(Anthony) The first thing 99% of guys would do if they woke up
as a woman would be fondle their boobs.
(Ian) SHUT UP!!!
It's never gonna fit.
(overlapping speech)
Hey, that's a pretty cool dress you got there.
Hey, quit harassing us, assholes.
Oh my god, seriously? All he did was compliment your dress.
- Yeah. - That's it.
No one ever compliments me.
Hey, no one ever compliments me either.
All right?
And look how much time I spent color coordinating my outfit.
This took a lot of time, and no one's noticed me.
Whatever, you guys just don't get it.
Being a girl can be a total bitch sometimes.
Come on. It's not that hard.
- Yeah, at least you got boobs. - Yeah, boobs.
Oh yeah, true.
No, no! Whatever.
Let's see you guys put on makeup!
Such bullsh*t how society forces us to wear makeup
to fit a certain mold of what people should look like.
Told you.
But I do feel more confident and pretty.
And my skin does look porcelain doll smooth.
- This is awesome! - I know!
Okay, okay.
You like being a girl now? Just wait until you have to remove
all your body hair.
(scary music)
All of it.
(ripping)
GYAAAH!
Hurts, huh?
Uh, no, I'm just excited I can finally fit in my skinny jeans
without 'em chaffing my legs up!
My skin feels like a rubbery dolphin.
I love dolphins! (giggles)
(straw clinks against cup loudly)
Ugh, whatever, assholes! How about peeing sitting down?
(tinkling)
Yeah, I really don't see what the big deal is.
I do this all this all the time.
Yeah, me too! Especially after the one time
when I was standing up while peeing, and pushed a little bit too hard.
(both) And a little bit of poop comes out!
(clapping) Yeah!
- Dude, it's like a little Pez dispenser. - Bloop, bloop, bloop!
Okay, fine.
Let's see how you handle not ever getting to eat what you want.
Yeah, never what you want.
(mouthing) I want you.
Oh my god.
- (chuckling) - Ah, ah, ah!
Dude, we gotta look as hot as Christian Bale by summer.
Remember? #Thinspiration.
Yeah, but you know what?
Since we can't eat anything, we'll have way more time for activities.
Yeah, I'm gonna go solve a crossword puzzle.
I'm gonna adopt an underprivileged Asian baby.
Why not adopt me? (giggles)
(red head) Angela!
(scoffs) Whatever.
You guys are never gonna like walking in high heels!
(huffing)
Oh my god, dude, this is awesome.
I'm getting a free calf workout, and don't even have to go the gym.
Yeah, it really lifts my buttocks.
(smack!)
Hoooo!
It's hard as concrete!
Being a girl rocks balls!
Okay, f*ckfaces, let's see how you deal with sexist cops!
(whispering) Hi.
- (siren wails) - Stop right there!
I just caught you speeding. You ran a red light,
and I saw you kick a nun in the ball sack!
(flirtatiously) I think we can work something out, officer.
(spluttering)
Um...you're free to go, sir.
Seriously?!
Okay, fine, how about dealing with fan girl urges?
Oh, [Callum], I wish you could just stroke my nipples
until they calloused over.
(Angela) Me too!
Argh! Okay, just stop.
Okay, you asked for it.
Time to bring out the big guns.
You know you don't have to wear those things anymore, right?
No, but they're super cute.
Yeah, they do look pretty good on you.
(groans in pain)
Are you okay?
Yeah, I just got this really stinging pain in my lower abdomen.
Yeah, dude, you don't look too good.
Okay, I'm fine!
Uh, why're you being so cranky?
Okay, why do you always have to get up my ass about everything?!
Dude, I'm just asking you if you're okay!
(screaming) Well, maybe you should mind your own f*cking business!
(screaming) Why are you yelling?! I'm not even doing anything!
- I SAID I WAS FINE! - (choking)
Hey, Anthony?
Oh, f*ck my life!
Relax, dude.
Yeah, it's just your period.
Oh (scoffs).
Sorry for going crazy on you, Anthony.
Vagina blood! (chuckles)
I think he's dead.
(flies buzz)
So maybe being a girl isn't all that easy, right?
Mmm, no. It's pretty easy.
Peace!
(groaning in pain)
Oh, oh god!
OW! FRICKING HEELS!
Being a girl SUCKS ASS!
[captioned by www.facebook.com/subtitleyoutube]