Hey everyone, Kyle here with winthehouseyoulove.com A
quick word about the stress.
So everybody knows that COVID is going on right now and it's changing so much.
And, what I'm seeing is a lot of frustration happening with people who are
wanting to purchase a home and where you might be right now, is you've been working
on your game plan, you've been working on your credit, you've been working
on your savings, you've been learning lots of things, you've been watching
videos, but then things keep changing.
The rules about mortgages change, the home buying landscape changes,
things are more competitive homes are increasing and their value.
It's difficult now to get a mortgage.
And it can feel like everything just got pushed back even farther.
Okay.
So I want to talk about the stress really quickly and some of the ways that we can
deal with the stress that happens here.
Events like this give us the opportunity to pull back a little bit and take a
zoomed out view and see, okay, what's actually going on because sometimes we can
get so focused on the goal that we have, that when we get roadblocks in the way.
All we're focused on is the next roadblock and the next roadblock and the next
roadblock and all that does is create more anxiety and frustration and stress.
And sometimes when we hit roadblocks, that's an opportunity for us to
zoom out and actually see what does the whole map look like.
Maybe we don't need to have a such a tuned in view.
Maybe we need to scale back for just a second.
So, all of that to say, if you're in that place where you're saying I've been doing
all this work, I've been learning so much.
And as I'm trying to actually enter in, I was doing everything I was told
to do, and I'm entering into this, and now I'm getting met with pushback.
This might be a great time for you to say what if I took this energy that
I was pouring into, buying a home and maybe I can redirect that into
something else for the time being.
And what I don't want to happen for you is for you to run into these roadblocks and
feel like, you know what I'm giving up.
I don't want to ever purchase a home again.
This is too stressful because buying a home on its own is
a stressful event enough.
Let alone, when you add a global pandemic to it and you add this crazy
sellers market across the nation.
So what I want you to be able to do is go from a place of confusion and frustration
to a place of peace and of ca l m.
So two things that I want you to do first, I want you to just
write out how you're feeling.
anytime I have, things that I'm, I'm kind of, mulling over in my mind,
or that are frustrating, it really is so helpful to be able to write
those down or to type those down.
And then it's amazing to look at and see, oh, okay, these, these feelings,
we're all kind of bottled up inside.
And what happens in our mind is there all these like half thoughts, right?
They're not these complete logical thoughts that go on in our mind.
They're these kind of half open loops.
And what we need to do is we actually need to pick apart those pieces in
our brain, put them down on a piece of paper or type them out on some
notes so we can actually see what's going on and we can help ourselves
process that information a little bit.
So open up a note on your phone, or take out a piece of paper and start
writing down: how are you feeling about what you're going through right now?
What's the frustration that you have?
You can use that to vent.
You can say I've been doing all this work, here's where I want to
go, and here's the frustrations and the roadblocks that I'm meeting.
Then, you can use that to say, okay, this is my zoomed out view.
I see the bigger picture.
I see that this isn't just about me.
This isn't my fault.
There are things that are going on externally around me that are
affecting where I'm at right now.
And maybe I use that as an opportunity, slow down instead of continuing to
push and being met with frustration.
Maybe I can pull back a little bit.
So do that.
That's going to help you understand more of how you're feeling that way
you don't have all these half thoughts, creating so much frustration and
tension and anxiety inside of yourself.
Then number two, I want you to, to use a community, to be able to
explore those thoughts and feelings with other people as well, because
if you're experiencing something, anything, it doesn't matter what it is.
If it's frustration with home buying or if it's a difficulty in a relationship,
or if it's financial issues, no matter what you're experiencing, somebody
else's going through the same thing.
And it takes somebody who has the courage to be able to say, hey, I'm
going through this to be able to start a vulnerable conversation and create
community with other people, right?
Because you're not alone in the struggles that you're going through.
And so being able to talk with a family member or a friend, or even a stranger
at a coffee shop to be able to say, hey, yeah, this is something that I'm, that
I'm going through and you'll find that you'll feel so much less alone in the
difficulty that you might be feeling with all the stress that's going on when you're
able to draw that connection and realize, Oh, okay, they're going through it too.
And there's something about when we recognize that there is community in
the struggle that we're going through that adds a little bit of levity.
It helps us realize, okay.
It helps us zoom out and see the bigger picture of how everything is working.
So I want you to do those two things.
I want you to journal a little bit, and I want you to maybe talk with a friend or
a family member, about what's going on.
So you can kind of find some connection in the confusion.
So I know that this is a difficult time for buying a home, and it
can be really stressful, but.
I want you to take this as a time, maybe you slow down a little bit.
What I don't want to happen to you is for you to get burnout because
you're running into these frustrations because it's not about you.
It's not your fault.
You're doing the work, you're doing the right things.
Sometimes it takes time and there are things that happen outside
of us that we can't control.
And we roll with the punches.
Alright.
So if I can help you in any way, let me know in a comment and I'd
love to see what I can do to help ease some of that stress for you.