Today we ask the age-old question.
Will it meatloaf?
Let's talk about that.
( upbeat music playing )
Good mythical 2018!
We're back and we got a big season planned
for all you mythical beasts,
and it all starts right now.
Today we're gonna be testing a brand-new exercise hybrid
that I guarantee you've never see before.
- Mm-hmm. - And then we're gonna be looking
at some awkward things happening on Google Street View.
And don't forget, if you wanna make sure
you get the full GMM experience every day,
click the thumbnail with the...
Both: Green border!
...to watch from the beginning.
And also in 2018,
we plan on saying that less and less.
- 'Cause you know it by now. - That's right.
All right, we're gonna kick this season off right!
I can't think of anything more right...
Mm.
than a "Will it...?"
On today's menu, meat in the shape of a loaf,
as also known as "meatloaf."
It is time for...
Typically, meatloaf is made by mixing ground beef
with raw eggs, breadcrumbs, and ketchup,
and then smushing it all together
in a loaf shape and baking it in the oven.
Now, I have eaten many a-meatloaf,
but I have never done what I just said.
That's right, but what our amazing crew has done
is they've kept the raw eggs and the breadcrumbs as a binding agent,
then we've added in our "Will it...?" ingredients,
shaped it into a loaf, and baked it.
- Well, baked most of them. - Mm-hmm.
So not all these have ground beef in them,
but they all still look like a loaf.
Let's get started with the first one.
Bring it in.
Pizza is one of the greatest foods on the planet,
which is why it's been transformed into calzones,
Bagel Bites, Lunchables, and, as of today,
the pizza loaf.
We wanted to channel a meat lover's pizza
into a loaf form,
so this thing's got pepperoni,
sausage, bacon, Canadian bacon,
pancetta, ham, and pizza crust
blended up with eggs and breadcrumbs.
It's also got larger chunks on top,
marinara sauce mixed in,
- an entire log of mozzarella cheese... - Look at that.
...in the middle.
- Oh, gosh. - Where is it?
This thing looks so glorious.
Okay, Link, I'm just cutting you a slice, bro.
- Link: Over here. - Rhett: Get in on it.
I think that's the cheese log in the middle.
Here take a plate and...
- Oh, my goodness. - ...give yourself a slice.
Get something real, real nice.
- We call this "Meat Loafer's Pizza." - Oh, gosh.
It looks like a classic meatloaf,
except when you get closer, you're like...
"Wait a second."
This is like the deepest dish meat lover's pizza ever made.
Oh, thank you. Now I just received a knife
that I can actually cut "loafs" with.
Okay. Now, we have a side of ranch dressing.
Now, typically, I would take ketchup and pour all over the thing,
so I'm just gonna do that with the ranch.
Just a nice little boop.
- I'm gon' dip. - Then you can be a dipper.
I'm dippin'.
Oh, my goodness.
- Dink me. - Sink me.
- Mmm. No matter how you... - Very meaty.
...you arrange these ingredients,
you're always gonna be happy.
That is just the lesson of pizza.
And the ranch gives it a nice refreshing pop
that you would usually get from the ketchup.
I don't even need the ranch.
Oh, my goodness.
I don't need take a ride on the ranch.
- Guys... - I'm gonna stay right here on the loaf.
How many calories do you think this whole loaf--
Don't answer that question! Don't say the C-word.
I think we might be in five figures at this point.
- Stevie: Yeah, yeah. - This is a 10,000-calorie loaf.
Wow. But the real question is not that,
it's will pizza meatloaf?
Both:
Now, chips are great for parties,
but chip bowls take up a lot of real estate
on the party table.
But not no more they don't.
We've taken every single chip we can think of
and put it all in one place.
We present to you the chip loaf.
Good gracious!
You gotta squint 'cause it's so bright!
- Thing is orange. - Now, all our loaves are gonna come pre-sliced
so we don't have to go through that every single time,
so we've got some end pieces for ourselves.
Just drop it right on there.
This thing has Barbecue Lay's,
Nacho Cheese Doritos, Original Pringles,
Country Flamin' Hot Cheetos...
- "Crunchry"? - I said "country."
- Crunchy. - Look at that.
They got this new product called Country Flamin' Hot Cheetos.
It's real big in South Carolina.
Garden Harvest Sun Chips, Original Fritos,
Salt and Vinegar Kettle Chips,
and Puffy Cheetos. And then--
- Boy, that's heavy. - This thing is solid!
Yeah, we've packed a lot into this.
- Oh, my gosh. - And then it's served with a French onion...
chip dip on the side.
- It's like if you steam-rolled... - Oh, gosh!
...the chip aisle in a grocery store.
Just steam-rolled it and then...
You don't need a fork for this.
I think this is just a dip and dink.
- Oh, yeah. - This is a dip and dink situation.
French onion?
'Cause you know this is gon' be dry.
Yeah, don't overpower it.
Dink it! Sink it!
Oh. Hmm.
- It is dry. - ( laughter )
It's corny. Lot of corn.
If somebody were to decide to build a home
- out of chips... - ( chuckles ) Yeah.
...and then you went through and just swept up the construction site,
and then baked it all...
You could bore a hole in there
and make a chip-gloo.
- Yeah. - A chip igloo for like a guinea pig.
Now, there's something-- The chip flavor is great,
but this is one of those situations where...
You're missing the crunch.
You're missing the texture and the crunch
and the shape. The presentation of a chip...
is supposed to be a chip.
It's not supposed to be a loaf.
And there was no way to know that until right now.
That's the wonderful thing about this show,
is that we answer these questions for you guys,
so now you know you don't need to loaf a chip.
Yeah, I had high hopes, but,
chips, will they meatloaf?
Both:
All right, I am predicting that this next item
is gonna be a revelation amongst college students
across the world.
College students get ready
because we have taken every single item
from the Taco Bell menu and meatloaf-ed it.
We present to you the entire Taco Bell menu loaf.
And it's dressed kind of like Nachos BellGrande on top.
- Rhett: Look at that. - Link: It's like the general color of Taco Bell.
Ew, I don't like how that lettuce
is hanging out of the middle.
There's like a sheath of lettuce.
Just take that, Link.
Okay.
Again, it has everything in it.
It even has Baja Blast Mountain Dew mixed into it.
How'd you get that in there?
And it's like...
- it smells like Taco Bells. - Oh.
We got some Fire Sauce.
I feel like we gotta eat this with your hands.
If this is gonna catch on
amongst the students,
they don't have utensils.
You're just an animal.
You show up your freshman year, I remember,
and I was just like, it was either French bread pizza
or a burrito, and I ate that non-stop
- for seven months. - Look at your thumb.
- It's like... - Yeah, I'm going back to college.
Ah!
Whoa...
- I almost choked you on your own thumb. - Okay.
- That would've been weird. - I'm just gonna add some Fire Sauce here.
Okay. Dink it...
It's got potential 'cause it doesn't seem too hard.
...and sink it. Yeah.
- It feels soft. - It's got a softness to it.
You gotta have a softness in your loaf.
Consistency is great. Taste is not bad.
- Not bad at all. - This could work.
We're gonna have to set up a kiosk on every campus, though.
'Cause I think it's the kind of thing--
Hold on, I'm fluctuating a little.
No, don't fluctuate now, we've already committed.
You gotta convince me.
Think about the average mind of college student, okay?
Even a community college student.
- ( laughter ) - I mean, I'm talking--
Hey, that was last year, man, leave it be.
- No, I'm just saying... - Don't bring that into the new year.
I'm just saying any kind of college student.
You know what I'm saying?
They all-- what they need is they just need fuel
- for the things that they do. - Yeah.
It's like a brick, fuel brick.
- Taco brick. - And this is almost like the kinda thing...
- Taco Bell brick. - ...you just line 'em up.
Like, open your mouth.
You just line 'em up and you just stuff it,
you just stuff it in like that.
- ( grunts ) - You just...
You know?
And then they can keep studying,
they can keep doing the things with their hands.
- Mm! - They do writing and taking notes.
- Mm, I'm smart! - You know?
I'm getting real smart!
This is the perfect college food.
Mm-hmm.
But I just think we need an actual partnership
with Taco Bell 'cause I think they just need
to start selling this.
- Because I definitely don't wanna... - ( laughter )
You doing okay over there, college student?
Doing great. I think you've convinced me.
Okay.
Taco Bell menu,
will it meatloaf?
-
Now, if you like sushi, you've probably heard of
and had a sushi boat.
And if you can boat it, why can't you loaf it?
Let's bring in the sushi loaf.
No!
Yes, Link.
All your dreams are coming true.
It looks beautiful. Oh, my God.
And look at the cross-section of this thing.
It looks like just a dead fish laying on a board
with the innards still inside of it.
Okay, well, I'm about to give you a description of this thing
that's gonna make you want to eat it so bad, Link.
So instead of breadcrumbs and actual eggs,
this is the one loaf that we're using sushi rice and salmon roe,
technically eggs, as the binding agent.
And then we've got salmon and tuna sashimi
blended up with the rice to make a paste.
We got a freshwater eel roll that's coming right through the middle,
we got a California roll coming right through the middle,
and a spicy tuna roll,
and then the whole thing is wrapped in seaweed.
And then we've got some assorted sashimi on top,
spicy mayo, eel sauce, and then, of course,
we do have a sushi boat with the, you know, the fixings.
And this thing is, of course, not baked... because it's sushi.
- Or anything, except just assembled. - It's assembled.
All right, let me dump a little...
Look at what I caught.
- Dump a lot. - This came right off of the boat.
Pull it into the boat.
Oh, wow, Link, you're gonna love this.
I can already tell.
( shudders )
Even for a guy who likes sushi,
I think this may be hard to handle.
I don't know where to start.
You're supposed to eat a whole piece at once.
Piece of sushi in a bite, yeah, but...
I mean, there's three rolls inside of it.
Yeah, I'm grabbing a little bit of that roll.
And a little bit...
gotta get some of those eggs off the top.
And then I'm gonna take a dive... in the boat.
Eh... I'm...
And then I'm gonna stand by and wait to dink.
I'm obliterating this thing. Okay.
You want some of the wasabi?
Can't hurt, can it?
Well, that amount can.
- Oh, that's too much? - No, no, no, no, that's perfect, that's perfect.
I was joking, you have to eat that whole ball
in order to feel anything.
- Dink it. - And sink it.
Ah!
Tastes just like sushi.
The green stuff is helping.
- Whoo! But it's strong. - Yeah.
I will note that I'm not actually gagging.
- Like... - Noted.
I've started to put some types of sushi in my mouth
in, like, social circles.
- Just put 'em in your mouth? - Yeah.
And Christy's like, "He's not eating, he's just testing it."
Just putting it in my mouth is something that
I've grown to do.
So I think I might be able to get this down.
Well, while you're trying to get it down,
now, here's the issue.
- The taste is great. - No.
It tastes like sushi, but the problem is is that
sushi has already achieved
this wonderful form, like you said,
the individual--
like, once you start making it look like
the inside of an animal, and just kinda cutting it
- like a loaf... - Exactly.
...it really loses all of its appeal.
It's like sushi for a giant.
So if you got a giant coming over for dinner
and they're like, "Me want sushi!",
give 'em this.
Otherwise, sushi, will it loaf?
Both:
Throughout history, people have found strange things and asked,
"I wonder what that tastes like."
Balut is a prime example.
It is a developed or developing bird embryo,
usually a duck, that is boiled and eaten...
- Ugh! - ...from the shell.
Um, this is a--
Yeah, you can see that there's like--
I see little bits of feather.
- I'm just saying... - Ugh.
that there's a little--
let's not dwell on what it is.
Let's move on to loafing it.
Yeah, which, you know what? May help.
Because looking at that just individually,
it's just like how did that become a thing?
But once you throw it in a loaf--
oh, it-- it looks like a...
a horrifying, loafed vomit thing.
It smells like a horror movie.
I can see feathers!
Look right there.
Right there is, like, hairy duck embryo
feather thingy.
Oh, gosh.
But we do have salt and pepper.
- This is a delicacy. - And lemon juice,
which is gonna make it all okay.
'Cause that's what they typically eat balut with...
- Hand me a plate. Hand me two plates. - ...in Vietnam
and other places.
Okay, so we got-- gimme.
Give me.
I want to make sure you get the one
- with the feathers on it. - I'm taking the-- ugh.
There's a whole-- there's just a whole egg teetering up there.
- Oh, gosh. - Now...
Can I quit now?
Can I just-- I feel like we should have
a little white flag that we can wave
- once a year. - Ah!
- And I'm gonna wave it on day one. - You want-- on day one?
Should I wave it on day one?
No.
- Maybe. - Hey, let's do that, though.
Each of us has a white flag
that we can wave just in case.
Once a year.
Shouldn't do it on day one, though, so...
Maybe the hairy part, maybe that's a really good part.
Gosh!
It's unpleasant to run a fork through.
It's gotta be unpleasant to actually put in your mouth.
Run a fork through it.
- Ugh! - I've run a fork through many a-loaf,
but none as heinous as this.
Let's not just immediately spit it out.
Everything in your body's gonna tell you
to get this little baby duck out of your mouth.
- Right, this is a new year. - Yeah.
We gotta bring our A-game to let the people know...
That's right, it's 2018!
- ...whether they should do this or not! - The year of the duck!
- 'Cause right now... - Is this the year of the duck?
- Is that a thing? - The embryo duck.
Mm, this is the year of the duck for us.
'Cause right now you're thinking,
"Hmm, maybe I'll do this.
Maybe I'll get a bunch of these baluts
and I'll make a loaf."
- Because who knows? - Maybe it'll be great.
We gotta tell 'em that it's a bad idea
or a good idea!
This is public service!
- Three... - Duck it...
- ...two, sink it! - And suck it.
( laughter )
( gags )
Lemon juice does help.
- Lemon juice is very over... - ( gags )
It's the idea, man. It's the idea.
- It's the idea. - The idea is what is making me vomit.
It tastes kinda like turkey stuffing.
Think of a new idea.
This is nothing but turkey stuffing in space.
Think of Sky City. You remember Sky City in Dunn,
that store that opened up next to Rose's?
And my mom was like, "Sky City's the new Rose's."
They got everything.
- Sky City, man. - Take me to Sky City.
Sky City would've never gone out of business
if they had a loaf of balut.
Sky City was so confusing because it was on the ground.
And it was in Dunn, which is just a town.
Hmm?
- ( gags ) - ( laughter )
I did it! I ate it!
I'm coming, hold on.
Join me! In the skies!
I'm running from the back. I'm in the toy section right now.
I'm coming, I'm coming up to the register.
Join me at the checkout counter.
Come on. Come on.
- Ah! - You did it!
You know what?
It's gonna be a good year, Link.
- It was horrible. - It's gonna be a great year.
But that wasn't great.
Duck embryo egg balut stuff,
will it loaf?
Both:
( coughing )
Ugh. Okay, well, now you know.
And, crew, this is all yours.
Oh, yeah. Speaking of crew,
they're gonna come on in "Good Mythical More"
and eat another loaf, which is...
an absolutely amazing candy meatloaf,
so stick around for that.
But before you do that,
make sure you stick around to watch us test out
a brand-new exercise that involves a bench press and coffee.
Wish this video was longer and in your earbuds?
You'll love the latest episode of our "Ear Biscuits" podcast,
available now wherever you ear-consume your podcasts.