JON!
JON.
IF I'M NOT MISTAKEN, IF I'M NOT MISTAKEN, AND, PLEASE, PLEASE
CORRECT ME IF I'M WRONG HERE, BUT YOU APPEAR TO HAVE SOME VERY
SPECIAL GUESTS WITH THE BAND TONIGHT.
WOULD YOU PLEASE TELL US WHO IS SITTING IN.
>> Jon: BLUES LEGENDS CAB MOW AND TAJ MAHAL.
>> YEAH, BABY!
>> Stephen: THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE, GENTLEMEN.
WE'LL BE HEARING SONGS FROM THEIR NEW BLUES ALBUM TONIGHT,
TAJ MO.
THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY FIRST GUEST TONIGHT IS ONE OF MY
FAVORITE ACTORS, AND I WISH HE WAS PRESIDENT.
PLIEZ WELCOME THE GREAT SIR ALEC BALDWIN.
♪ ♪ ♪ ( APPLAUSE )
>> WOOO!
WOW!
WHAT A NICE CROWD YOU HAVE.
>> Stephen: THEY ARE LOVELY PEOPLE.
WE DECIDED TO HAVE A NICE CROWD FOR YOU TONIGHT.
BECAUSE OF YOU, WE DECIDED TO HAVE THE BEST CROWD OF THE WEEK.
>> IT'S CHILLY IN HERE.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: IT'S COMEDY
WEATHER.
IT'S COMEDY WEATHER.
KEEPS THE GUESTS FRESH.
>> I WAS IN MY CLOSET AND THOUGHT I HAVE A FEW SUITS TO
PUT ON AND I SAID I'M NOT GOING TO WEAR A SUIT, I HAVE THIS
DIRTY-- I CALL IT THE SPRINGSTEEN LOOK, MY BLACK
SHIRT.
"SO WHAT'S UP?" I'M SORRY, I DIDN'T DRESS UP FOR
YOU.
>> Stephen: YOU ARE ALWAYS DRESSED UP.
YOU LOOK LIKE YOU ARE ABOUT TO DO TAE KWON DO OR SOMETHING.
>> I'M ABOUT TO CLEAN YOUR POOL.
>> Stephen: CAN I ASK YOU A QUICK QUESTIONS ABOUT THE
OBAMAS.
THEY WERE ON GEFFEN'S YACHT WITH OPRAH AND SPRINGSTEEN AND TOM
HANKS AND PAUL McCARTNEY.
DO YOU EVER DO STUFF LIKE THAT?
BECAUSE I HEAR ABOUT STUFF LIKE THAT, AND I GO, "I NEVER GET
INVITED TO THOSE PARTIES?
>> YOU DON'T?
>> Stephen: NO, I HAVEN'T.
>> WHY DO YOU THINK THAT IS?
( LAUGHTER ) NO, BUT I'M SAYING, LIKE --
>> Stephen: I'M TOO DARN BUSY.
>> YOU ARE.
SOMETIMES I SEEM TO MISS THAT, YOU KNOW, BECAUSE OF MY KIDS
AND, LIKE, I'LL BE MAKING A MOVIE, AND THE INVITATION WILL
COME AND SAY, "COME TO MICK JAGGER'S DAUGHTER'S WEDDING," OR
SOMETHING.
AND I'M LIKE, "I CAN'T.
I'M UP HERE IN CANADA MAKING A MOVIE."
I'LL SAY TO THEM, ," CAN I GET OUT OF WORK TO GO TO MICK
JAGGER'S DAUGHTER'S WEDDING."
"NO!
YOU CAN'T GET OUT OF WORK TO DO THAT."
>> Stephen: WHAT A HARD LIFE YOU HAVE.
>> MY WIFE WILL SAY, "NOBODY FEELS SORRY FOR YOU ALEC."
>> Stephen: NOBODY SHOULD FEEL SORRY FOR YOU.
YOU HAVE A LOVELY WIFE.
YOU HAVE A BRAND NEW DAUGHTER OR SON?
>> WE HAVE OUR SON, LEO, WHO WAS IN THE ROOM JUST NOW, AND WE HAD
TO CHANGE HIS DIAPER, AND WE WERE AFRAID SOMEBODY WAS GOING
TO WALK IN AND GO, "OH, ALEC, WHAT HAPPENED IN HERE?"
IT WAS THE BABY.
>> Stephen: OH, SURE.
NOT ONLY THE NEW BABY, BUT ALSO YOU HAVE ONE OF THE GREATEST
CAREERS OF ALL TIME, WHICH IS-- >> A SILLY THING WE'RE DOING
NOW.
>> Stephen: EXACTLY, RIGHT NOW.
WHEN I SAW YOUR DONALD TRUMP FOR THE FIRST TIME.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) I THINK, LIKE A LOT OF PEOPLE, I
THINK LIKE A LOT OF PEOPLE.
>> WHEN SAW YOUR TRUMP I WENT, "OH, THANK GOD.
SOMEBODY HAS CRACKED THAT NUT."
DO YOU LIKE DOING IT?
>> IT'S AMAZING.
I THINK MORE THAN ANYTHING IT'S KIND OF EERIE, ACTUALLY, MORE
THAN ANYTHING I HAVE EVER DONE, PEOPLE COME UP TO ME AND SAY
SOMETHING TO ME ON THE STREETS.
YOU ARE IN NEW YORK, AND PEOPLE COME UP TO THE ON THE STREET AND
SAY SOMETHING.
OUR DAUGHTER CARMEN IS THREE AND A HALF, AND I CALL HER THE
REINCARN AITION OF ELAINE STRICH.
THANK YOU THAT YOU GOT THAT.
PEOPLE WILL WALK UP TO ME, AND WE'LL BE PUTTING CARMEN IN HER
LITTLE STROLLER AND SOMEONE WILL WALK BY VERY QUIETLY AND GO,
"THANK YOU, THANK YOU.
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU."
THEY'RE LIKE THANK ME FOR THE TRUMP THING.
AND MY DAUGHTER CARMEN WILL LOOK AT THEM AND SAY, "I DON'T LIKE
YOU!" ( LAUGHTER )
LIKE ENOUGH OF THIS SLAPPING MY DAD ON THE BACK AND
CONGRATULATING HIM.
"JUST GO AWAY!" >> Stephen: WHAT'S YOUR
HOOK-IN?
WHAT IS THE THING YOU HAVE TO DO?
IS IT-- IS IT YOUR FACE?
IS IT THE HAIR?
IS IT THE HANDS?
IS IT THE VOICE.
>> THEY'RE SITTING THERE ON "S.N.L.."
AND I WAS GOING TO DO A MOVIE THIS LAST SUMMER, AND LOR LORNE
WOULD SAY, "I WANT YOU TO COME DO TRUMP?"
>> Stephen: "I WOULD LIKE YOU TO DO YOUR TRUMP, PLEASE.
>> "COME AND DO TRUMP EVERY SATURDAY FOR 18 CONSECUTIVE
WEEKS."
I GO DO THIS FILM, AND THE FILM FELL APART AND IT WAS KIND OF
WEIRD, ALL OF A SUDDEN THE MOVIE ENDED, I'M NOT GOING TO DO THE
MOVIE.
I PICKED UP THE PHONE AND CALLED LORNE AND SAID, "I'M TRUMP.
HERE I COME.
I'M ON MY WAY."
AND WE GET IN THE ROOM AND THEY SHOWED FOOTAGE OF HIM.
IT'S TOTALLY A CARICATURE.
YOU PICK A FEW THINGS.
I'M SITTING IN THE ROOM, LEFT EYEBROW UP, RIGHT EYEBROW DOWN,
SHOVE YOUR FACE OUT.
YOU'RE TRYING TO SUCK THE CHROME OFF THE FENDER OF A CAR.
YOU'RE LIKE.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: THANK YOU.
HEY, THANK YOU!
>> THANK YOU!
>> Stephen: NOW, TRUMP ISN'T YOUR FIRST SORT OF QUESTIONABLE
PRESIDENT.
YOU HAVE EXPERIENCE WITH BECAUSE I FOUND OUT YOU WENT TO G.W.,
RIGHT?
>> YES!
>> Stephen: GEORGE, WITH UNIVERSITY.
>> Stephen: YOU RAN FOR-- >> PRESIDENT OF THE SCHOOL.
>> Stephen: AND I'M REALLY JEALOUS, BECAUSE NIXON IS MY
GUY.
>> IS HE.
>> Stephen: I REMEMBER THE WATERGATE HEARINGS.
THAT'S MY FIRST INTRODUCTION TO PRESIDENCY AND YOU GOT THIS
FANTASTIC LETTER FROM NIXON RIGHT THERE, RICHARD NIXON
HIMSELF.
HE CALLS YOU ALEX.
>> YOU KNOW WHAT THE GREATEST PART IS, "FROM OUR MUTUAL FRIEND
MARK WEINBERG I HAVE LEARNED OF THE DISAPPOINTING RESULTS, AS
FAR AS YOU ARE CONCERNED" HE WRITES.
>> Stephen: "AS FAR AS YOU ARE CONCERNED OF THE RECENT GEORGE
WASHINGTON UNIVERSITY STUDENT BODY ELECTIONS.
YOU CARED ENOUGH TO ENTER THE ARENA."
ARE YOU EVER GOING TO RE-ENTER THE ARENA?
>> NO.
>> Stephen: ENTERTAINERS CAN BE PRESIDENTS.
>> YOU DID ONE OF THE MOST ASTUTE, SUPER POLITICAL SHOW FOR
YEARS, AND THAT IS I THINK TRUMP-- IT'S NOT GOING TO SWING
BACK-- IT'S NOT GOING TO STAY THAT WAY, MEANING IT'S NOT GOING
TO OPEN THE DOOR FOR NONTRADITIONAL CANDIDATE S.
>> Stephen: NO, NO, BASICALLY IS GOES COMPETENCY,
INCOMPETENCY, COMPETENCY.
>> RIGHT, IT GOES CRAZY, SAFE, CRAZY, SAFE.
( APPLAUSE ) BUT CLINTON, BUSH, OBAMA, TRUMP.
IS WILL SWING BACK.
SOME GUY WHO IS, LIKE, GOVERNOR, NEXT YEAR OF NEVADA --
>> Stephen: REALLY ANY OF PLACE WOULD BE NICE.
>> DO WE REALLY CARE AT THIS POINT?
>> Stephen: THE GUY FROM GOVERNOR'S ISLAND WOULD BE FINE.
>> GOVERNOR'S ISLAND.
THE MAYOR OF GOVERNOR'S ISLAND.
>> Stephen: WE HAVE TO TAKE A LITTLE BREAK BUT WE'LL BE RIGHT
BACK WITH ALEC BALDWIN AND HIS NEW BOOK "NEVERTHELESS."