Very messy.
- Imagine being in a pub
and having a pint Guinness and a doughnut now.
- Really portrays an Irish person.
Doesn't it?
We're simple.
We're not over the top.
- If someone asked this, was it a doughnut?
They'd be like, yeah, I'm a doughnut.
Yeah, it's a doughnut.
- Very tasty.
Very good.
Could have done with something inside it.
Couldn't we all
- A six out of 10.
- Five.
- Oh yeah.
Okay.
- I'm not gonna.
Yeah, that's fine.
- Yeah. That's okay.
Well maybe I'll give it a four then.
- I Think things are gonna get a lot more exotic.
- This is like a gateway donut.
- Yeah.
- She's been stabbed.
- Jam!
- Look at that.
- Whereas the last donut didn't have anything.
This donut has everything.
- Well, hello there, is my boob sticking out?
- Oh yeah, there she goes.
- Oh my God.
- Where they put the jam is always hidden.
Maybe in the side or whatever.
And here it's like, no.
We put jam in the donut and we want you to know.
- We're probably gonna have to eat
for a while to get to the middle part.
- You put a whole jar in this.
Oh, my word.
- Sounds like proper, like real strawberry jam.
It's delicious.
Sorry, but they have loaded that full of jam.
That is intense.
- Yeah. You could make sandwiches
for the whole family with all that.
- No.
- Oh no.
- New profile picture.
- Oh.
- It's intense?
- Oh.
That's the most intense jam I've ever jammed.
- Bob Marley would approve.
- The way you're looking at that.
- What?
- Oh no. I've seen things.
- I've never seen so much jam and a donut
in my life and it's tasty expensive jam as well.
It's not like crap.
- Because sometimes it's like a jelly.
This is proper.
Like I can see the fruit there.
- You spread this in there.
- It looks so rough.
I don't wanna get on my fingers.
- That's really up there.
They've really kicked it up a notch.
- So much better.
- Yeah. Looks terrible.
Tastes amazing.
- I don't like it.
It's too jammy.
It's like they didn't push sugar in it or something.
It's like, so really sour strawberries.
Wait, they're not strawberries.
Aren't they now?
- Sorry. I thought...
- What do you think, Sean?
- I got very excited there for a minute
and ate the whole lot of it.
- I'm starting to get full already.
- I know, we can do this.
I believe in us.
- Ooh. We can power through.
- God. This is art.
- The decadence.
- What?
I've never seen one of these before.
- It's like one of those coffee slices.
- Yeah.
- God, there's so much jam stuck in my beards.
- Look at this bad boy.
- This is only for the visitors.
That's only coming out.
The president.
They'd only take that out if the president was the visitor.
- This is the special doughnut.
- Like latte art.
Very aesthetically pleasing.
- Miss and wanting though.
- A hole?
- You're dead right?.
- No, I'm not doing it.
I'm just not doing.
- You don't have to.
- Go for it.
- Yeah, absolutely.
- So much bread.
- I can feel the, the weight of whatever
is in the bottom.
- What the hell?
It's like coffee.
- Tiramisu.
- Look. That's why you had stuff in your finger.
- I think it's Kinder Bueno.
- It's very hazelnutty.
- It is coffee as well.
- Yeah.
- [Interviewer] It is Kinder Bueno.
- As soon as I looked at it, I went Kinder Bueno.
But then I smelled it and I was like coffee.
But then you said caramel and I was like,
that could be it as well.
- This is incredible.
- So good.
- This is the one I would order,
out of all the donuts we tried.
This is the one
- Kinder Bueno.
- Oh.
- [Interviewer] It's all over your table.
- Just shat itself.
- My donut got a bit excited.
- It's so lovely and delicious.
I'm so sorry.
The way I have completely mistreated this doughnut.
- I go so far as to order three of them,
just bite the middle down, and throw
the rest away.
- It's like a fake Kinder Bueno
trying to show you a fake ID.
And you're like, I'm just not buying it.
- You're like, I don't believe a word of this.
- I just really don't understand, this doesn't taste
like Kinder Bueno though.
Taste it.
I'm not crazy.
There's coffee in there.
The jam was like a crime scene.
The first one was a little bit too dry.
This one, perfection.
- There's more bread than I thought.
I'd like it to be a bit more wet or something.
It was a bit dry.
- Oh, so much bread.
- I'm not happy.
Because I really like Kinder Bueno
and there's too much coffee in that..
- They've sold a lie here.
- They've sold us a lie and called it a dream.
(upbeat music)
- This is the same one coming back, trying to fool us.
- It's a yogurt.
- That's a different type of nipple now.
- It's so unappetizing, seeing a big dirty hole
in the middle of it.
- [Interviewer] It's an artisanal hole.
- Artisanal hole.
Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the main stage.
- This looks like someone got the last one and the jam one
and went (laughs).
- It kind of taste like perfume.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- This is yogurt.
- Is it like cheesecake or...
- Why did somebody put (indistinct) in my doughnut?
- Oh, I'm optimistic.
But like straw, strawberries and cream.
That's a thing
- That could be great.
- Let's go for it.
- It's all over my face.
- What was that face?
- There's a bit of jam in there, for a fun time as well.
- Oh, for the jam.
- Is this strawberry cheese cake?
- [Interviewer] It's Strawberry Bailey's.
- Oh wow.
Okay.
- I didn't really like it.
I didn't taste any Baileys.
Like usually I can know it's Bailey's from a mile away.
Cause I'm like Bailey's.
- That is vile.
That's absolutely vile.
I wasn't a big Bailey's fan anyway, but dear Jesus.
That's the worst form I've ever had.
- It's dripping. Dripping.
- She's leaking.
- It had a prolapse.
- I mean, we couldn't finish this doughnut shoot here today
without a bit of alcohol thrown in something.
Do you know what I mean?
- It's like someone got...
- Soup? That's suncream.
- This is my favorite one so far.
I know I played with it for far too long
but this is my favorite one.
- This is my least favorite.
It doesn't taste like Bailey's, it tastes like yogurt.
- It's really bad.
- It's awful.
- It's not nice at all.
- That's awful. How did this happen?
- Controversial opinion.
I could probably have done without the icing on it.
I think the filling could have like really
just shone through.
- [Interviewer] A step down from the Kinder Bueno?
- A big step down, I'd say.
A fucking staircase down.
- One time I did the splits down the staircase before.
- Did you?
- Oh not on purpose.
I just missed the step in my high heel.
Just went (imitates something falling)
- I think this is better than the Kinder Bueno,
'cause it's not as heavy.
It's a little bit lighter.
Little bit more palate cleansing.
- I'd put that in lockdown.
- That doesn't deserve to be out in public at all.
- That's a two outta ten.
- Did you have get an ambulance?
- Oh no. Geez. I just got back up.
I get knocked down, I get up again.
You know, you're never gonna keep me down.
(upbeat music)
- We have a long boy here today.
- Like a log or...
- Like a hot dog.
- With some baby poo on top.
- Yeah. That's not the most appealing looking.
- Oh God don't open it.
- Oh really?
- Banana! It's banoffee. (claps)
It's banoffee.
It does terrible things to me.
I freak out a little.
- Hello. What's the hurry?
- Eat me.
- I wonder what will happen to us today.
- Things can only look up from here.
- Things can only get better.
- This is banoffee.
- Oh, okay.
- I'm not a big fan of banana in general.
- Oh.
- It tastes like baby food on a hot dog bun.
- That's incredible.
- Oh my God.
And you can see the it's like proper mash banana
with a circle topping.
- No, I really don't like this.
- Not for me at all.
- If you ate five of these a day,
That'll be your five fruit and veg.
- And five steps closer towards your cholesterol.
- This one tastes a little bit too much like
you know those overly ripe bananas that you mush.
- Yeah.
- (sings) No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
This is the kind of thing that I'm glad,
I can have in lockdown,
'cause I don't wanna share it with anyone.
I lose friends over this,
cause I'm like, hell no, this is mine.
- This is like two, it gets points 'cause it is a doughnut.
That's about it.
- This one kind of, you know,
brings us back down to reality of Irish doughnuts.
- Your issue with the number one was that it was too plain.
Is this better or worse than the one that's too plain.
- It's too sweet.
- Mine's too banoffee, 'cause I just don't like it.
- I'd lose friends over this, because I'm not sharing it.
- No, no, no, no.
- And it was worth it.
Yeah. I'm happy to live alone.
(upbeat music)
- Bacon.
- Bacon on a doughnut?
- Okay. Okay.
- Right. Okay.
I'm on board.
I like bacon.
- This is like maple bacon. Something something.
- My bacon seems to be way more yellow than yours.
- I feel like they went down the American road for this one.
Cause it has bacon on it.
- Bacon.
- I have in America seen maple bacon donuts
and I'm kind of on board with that.
- Bacon works with everything.
Sweet, savoury, whatever.
- Is it heavy?
- Kind of heavy
- (sings "The Final Countdown")
- Good bacon?
- It's fine.
You'd get it in a deli.
- 1, 2, 3.
- I really don't like any of that (indistinct).
- Oh no.
- Oh.
- What is it?
- Oh my God.
- What is that?
- Is it cheese?
That looks very like a kind of cheese doesn't it?
- Oh my God.
- No, no cheese.
- I ain't getting the cheese.
- Get the cheese.
- You make this up as a joke?
- [Interviewer] This is a bacon and cheese doughnut guys.
- What!
- So bad.
- Cheese in my doughnut.
- This is 'cause we put our fingers in the last one.
You were like, well fuck you.
- [Sean] That's definitely squeezy cheese.
- [Justine] Oh yeah.
- [Sean] That's out of a can.
- [Justine] Oh yeah.
- Like they could have just left it at the bacon
in the maple syrup, the chocolate and the donut.
Why did they have to go for the cheese?
- Like it's not like even nice cheese.
It's the horrible, easy single cheese,
isn't it?
- It's like, how is it still in liquid form?
- Now, this is pure Irish thinking.
They, they know what they're doing.
- Don't they have bacon and cheese sandwiches.
- We'll show them.
- What if we put that?
- Why you take the perfect donut
and just ruin it with cheese?
- It was actually really nice
with the bacon and the doughnut.
And then the cheese just ruined everything.
- [Interviewer] What does this one get out ten?
- Zero minus 50.
- Yeah , one hundred percent.
It's like...
- Oh my God
- The negative scale doesn't go down far enough for this.
- This gets a zero outta 10 from me.
- A big fat zero.
- Everything is really nice until the cheese.
The cheese is what...
And I tasted the cheese before I even tasted the doughnut
and I got like a shock of me life.
- I'm very full
- I'm stuffed.
Like just stick a fork of me 'cause I'm fit to burst.
- Oh I can't believe I ruined a good jumper for this.
I ruined a good jumper
This is going straight in the bin,
along with the majority of those donuts
'cause that's where they belong.
- We were on an airplane, there with no turbulence.
We were sipping on our little drink
thinking about our holiday.
And then we went into a storm at the end.
- Guys, if you enjoyed us watching
dirty, disgusting doughnuts
and you'd like to see us eat more,
maybe nice things or drink some stuff,
then subscribe, like, comment, share,
click the notification bell for all.
We upload new videos Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.
And what do we wanna tell them, Justine?
- No more cheese in doughnuts please.