How do you stop getting played by men? From my years in the stripping industry, I became
pretty good at spotting players and more importantly, spotting the women who would either get played
or be completely resilient to it. In today's video, I'm going to give you 10 things that
you need to do and mindsets you need to have to never get played by men again. Stay tuned.
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How do you stop getting played by men? This is an area that I have particular personal
expertise in. With my years. As I said in the stripping industry, I was able to spot
which women were much more likely to get played. I can almost spot it like that and which women
would be completely resilient based on what we're going to talk about today, and the first
thing you've got to do, the very first thing to stop getting played is to reinforce your
life foundation. We filmed a video recently on how to build an exciting life that attracts
men and I'd really encourage you to watch that. With all my clients, the first thing
I do is I get their foundation right. I know that they won't get played by men if they
have a great life foundation. We look at their physical health, we look at their mental health,
we look at their social support, we look at their finances, we look at their career.
We look at their entire life and how it's going. Because I know that when a woman has
a solid foundation, she's a lot more resilient to getting played by men. It's pretty obvious
that if everything else isn't going so well and you meet a good guy, then you're going
to become a lot more reliant on that guy and if that guy starts playing you, he's going
to be able to mess with you a lot more. Whereas when you have that solid foundation, you're
going to be totally good with it.
Number two, take responsibility for any patterns.
So if you have had a pattern of getting played by men on a continuous basis, then what is the
common denominator there? I'm looking at her. It's you, but that's a good thing because
that means you can change it, but first you have to take responsibility for the part.
You could have played.
Number three, meet more men and different types of men. To be frankly, honest with you,
a lot of women that I saw getting played, got played because they simply didn't have
many options. When they did start to get played or when the guy's behavior started to get
dodgy, they weren't willing to drop him on his ass. When a woman has a lot of options,
when you are coming from a place of abundance with men and you're meeting a lot of men,
you're going to be much more able and much more willing to hold a man to the standards
that deep down you know you deserve, but which is sometimes a little hard to apply. In addition
to that, you want a date different types of men, especially if you've had a pattern of
getting played by men, date guys who are the total opposite to what you think is your type.
If a woman comes to me as a client and says, "I've been dating this type of guy over and
over and getting the same results," I'll have her date a guy that's the total opposite,
who treats her the total opposite way. This isn't to say you get in a relationship with
that guy, but you do date men who are completely outside your comfort zone, which if your comfort
zone involves getting played by men, is a damn good thing.
Number four, never ever assume exclusivity.
This is probably the biggest mistake that I saw getting made over and over
again by women is they assume exclusivity when it's never been stated. Expectations
get raised and they end up getting played. You never want to assume exclusivity with
any manual seeing until he says that he is actually exclusive to you. Always assume he's
dating other women until he says otherwise and you're far less likely to get played.
Number five is value YOUR exclusivity. All the focus gets put on sex and exclusivity
gets thrown to men by a lot of women as though it's useless. Here's the reality, you have
a lot more potential to meet men while you're single than he does to meet women. You have
to appreciate, you have to value that. You see, what often happens is guy starts dating
girl and they get along and three weeks later, girl stops accepting advances from other men
while guy - player is still accepting advances from other women. She ends up getting played
and it was totally preventable. Why did it happen? Because she didn't value her own exclusivity.
She gave it to a guy who wasn't reciprocating it and the result was she got played. Always
value your own exclusivity. Remember how much potential you have to meet different men while
you're single. Remember, we talked about how important it was to meet lots of men, value
that exclusivity and you're far less likely to end up getting played by men.
Number six is chase men who chase you regardless of how attractive they are or how you feel
in terms of habits that help my clients. This is one of the most powerful that stops them
getting played because it filters out all the guys who aren't putting in the effort
immediately. If you've been getting played, it's likely that you've been over investing
in men who are under investing in you. So when you start judging men first and foremost
on their effort, you immediately filter out most of those guys who are going to play you
and filter in all the gold. Now, yes, you're not going to be attracted to all these guys.
You're not going to feel it with all of them, but it only takes one to find a guy for you
that is not gonna play you and who you can fall absolutely in love with.
Number seven, always watch what men do rather than listen to what they say. Very simple
judge a man first and foremost on his actions. Players are great at talking. Men who play
will say all the right things, but when you stop thinking about what they've said and
just look at what they did, you're a lot less lucky to get played by men when you choose
your own actions based on that.
Number eight, qualify men over time. Wait and see.
A lot of women need to know now. They feel like I need to know now if he likes me, I need
to know now if he's a player, I need to know now if I should commit to him. No, you don't.
Wait and see. Qualify men over time. Players and guys who play you can usually do things
for short periods of time but they can't keep it up. When you say, "Well, I'm just going
to wait and see if he proves himself," and you take a couple of months to just assess
if he's worthy of your exclusivity, and if he's worthy of you leaving your great single
life that you built for, then you're going to be in a position where you're going to
spot things and know if you're getting played or not.
Take the time, assess guys and that's going to stop you getting played in the short term.
Number nine, keep your willingness to walk. One thing I noticed about women who get played
a lot is they lose their willingness to walk. They have it at the beginning when they very
first start dating a guy, they're willing to go back to their single life, but as they
get to know him better, as they start to feel more and more, they lose their willingness
to walk. A woman who doesn't get played is a woman who, yep, I like him, yep it's been
a couple of months, but whoa, he's dropped his game, and I'm still willing to walk. If
you keep your willingness to walk, if you're constantly updating your assessment of a man
to make sure he's still putting in effort, et cetera, make sure he still meets your standards,
then you're far less likely to get played.
Number 10, and I cannot emphasize this one enough, is trust your instincts. You are a
lot able, better able to read the average man than he is able to read you. Your brain
is better wired to read social situations and dynamics than his. If something feels
off to you, trust your instincts. It probably is if he's being dodgy about his phone, if
he's not really explaining where he is, if something just feels off to you. Trust that
feeling. A lot of times when a woman is getting played, it's cause she's not trusting her
instincts and taking her actions based on that. So if it doesn't feel right to you,
it's probably not. And particularly if you're exclusive to that guy, keep that willingness
to walk, assess your feelings and if it doesn't feel right to you, trust those instincts.
Be willing to communicate to him, but if his communication is not satisfactory, walk the hell away.
Stop being exclusive, end things. That is how to stop yourself getting played by men.
There's 10 ways right throughout the video. Re-watch this video. If you found yourself
getting played, watch this video a number of times. Apply these mindsets. This is how
you stop getting played by men. I learned this from watching thousands, tens of thousands
of women over many years as to what made them resilient and almost impossible for men to
play. If you apply these mindsets, I guarantee you the guys that want to play, you will go
off and find an easier target. Well, that's it. That's the video. Thank you so much for
watching! I hope you enjoyed. Let me know your thoughts, comments, questions, everything.
Put it below and make sure as well, you give the video a thumbs up and subscribe to the
channel. Hit the little bell, so that you get notifications as well when new videos
are out. Thank you for watching! I'll see you in the next video very soon, and do not
let yourself get played by men at all in the future.
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