Satsang with Mooji productions
a moment of awakening
[music]
Nothing happens
[silence]
[Questioner] I started to tell you before,
at the beginning of this retreat,
there was a lot of shame and a feeling of rejection.
All that stuff. Failure.
That was looked into. Very strong, very strong feelings.
'Who is experiencing this?'
All that could be found were feelings, sensations, images from the past.
As I told you, I lost interest in looking at that,
and was just looking deeply within.
Mind was like, 'You're bad, you did it wrong'.
[Mooji] Yes.
[Q.] And then it cut in all these images
of what I had done in the past.
As I told you, it came that nothing happened.
[Mooji] OK.
[Q.] The mind was like, 'But it did, we have pictures'.
[Mooji] [laughs]
[Q.] You know, in the form of memories. [M.] Yes, yes.
[Q.] And there are credit card receipts at home,
and piles of books on the table.
And it just came that none of that happened,
from that non-location place of looking and seeing.
[Mooji] Yes, yes.
[Mooji] And if someone were to say, 'Listen, you are just pretending.
Nothing happened because maybe you're in denial.'
[Q.] Well, that's mind.
[Mooji] Very great, look at that. [laughter]
[Q.] That came too. That came too.
[Mooji] Aha, you caught that little rat.
[Q.] Yes, that was something I've heard you say a few times,
'Nothing happened, nothing is happening'. [Mooji] Yes, yes.
[Q.] There was no level of understanding
or resonance or experience of that.
It just seems so foreign. And on the level of mind it's still ...
But I'm just not going there. [Mooji] Yes, yes.
[Q.] Just watching that movie today,
when that ended, I was, like, 'What was that?' [laughter]
[Mooji] Really?
[Q.] Yes, I was, like, I need an explanation,
and I could see the tendency to go outside for meaning.
[Mooji] Aha.
[Q.] So I went within and just saw what the meaning was for me.
And it was, 'Whose meaning is that?'
And what came was, 'Nothing. Nothing.'
The first insight was that nothing had happened.
Then I looked, and I'm like, 'Is anything happening now?'
And there was nothing happening.
[Mooji] There was no response?
No responding to what happened in the movie?
[Q.] There was. [M.] Yes, yes.
[Q.] But that was seen to just be a motion playing
against the backdrop of that unchanging awareness.
[M.] Look at that. So what you're saying is that,
of course, the play of emotion can take place.
The sense of this and thatness can occur.
But that doesn't amount to something, from the place of awareness.
Is that what you are saying?
[Q.] Mm. [M.] Good heavens. [laughter]
[Q.] And I saw that if I want to go back and think about certain actions,
I feel like nothing really has changed this week.
I'm the same. Nothing has changed, in a good way.
That which I am ... it's not touched.
It's not participating in activities.
[Mooji] So if someone, if a voice came and said,
'You're very cold and unfeeling'.
[Q.] Feeling is there, but it's appropriate feeling.
I mean, I don't have to worry about that.
[Mooji] Yes, yes. [laughs] So you're not suppressing?
You're not sitting on things? You're not sitting down on things?
You're not holding? You're not sitting on a volcano? [laughter]
[Q.] No. No, I mean this.
In the past, I really enjoyed the experience of spaciousness, emptiness.
But I think what I'm seeing now is that there was still ...
there was someone there enjoying that.
[Mooji] Yes, yes. [laughs] Look at that.
[Q.] And this week, I've had the taste of allowing almost ...
having all sorts of the seeming opposite come in, but not touch that.
[Mooji] I'm lost for words with you.
[Q.] So am I. [tears, laughter]
[Q.] This might be a bit of a story,
but what the movie brought up for me
was that we just ... I'll speak for myself.
I just live in a paradise, already.
And there has been unappreciation, I guess,
for, I'll just say, husband and child.
But I saw that the mind was coming is,
'Oh yes, now I know what to do when I get home'.
But that scene at the end of the movie,
of everything washing away in that raging river,
it was seen to be husband, child, sense of self, past, all just rushing.
But yet, you know, What am I? Who am I?
And that was still part of the 'nothing happening'.
It's just, seeming appearances. [cries]
[Mooji] Are these tears of sadness here?
[Q.] I'm just kind of, I'm deeply touched.
[Mooji] Yes, yes, yes. Yes, yes.
Very great, very great.
[Q.] Thank you for dismissing me off the stage Sunday night.
[Mooji] [laughs] Very great.
[music]
Avoid complacency. Through firm Self-Enquiry,
Ego, in its myriad aspects, is finally exposed as unreal.
[silence]
The true Self, free from distraction,
now recognises itself as the flawless Reality.