- [Narrator] Hey, Psych2Goers,
welcome back.
Do you sometimes wish you had a different family?
Although, every family has its problems.
In a healthy home,
those problems can be overcome.
But if there's a dysfunctional family dynamic,
every new day brings a different set of challenges.
To help you recognize the signs
of a dysfunctional family dynamic,
here are some of the most common ones.
Number one, fear.
Have you ever tried to hide something from your parents?
Maybe a bad grade or a broken vase?
Discipline is important.
And sometimes parents may raise their voices.
Sometimes when kids make mistakes,
some consequences are needed.
If a child breaks the vase,
they'd have to clean the mess.
If they get a bad grade,
they'd have to spend extra time studying.
These are not examples of extremely bad things,
but some parents act
like every little mistake is terrible.
Like screaming at their children,
taking away their things,
forbidding them from seeing their friends
or even physically punishing them.
When this happens,
children learn to fear their parents,
even for mundane things.
So they feel like they need
to do everything perfectly.
Sometimes the fear is so great
they may even run away from home
because of fear of their parents' reaction.
Number two, codependency.
A codependent parent has an unhealthy preoccupation
with their children
that makes them excessively control their children's lives.
They may feel like their happiness and stability
depends on their children
or that their kids are responsible
for their health and overall wellbeing.
They may take care of their children,
even with things they should let their kids do
in order to grow and learn
like cleaning their rooms,
even if they're teenagers.
They consider their children their only friends
and may rarely hang out with other adults.
They may also use guilt tripping and gaslighting
to manipulate their kids
into doing what they want them to do.
This type of behavior can negatively impact
their kids' personality and identity,
since children see their parents as role models
and learn about the world
based on the behavior their parents exhibit.
So they become dependent on their parents too,
making the relationship unhealthy.
Number three, neglect.
Neglect is another common sign
that a family dynamic is not the healthiest.
It's a type of abuse.
Parents from dysfunctional families
often fail to take care
of their children as they should,
such as washing their clothes
or making sure their hair is clean and combed.
They don't help their kids with homework.
And often don't even know
if they go to school regularly.
Sometimes they may not even notice
if their kids have eaten,
the neglect can negatively impact
their children's mental health and physical health,
which is dangerous for their development.
Number four, silence.
In dysfunctional families,
communication doesn't happen very often.
Each family member might be closed off in their rooms,
doing their own thing,
and don't even open up to each other
or ask for advice.
They don't tell each other about their day
or something they're excited about.
Silent treatments can also happen
as a way to handle conflict.
And it can also be used as a punishment.
This can be especially harmful,
if parents use the silent treatment
as a form of discipline for their children.
If someone tries to break that silence
with honesty and openness,
other members could react by humiliating them
for stating their feelings
while the silence continues.
And number five, isolation.
Finally, dysfunctional families tend
to keep to each other and avoid letting anyone,
including other family members, friends,
or neighbors into their lives.
They keep their distance,
so that the secret
of an unhealthy family dynamic stays hidden.
Parents may tell their children
that other people are bad
and that they should avoid them
or make up lies about why nobody ever visits.
This makes it hard to receive any help
since their problems are not visible to others.
Is your family showing some of these signs?
If so, it's important that you take care of yourself
and seek help from a therapist
to help you deal with everyday life.
And keep in mind,
you won't have to deal with that environment forever.
There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Remember to like and share this video
with friends who may benefit.
As always, the references are shown
in the description below.
Until next time, friends.
Take care.
(gentle music)