>> THE PRESIDENT IS FIGHTING TOOTH AND NAIL WITH A LEAVE OF
LITIGATION.
>> HIS LAWYERS CONTINUE TO FILE INCREASINGLY THREADBARE
LAWSUITS.
>> DEAD PEOPLE VOTING IN NEVADA.
NONRESIDENTS VOTING, SOURCE OF ILLEGAL VOTES.
>> THEY PUSHED VIRAL VIDEOS THEY SAY SHOW BALLOT STUFFING IN
FLINT, MICHIGAN.
THE VIDEO WAS ACTUALLY FROM RUSSIA.
>> SOME OF THE SENIOR LAWYERS THERE ARE EXPRESSING CONCERNS.
THEY'RE PRETTY EMBARRASSES.
>> DID YOU LOSE AN ELECTION AND ARE DESPERATE TO OVERTURN THE
RESULTS, BUT NO ONE WILL TAKE THE CASE BECAUSE THEY STILL LOVE
THEIR COUNTRY?
THEN CALL US AT CORNSWORTH AND PINCHELY, ATTORNEYS AT LAW.
HELLO, I'M ROGER CORNSWORTH.
WE HAVE YEARS OF EXPERIENCE PROSECUTING IMAGINARY VOTER
FRAUD.
EVEN WITH ZERO EVIDENCE, WE WILL PROVE YOU LOST BECAUSE OF:
GLITCHES, NOT ENOUGH OBSERVERS, TOO MANY OBSERVERS, COUNTED
ILLEGAL VOTES, COUNTED LEGAL VOTES, SHARPIES WEREN'T ALLOWED,
SHARPIES WERE ALLOWED, VOTE WRITTEN ON A SANDWICH, YOU'RE A
TERRIBLE CANDIDATE, DEAD PEOPLE VOTED, NOT ENOUGH DEAD PEOPLE
VOTED, AND PEOPLE VOTED.
BUT DON'T TAKE MY WORD FOR IT, LISTEN TO THESE SATISFIED
CUSTOMERS.
>> (translated) : ROGER CORNSWORTH IS MY LAWYER FOR LIFE
BECAUSE HE MADE ME PRESIDENT FOR LIFE.
>>
HIM AND THE OTHER FROM THE DOG I FED HIM TO.
>>
WOULD BE PARADING THROUGH THE STREETS WITH MY LIVER ON THE
STICK.
>> WE WONT STOP 'TIL YOUR DEMOCRACY IS A PILE OF ASH AND
YOUR EGO IS SOOTHED!
CALL TODAY!
♪ IF YOU WANT POWER THAT'S A CINCHELY
♪ CALL THE ATTORNEYS CORNSWORTH AND PINCHLEY ♪
1-800-COUP-COUP-CACHOO!
>> Announcer: IT'S "A LATE SHOW WITH STEPHEN COLBERT."