[music playing]
It's laundry day, Gary.
Oops.
[meowing]
I'm ready.
Well, I like it so far.
Tada. [gasping]
It's the new Krusty Crew uniform.
[chuckles] I designed it myself.
Okay, this is it, SpongeBob.
Now, tell her how you really feel
about that uniform.
Okay, Squidward. Pearl...
this is the greatest uniform ever!
Fish paste.
I'm sorry, Mr. SpongeBob, but we're not expecting
another shipment of square pants for months.
Oh.
No. Nope. Ew, not these. Uh-uh.
[gasping]
Ooh.
These pants hug my body better than my own mother.
[music playing]
Oh!
Employee locker room.
Wow! Oh, your life is so glamorous.
You could be my junior assistant.
- Really?! - Sure.
There's a ton of uniforms in these metal boxes.
Check it out. Let me just get my key.
[grunting]
Put this on.
Okay!
[grunting]
Well, how do I look?
Guard-tastic!
I don't have to come here to get credits.
Now, rule number one of guarding is,
don't let visitors touch stuff.
No touchy, no feely. Eye-eye.
Rule number B: no running!
[screaming]
Single file, children, single file.
[scatting]
[gasping, horns honking]
Broken traffic light.
Who's to say my monitor duties should end
just because the bell rang?
I can be helpful anywhere.
This looks like a job for the hall monitor!
[whistling]
[music playing]
[whistling]
[music playing]
[whistling]
[music playing]
What would this town do without you, SpongeBob?
[groaning] My leg!
This hat says, "Hey, I'm number one
and I let gravity do my drinking."
This hat was made for you, boy.
You were born to wear this hat.
Ee-hee, ooh...!
A perfect fit, eh, son?
Oh, thank you, Mr. Krabs.
Thank you for bringing us together.
[sighing] How can I ever repay you?
With $10.
All I have is 5.
Well, I guess it's no deal.
I'll be right back.
[gasping]
[chuckles]
[gasping]
Mr. Krabs, I found 68 cents. But maybe you can take
the other $4.32 out of my paycheck.
What do you say?
Well, I don't know. Uh, okay!
But only 'cause you look so dashing in that hat.
Thanks, Mr. Krabs.
Don't mention it, boys. [chuckles]
What a couple of rubes.
You know, Patrick, being in a band
gives you the liberty to dress with a little more...
- How should I put this? - Yeah?
Well, with just a little more...
Go ahead, say it, SpongeBob.
You know, pizzazz.
Uh. Perhaps you didn't notice my new hairdo.
Whoa oh oh, I stand corrected.
And unlike your nasty little wig,
mine is real.
Man, how'd you grow that so fast?
Natural talent. Watch this.
[grunting]
Whoo! Yeah! I dig that fancy follicle work.
Hey, check this one out.
[grunting]
Oh, man, Squidward's not gonna wanna miss this.
[laughing]
Oh, boy, that was some party.
Oh, hey, SpongeBob. Hey, Junior.
What?
- Oh, nothing. - Oh, what a relief.
For a second, I thought you were mad at me.
Do you remember what you said to me this morning?
Something about root beer, right?
- No. - Wait, wait. Let me guess.
I give up.
Does "You can take the night off, Pal."
ring a bell?
I don't need this.
What?! Where do you think you're going?
I'm going back to work.
Work?!
It's cool. Up is down. Down is up.
It's all relative.
Relative.
Oh, wow, SpongeBob, you just blew our minds.
[music playing]
Son, how's the eviction going?
Oh, wow, you're beautiful.
[gasping] You went too deep!
You've gone full flower child. Oh, no!
What's happening, man?
[doorbell ringing]
Hello?
What do you think, Pearl?
Cleans up pretty good, doesn't he?
Well, at least no one will recognize you.
Now listen, SpongeBob, I just want to get
through this dance with my social status intact.
I want to go to the prom,
get my picture taken and I want to dance.
I want to drink punch with my friends.
And don't do that other thing you're always doing.
Uh, Pearl, we gotta get back to the limo.
A limo. Why didn't you say so?
I love limousines.
Go easy on him, lassie!
I can't afford to break in a new fry cook!
[laughing]
I can take losing the topic cards
and the phone and the punch bowl,
but I was supposed to lead the bunny hop!
This is a bunch of barnacles! I'm breaking in!
Well, well, well, what do we have here?
A burglar bunny.
Why are they doing, O'Malley?
I don't know. It's probably how he gets his kicks.
You criminals make me sick.
I'm no criminal. I live here.
I'm just throwing a party. I got locked out, I swear.
Well, why didn't you say so?
What a terrible misunderstanding.
You have a nice party now, sir.
Boy, for a second there, I thought
I was gonna be arrested for breaking into my own house.
What an ironic twist that would've been.
SpongeBob, can I borrow some bath beads?
[music playing]
SpongeBob?
Go. Run away like all the others.
No one would want a friend as ugly as I am.
Sure they would.
It makes them feel better about the way they look.
Maybe a story will cheer you up.
[music playing]
[blowing]
[music playing]
[squeaking]
Uh.
[squeaking]
Hey, Squidward, do you like my new boots?
Pretty cool, huh?
Now, I'm an official fry cook.
Uh.
[squeaking]
Uh! That squeaking is gonna drive us all crazy.
Nonsense, Squidward.
That squeaking is money to my ears.
I mean, music.
What are you doing here?
[laughing]
I just wanted to watch you blow it.
So where's your band?
Uh. They couldn't come. They... died.
Then who's that?
[screaming] That would be my band!
We're ready to perform Squidward.
Well, Squiddy,
this is exactly how I pictured your band would look.
That's his eager face.
[laughing]
You forgot your belt!
You forgot... Mermaid Man secret utility belt,
the emblem of submersible justice.
For 65 years, this belt has helped prevent
the fall of nations... and pants.
I can't believe I'm actually holding it
in my hands. Oh, I guess I should return it.
Or not. [laughing]
I could just hold on to it until after work.
All alone with Mermaid Man's belt.
I wonder what this button does.
Whoa.
The small ray.
Ee.
Oh. It sure looks a lot like home.
Hey, look, it's Gary! Hey, come here, Gary. Hey, Gary.
Wait! Don't go near him, Patrick.
Can't you see this is all a trick.
The aliens are projecting our memories
onto the environment.
They're trying to confuse us, Patrick.
So you mean to say they've taken what we thought we think
and make us think we thought our thoughts
we've been thinking our thoughts we think
we thought? I think.
Okay, but I'm not gonna fall for it.
[meowing]
Yeah!
You got him, SpongeBob. Won't Sandy be proud?
Sandy. I forgot all about her.
Oh, she's going to hate us for stealing her rocket.
But won't she feel silly when I bring her back
a real live alien? Ah, she'll love me.
Come on, Patrick, the more the merrier.
And why aren't you in uniform?
It's about time you got here!
Here you go, your majesty.
I can't drink that.
- Why not? - Are you blind?
Just look at it.
What about it?
That lemon has three seeds in it.
That's an odd number!
I can't eat anything odd numbered!
Fine, I'll just take it out.
No! No! It's already contaminated
by the bad lemon. It won't work.
Hmm. That's two things in this house that won't work.
Then go fix them.
Two things that won't work.
I changed my mind. I want soup instead.
Okay. Don't move.
Didn't you hear? They found a whole warehouse full of 'em.
They're worthless!
[laughing]
Let's give Mr. Krabs a big hand.
[laughing]
Now that's worth a million dollars.
[laughing]
- Hey, kid, wait up! - I saw him first!
I'll give you one billion dollars!
Well, that's a spirit breaker.
[crying]
What a baby.
[crying]