Hey guys, it’s your favourite breakup coach here, and I’m back with another video that’s
going to help you get a second chance with your ex.
My name, of course, is Brad Browning… or Breakup Brad if you prefer…
I’m the author of the best-selling Ex Factor program, I’m a relationship coach and breakup
expert from Vancouver BC…. and I’m here today to help you figure out the true meaning
behind your ex’s text messages.
If you’re like most of my clients, I’m sure you’ve received messages from your
ex where you knew they weren’t telling the truth… or maybe the message just seemed
suspicious and you wondered what was actually going through your ex’s mind when they sent
it.
Let’s go through some common texts you might receive from your ex and read between the
lines to find out the true meaning.
Quickly though, before I begin, let me just throw in a little disclaimer: no two people
are alike, no two breakups are alike, and there’s no foolproof way to read your ex’s
mind.
Beware of over-analyzing or jumping to conclusions.
One text isn’t enough to determine whether your ex will take you back or not, so don’t
try to read that much into it.
if you’re desperate to find out whether you’ve still got a chance with your ex,
you can use the free quiz tool I created instead…
the quiz is at BreakupBrad.com/Quiz, it’s free and it takes about 5 minutes.
www.BreakupBrad.com/Quiz
Anyway, with that disclaimer out of the way, let’s start with the first type of message
your ex might send...
Text #1: The one-word “indifferent” text Maybe you’ve got a message from your ex
that said nothing but “yeah” or “ok” or “lol”....
You know, those replies that feel like your ex was trying to shut down the conversation
or stop the discussion in its tracks.
Well, most of the time, that feeling is accurate, and your ex just wants to end the conversation.
So if you get one of these one-word replies from your ex, especially if it’s in a situation
where you’ve been talking about something of interest, or if you’ve said something
would normally generate a longer, more normal text in response… then take notice and don’t
try to dig for more.
Sometimes the one-word replies mean that your ex is tired of you and you need to back WAAAY
off, and sometimes it’s just because they’re in a bad mood or in the middle of something
and don’t want to be bothered.
Either way, it’s time to give them some time and don’t try to force them to continue
talking…
I recommend you wait until your ex reaches out to you again and begins the next conversation,
and until then you just stick to radio silence.
Text #2: The “I miss you” text This is the most painful type of text you
can receive from your ex… often you’ll receive it late at night, when your ex is
lonely and has time to think things over.
They might say “I miss you” or “I still love you” or something along those lines
that indicates they perhaps want to get back together.
It might be included in a longer message, or maybe they’ll saying nothing but “i
miss you” out of the blue.
Either way, it’s simultaneously both a good sign and an annoying text to deal with.
It’s good news because it means your ex is still thinking about you, feeling emotional
about the breakup, and you’ve been doing the right things.
It’s tough because it can also give you false hope…
I see it all the time where one of my clients will receive a message like this from their
ex, only to find the next 3 texts they send get ignored altogether.
This kind of ‘hot and cold’, mixed messages behaviour is really common, and it means you
shouldn’t get too emotional in your reply.
In fact, I recommend either not replying at all (if it’s appropriate in the context
of the conversation) or saying something to change the topic, like “I miss you too!
Speaking of missing, did you ever find that library book that disappeared from your car?!?”.
Text #3: The “Are you seeing anyone” text This one is a bit less common, but I still
get questions about this type of message from clients pretty regularly.
In almost all situations, if your ex asks you who you’re dating or if you’ve been
seeing anyone since the breakup, it’s great news.
They wouldn’t ask if they weren’t feeling at least a bit jealous, and they’re perhaps
worried -- even subconsciously -- that they’re losing you to another guy or girl.
Don’t drop what you’re doing and reply asking your ex to get back together…
just because you get an encouraging text like that, or any text that suggests your ex is
jealous, doesn’t mean they want you back.
But it is a positive sign.
Reply with either a joke to get off the topic -- for example, say something like, “yeah
well, you know me, I’ve always got at least 3 tall blondes on the go” -- or just give
a vague answer that will leave the truth a mystery.
Text #4: The “I hate you” text Sometimes, your ex might be mean and say hurtful
stuff.
I see this pretty regularly, and it often comes out of the blue… you and your ex might
have ended things on good terms, but then they begin to get angry or mean for no apparent
reason.
It’s usually not quite as blunt as “I hate you”....
Your ex might hint at how they’re so much better off now, they might bring up old arguments,
or they might give you hell for something you did in the past.
Either way, getting this kind of message sucks.
It’s usually actually a positive sign, though, unless you actually did something or said
something that would justify your ex’s fury.
If not, especially if it seems unnecessary and comes out of the blue, you know your ex
is thinking about you and emotions are still running strong.
ALWAYS ignore this type of message, NEVER let yourself get dragged into an argument
or let your ex know their words got to you.
There’s nothing more powerful than ignoring a text from your ex that’s intended to be
hurtful or cause an argument.
Text #5: No text at all!
Ok, if your ex doesn’t reply to you at all, it isn’t really a ‘text’, per se…
but it’s definitely a ‘message’ they’re sending.
There are two things that might explain their lack of a reply… ok well, there’s three
actually.
First, your ex could just be busy.
It happens.
Second, it’s possible your ex still has feelings for you and doesn’t want to bring
up those painful emotions by chatting with you, which is generally a good sign.
Third, you might’ve been too needy and sent too many irritating or uninteresting texts,
and your ex just isn’t into it.
The latter option is the most common, but regardless of the true meaning behind your
ex’s lack of response, the best option is to do NOTHING.
If your ex is missing you and feeling too emotional to talk with you, they’ll probably
give in at some point and reach out.
If they’re simply busy, they’ll get back to you later.
And if you’ve come on too strong or haven’t been a fun texting partner, then you definitely
need to back off for at least a week or two.
OK, ladies and gentlemen, that’s 5 common messages and what they really mean…
there’s a ton of other things your ex might say as well that I haven’t covered in this
video.
If you want my opinion on something your ex has texted you or said to you, there’s two
options: if it’s a quick question I can answer in a sentence or two, just leave a
comment below this video and I’ll get back to you within a few days..
I try to answer as many of your comments as I can.
If you’ve got a more complicated situation or need ongoing 1-on-1 help, I offer coaching
to a limited number of clients…
you can sign up for coaching at BreakupBrad.com/coaching.
Once you sign up, I’ll learn about your situation, give you my take, and guide you
through the process of getting your ex back for good.
So... please, register for coaching, leave a comment below, subscribe to my channel,
shower me with lavish gifts… you know the drill.
Thanks for tuning in, I’ll be back again with another video soon.
See you then!