We were afraid you were going to be born
on the side of the road.
But thankfully a black limo pulled up.
Could have knocked me over with a feather.
It was the president and the first lady.
When I told them what was going on,
they offered to give us a ride to the hospital.
Everything was looking fine again.
But you weren't a very patient baby.
We weren't going to make it to the hospital.
You were going to be delivered by the president,
until he passed out.
Then, the first lady took over.
What an amazing woman.
She was so cool under pressure.
Of course, you had to hear that from me,
since you were passed out, too.
That's not how I remember it.
Anyway, she delivered you right there in the limo.
When we saw you for the first time, our hearts just melted.
Yeah!
What about the time Lincoln got into Mom's cosmetics?
Now, there's a story you couldn't make up.
[laughing]
Hey Dad, could you help me with my social studies homework?
Eh, sorry, son. It'll have to wait.
It's throwback Thursday, and I have to post some pics and post.
[screaming]
What did you do?!
How could you post a picture from my awkward stage?
Ooh! Five likes already?
[gasping]
Maybe it'll start trending.
[screaming]
Don't be embarrassed, Lori.
Everyone posts old photos like that.
They're harmless.
And post.
Oh yeah? Then maybe you'd like to see Dad's latest post.
Hashtag potty champ, hashtag Linky made a stinky.
Uh.
So cute!
I'll post this next tbt.
Nope.
[gasping]
Jackpot!
We got two of a kind!
And then Lynn came out of nowhere,
and roller skated right over him.
It's okay.
I can fix him, though I'm not sure he'll ever shuffle again.
Dad, One Eyed Jack and I
have solved the case of the missing balogna.
We got the culprit right here.
Good work, boys. You've done it again!
Ace and Jack forever!
Dudes!
Remember what happened at Lincoln's sixth birthday party?
[laughing]
At the bowling alley?
I'll never forget that!
[screaming]
[laughing]
That was the only strike you ever got, Lame-o!
[sighing]
Thanks anyway, guys, but it's useless.
My childhood memories are already gone.
I can't even remember what happened
at my seventh birthday party.
I can. You had a magician.
You literally freaked out about his rabbit.
[screaming]
[laughing]
I can't believe you remember that.
I caught it!
Yes!
[laughing]
I don't know what I was so afraid of.
Sports can be pretty awesome.
And it turns out, I'm a natural.
Loud, you ran the wrong way
and scored a safety for the other team!
We lost!
Yeah!
Uh oh.
[screaming]
A correction to my previous statement,
I am not a natural, but on the plus side,
at least I'm getting some exercise.
Gah! Charlie horse!
Today is the Fifth Grade Internship Fair,
and Clyde and I are making sure to put our best foot forward.
'Cause there's only one place we wanna work.
Flip's Food & Fuel!
Good morrow, fine sir.
I'm Clyde McBride and this is my associate, Lincoln Loud.
Together we're known as Clincoln McCloud!
We're a team.
We'd love the opportunity to work at your fine establishment,
as a team.
Two for one? Now, you're speaking Flip's language.
If you peruse our joint resume, I think you'll find...
Never mind that! Either of you got a criminal record?
- No! - You're hired!
Wahoo!
We'll get to see where the nacho cheese comes from!
And read the comics as soon as they're delivered!
And use the flippy machine!
Ooh Flippies!
Hey, stinking McFart Cloud!
Your internship started ten seconds ago!
Hold still.
Got it.
Whoa! Great shot.
First mustache hair ever.
This one's definitely going in the Lincoln Library.
Lincoln Library?
Yep, It's the folder
where I keep all my cherished memories.
Check it out. Here's me and Lynn in the bathtub,
Lori feeding me my first ice cream,
my first mechanical pony ride,
and now my first mustache hair.
Whoa! Where are you going?
[gasping]
No, no, no! Stop!
Oh no, no, no, no!
[gasping]
All my childhood memories are gone.
Yep. Just eating some raw fish for breakfast.
Pretty wild, huh?
Meh, not in Japan.
How about covered in syrup?
Are you sure you don't want a ride to school?
Thanks, But I'm good.
Watch out for potholders!
What?
[screaming]
Oh, I meant pot holes!
Well, this is different.
Not sure how you're gonna participate
in today's spelling bee.
[neighing]
Woo woo woo.
Front gate commencing opening sequence.
Whoa!
Eee!
Welome Space Cadets!
My name's Taryn. And I'll be your camp counselor.
Ready for your first activity?
You'll be hunting for moon rocks in real space suits.
- Moon rocks! - Space suits!
Eee!
[laughing]
Woo oh!
Ahh!
Phew! This is a lot more tiring than looks on TV.
Ah.
My inhaler!
I got it!
Oh!
Whoa!
♪ This is it, middle school ♪
♪ And we'll make This day look easy ♪
♪ But we're not lit ♪
♪ We're not cool ♪
♪ And my stomach's Really queasy ♪
♪ I don't think I can go through with it ♪
♪ Just take a deep Breath and get a grip ♪
♪ Our strategy is tight ♪
♪ Our game is strong ♪
♪ We got this, we got this ♪
♪ We'll get through It all together ♪
♪ We got this, we got this ♪
♪ We're invincible ♪
♪ We're a team, we're a troop ♪
♪ We're the best Forever friend group ♪
♪ I've got your back ♪
♪ I know that you've got mine ♪
♪ Trust me, we'll be fine ♪
Okay.
Sorry. I guess that's the end of the talent show.
No, it's not!
Now, who Is ready for some magic?
Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Lincoln, the Magnificent!
And these guys in the shiny pants are my volunteers.
Their methods may be questionable,
but they're always looking out for me.
Chef Pat, kick it!
Ah.
Oh.
[laughing]
What?
[gasping]
[laughing]
Tada!
[cheering]
You ready to do this, buddy?
Well, Leon's a master, but my voice
still isn't a hundred percent.
I'm going to need some backup.
[gasping]
You got it, bud!
Wait. You do mean me, right?
♪ If you're feeling out of sors And everything has gone awry ♪
♪ If you think you've lost your way ♪
♪ Well, there's no Need to sit and cry ♪
♪ In this herky jerky world ♪
♪ You shouldn't Need to say goodbye ♪
♪ I'm sure I can't Fly twice as high ♪
♪ If I know you're my ally ♪
Yes! Yes! Yes!
This was my vision. Woo hoo!
♪ Together we're in harmony ♪
Ooh!
Wasn't me!