Hey everyone, and welcome to TopThink.
Today, we are going to learn about 10 habits to master your emotions.
Now, let’s begin.
1.
Positive Experiences What do you do when you’re overwhelmed by
emotion?
What happens when you’re brimming with frustration, fear, or regret?
In these difficult moments, your thoughts spiral out of control.
Small problems turn into utter catastrophes, and it feels like there is nothing you can
do.
But there’s a way to master your emotions.
With the right habits, you can rescue yourself from overwhelming negativity and keep your
emotions under control.
Let’s say you’re burdened by a stupid mistake you made earlier today.
You said the wrong thing.
You missed an opportunity.
Whatever it was, you are filled with regret, wishing you could have done things differently.
Whenever you’re trapped in a whirlpool of negativity, count your blessings instead of
your burdens.
In other words, shift your attention from negative experiences to positive experiences.
Don’t think about your mistakes or regrets.
Instead, focus on happy, uplifting moments in your life.
It helps to make a list of exciting, inspiring, and memorable experiences.
Think about obstacles you’ve overcome or goals you’ve accomplished.
Think about your adventures, your passions, and your closest friends.
Because there’s more to life than bad experiences.
If you can remember your most positive moments, you can rescue yourself from even the most
overwhelming emotions.
2.
Mental Movement When you’re ruminating on bad experiences,
physical movement can relieve tension and help you work through complicated emotions.
You may not think physical movement affects the way you think, but exercising your body
has a profound impact on your mood and state of mind.
Exercise is a proven stress-reliever, a source of motivation, and an easy outlet for your
negativity.
It also provides balance in your life, giving you a much-needed sense of stability and control.
When you’re struggling to manage your emotions, get your body moving.
Do 15 minutes of yoga.
Walk around your neighborhood.
Stretch your arms and legs.
Because a little bit of movement can completely change the way you feel.
3.
Ask Yourself Questions Do you ever ask yourself how you’re feeling?
When someone else is feeling down, you ask them questions like, “what’s wrong?”
or “are you feeling ok?”
But most people don’t afford themselves the same kindness.
When you’re feeling down, you expect yourself to snap right out of it.
You get annoyed with yourself when your negative feelings don’t disappear instantly.
But what if you treated yourself like you treat your friends or your partner?
When you’re struggling to control your emotions, ask yourself questions about the way you feel.
Dig deeper into the emotions that create stress and negativity in your life.
It might feel weird to have a conversation with yourself.
You might feel stupid asking yourself questions.
But these moments of self-compassions help you understand the way you feel.
And the better you understand your emotions, the more you can control them.
4.
Labeling Your Fears Labeling your feelings is another helpful
technique to control your emotions.
Many people struggle to cope with negativity because they don’t know what they feel or
why they’re feeling it.
For example, you might be feeling down after making a mistake at work.
You know you’re feeling negative, but why are you feeling negative?
Are you anxious about making more mistakes in the future?
Are you worried about what your coworkers think of you?
Or are you mad at yourself for making an error you should not have made?
Each feeling points toward a unique, complicated emotion that affects you in a specific way.
If you treat all the three the way, you’re not going to solve any of your problems.
But if you figure out exactly what you’re feeling, you can address your feelings and
find coping mechanisms that work for you.
So, whenever you’re feeling down, give your feelings a name.
Are you angry?
Are you sad?
Are you ashamed or insecure?
Be specific because every emotion, even the ones you don’t like, deserve your time and
attention.
5.
Buying Satisfaction Spending money is one of the most popular
coping mechanisms in the world.
People buy expensive or luxurious items to fill voids in their lives.
But, as everyone knows, money doesn’t buy you happiness.
No amount of reckless spending is going to change the way you feel — not in any lasting
capacity.
But that doesn’t mean money can’t affect your emotions.
This comes from a 2011 study in the Journal of Consumer Psychology.
Researchers found that certain spending habits foster more positive emotions.
For example, they found a strong correlation between feelings of satisfaction and charitable
donations.
Giving money to people in need can bring you more happiness than spending money on yourself.
Researchers saw similar results in people who spent money on memorable experiences instead
of material goods.
In other words, spending money won’t make you happy.
You can’t buy a lifetime of positivity.
But you can control the money you spend and the things you buy.
By making more meaningful purchases, you can lay a foundation for a happier life.
6.
Distinguishing Feelings According to a 2001 study in the journal Cognition
and Emotion, one skill set gives you significantly more control over your emotions.
Take anger and frustration.
People often use these emotions interchangeably, but they mean different things.
You experience anger when a person or event has in some way done you wrong.
For example, if someone makes fun of you, that makes you angry.
You experience frustration, on the other hand, when you encounter something you cannot change
or control.
Let’s say you worked hard to earn a promotion, but the promotion went to somebody else instead.
That makes you frustrated.
In that 2001 study, researchers found that people who can distinguish between feelings,
like anger and frustration, had more control over their emotions.
These people had a clearer picture of what they were feeling and why, so they could cope
with their feelings more effectively.
So, if you want to manage your emotions, spend a few minutes every day understanding what
each emotion means.
You’ll be surprised how diverse your feelings can get.
7.
Self-Expression How often do you write about your thoughts
and feelings?
Writing doesn’t come naturally to everyone.
Some people avoid writing because they place high expectations on themselves to say something
meaningful or profound.
Other people stare at a blank page and think, “I don’t have anything to say.”
But that’s why writing in a journal is such a valuable habit.
Journals give you a place to write in total privacy.
No one will read what you write.
No one will know what you said or didn’t say.
That means you can write about anything you want in any way you want.
If you want to better understand your emotions, for example, your journal may be an outlet
for your feelings.
In those pages, you can ask yourself questions, analyze emotions, and discuss your problems
without fear of judgment or criticism.
Even if you don’t know what to say, try for just 15 minutes to write about your emotions.
Say whatever comes to your mind.
Explore whatever you feel.
You may not say anything special or profound, but even the simplest forms of expression
can change your perspective.
8.
Simple Mantras Mantras are another coping mechanism few people
use or acknowledge.
A mantra is a short phrase that reminds you to embrace or embody a more positive emotional
state.
For example, when you’re overburdened by stress, your mantra might be something like,
“I am relaxed, and I am capable.”
Phrases like these are simple but powerful reminders that you are in control.
Whenever your emotions get away from you, use your mantra to keep you grounded and on
top of your emotions.
But first, find a mantra that resonates with you on a deeper level.
Make your mantra as personal or specific as you need.
Repeat your mantra whenever your emotions are spiraling out of control.
If you believe what you say, one simple phrase can put you on a more positive path.
9.
Emotional Toxins To gain more control of your emotions, you
need to change how you cope with negativity.
Many people bully their emotions into submission.
You get angry at your anger.
Frustrated with your frustration.
But your emotions are not a toxin you need to rid from your body.
Instead, your negativity is like an injury you need to nurture and care for.
That means figuring out the root of the problem and paying attention to your vulnerabilities.
In other words, don’t treat your emotions like your enemy.
It’s not a bad thing to have a range of positive and negative emotions.
In fact, the most emotionally intelligent allow themselves to freely experience all
kinds of emotions, positive and negative.
The reason you lose control isn’t because you can get angry.
It’s because you’re ashamed of your anger.
If you stop denying your emotions, you may discover those feelings…
aren’t as toxic as you thought.
10.
Personal Space When you’re feeling overwhelmed, it’s
important to find space away from your work and your relationships.
Retreat to a place where you can think, breathe, and reflect on your feelings.
Because living your life is a heavy burden.
Responsibilities and expectations create stress, shame, and insecurity in your life, all of
which amplifies your negativity.
So, don’t be afraid to make space when you need it.
Even if you have a busy schedule, spend 5 minutes on your own.
That may not sound like much, but five minutes of solitude can stabilize your mood, clear
away the fog, and give you some much needed perspective.
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