(Thump Thump Thump Thump ahh, Thump Thump Thump Thump ahh) (Playing with spoons music.)
This week's Music Monday will have you wondering what the hell "Maxstep" means with Younique's "Maxstep".
(Click on the "Watch Maxstep" icon in the upper left corner)
So, I was really excited to hear about this dance group being put together.
Younique Unit is like an SM fan's wet dream.
It's a superstar roster including my all-time favorite Kpop dancer ever: Taemin, who I will gush about more later.
(sound of a harp) However, I was a little bit disappointed in the lack of females in this group. (Hyoyeon appears at 2:27 secs...)
(It's a 3:37 second song) It was more like a special guest appearance rather than a full member of the group.
What about adding an F(x) member or the super obvious choice of BoA?
Maybe they were just too busy to join the group, but it kind of felt like another guy dance crew with a female addition near the end.
As for the the song itself, we felt like it was odd.
It sounds really like old school SM music, like old old Super Junior or TVXQ.
It's all over the place, starting with the distorted dubstep to a heavy guitar riff to a totally different beat,
changed during the dubstep breakdown during the end.
I could barely hear the singing with the sound effects of the crowd cheering over most of it.
I just kind of felt like, what is there for me to sing along to?
When I listen to SM songs, I want to shout out something like, Sexy, Free, and Single, I'm ready to bingo!
(Sings) I'm so curious, yeah! Electric nananana.
With this song, though, there's nothing that catches you. There's no sing along ability.
I mean, we understand since this is meant to be a dance video. And it's not so much about SM making a video to accompany a song they're promoting,
it's more like they're making background music to accompany a dance video.
Now, don't get us wrong, it's not bad background music.
it definitely fits the vibe of the dance much more than, for example, our theme music.
Our theme music's not very good for dancing to it. Or is it? (Dramatic Dun nuh)
(Thump Thump Thump Thump ahh, Thump Thump Thump Thump ahh) (Playing with spoons music.)
(TL;DR Intro Song)
(Intro to the WANK music)
(Open The Happy Intro Music)
(No, definitely not good to dance to.) (Dramatic Dun nuh) [Sp] Or is it?
(Open The Happy Intro Music)
No, and on that note, what the f*ck does Maxstep even mean? (bleep)
Maxstep. So many words to choose from in the English vocabulary. Why choose Maxstep? Why?
[Simon sings] Captain Purple Line!!!!!!!!!!!!
[S] (muffled) Are you to figure this out? [M] What?
[S] I said I heard that you need some help with Maxstep.
[M] Yeah, it doesn't make any sense at all. [S] Shhhh. (twinkling sound)
It's ok. Allow me to explain this for you, (Smacks Martina's butt.) little one.
Maxstep is a mathematical term for computers, which predicts the boundness of size to provide convergence for the main values
of the adaptive co-effiecient filters. [M] The what?
That's still... [S] So, in other words Younique Unit cannot be contained by anything.
[M] How did you even come to that conclusion? That didn't help at all.
[S] And in the wise words of my friend, your skin is of the largest nature. Captain Purple, On!!!!!!
Did you just call me fat? Um, Simon. (starting to cry)
Uh. (Crickets chirping) That was new... and uncomfortable.
So, my assumption is that step means dancing and max means very good, so Maxstep
is a Konglish way of saying: we are awesome dancers, but on it's own, it's nonsense.
I mean, is there even Minstep?
(Whispers) Minstep. (Martina barks) Too much movement. (Simon cries)
Also, whenever I think of Maxstep, I can only think of one thing: Max step.
I think of TVXQ. How could SM have a song called "Maxstep" without "Max" in it. That's just absurd.
Just imagine if it had a different name.
Ok guys, let's take it from the top. "Taestep" one more time.
I think we're ready to go for today, right? Ok, let's get into the move.
[Taemin] What the hell is "Taestep"? [M] Oh, ah, Taemin, ahhh?
[Taemin] How could include a Taestep dance and not include Taemin?
[M] Well, it doesn't stand for Taemin. It stands for "tazzer".
Like, we're so electric, we dance with electric like style.
[T] You're a dirty liar, and we're not friends anymore. Soy un dorito.
[M] Ahhhh, god. Sensitive. [T] Soy un...
Oh, god...he's doing his attack. [T] ...dorito! [M] No!
[T] Take it. [M] No! [T] Soy un dorito. [M] Uhh. [T] Take it! [M] I don't want to hear about this!
(Spoon playing music) (The dance)
So, let's talk about the dance of this video since that's what is the most important here.
I got to say, watching this video has utterly confirmed my bias towards Taemin and Shinee.
Now, I don't want to offend anyone here, I totally know that everyone in this group is extremely talented,
and much better dancers than I could ever dream to be.
But I think that if you watched this video as closely as I did, I actually went through frame by frame for some of the dance moves,
I can confidently say that Taemin is definitely the greatest dancer in Younique Unit.
His moves are so crisp. I was actually disappointed to see that some of the other members were not really on cue with each other
or just kind of half-heartedly doing the dance move. (Taemin punches like he is REALLY boxing.) Taemin looks like a martial artist.
He's crisp, quick, passionate, and head and shoulders above the rest. (Some members are just swinging their arms.)
I think the main difference that I'm getting at is that everyone in the group is very very talented, (His feet are totally tucked.)
but Taemin is talented and gifted. There's just something about the way he moves. Look at these, look at these scenes.
He just like rolls, and he's just like uhhhh, and he's crispy. Gifted.
(More spoon playing music) (The English)
As for the English of the song, I'm giving this a...3.5 out of 5.
Maxstep. It's the chorus of the song, and it's bullsh*t, (Cow bell) so I'm docking it a mark.
And also, there's that whole "This is specialist HY".
How about saying, maybe, special guest or maybe dance leader, but a specialist?
Does she have her PhD? What does this even mean?
(What Specialist Hyoyeon does in her free time)
(Sounds of groaning) [S] Hold on, miss! I'll get you a doctor! Somebody please call a doctor. She's going into labor. Anybody please!
This is Specialist HY. (Weird high pitch voice) (Yo yo yo) Out of my way. [S] Oh. [Hyoyeon grunts out] And push!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[S] I'm sick. (Crying baby) [HY] Congratulations, it's a baby boy! [S] Are you sure about that? [HY] Uhhhhh.
[S] Hold on, sir! I'm gonna call somebody. Somebody help, this man is really sick and on the ground!
This is Specialist HY. (Weird high pitch voice) Yo yo yo! [HY] Out of my way, his appendix is about to explode! [S] Is that a bottle opener?
[HY] Unghhhhh. (Slice of flesh) Unghhhhh. (Tears flesh) [S] Disgusting. [HY] You'll be ok, now sir!
[S] Eeee! Uhhhh! Eeeeeee! Why? Arrrgg. This is specialist HY. (Sounds of skidding to a halt) [HY] Yo yo yo! Give me that. Unghh!
Oh, so close SM (Entertainment). So close. At least you're out of the negatives now.
(Even more spoon playing music) (The showdown)
Last week we asked you, who was the better actress?
I put quotes around the word "better". Lee Hi in "1,2,3,4" or Park Bom in "Don't Cry".
And the landslide victory winner goes to....Park Bom!
But, I'm a little confused because does it mean she's the worst actress since she's won the award?
Or does it mean that she's better at acting than Lee Hi is?
I can't really tell because I feel like the two of them are kind of equal. Lee Hi's kind of awkward, but Park Bom has no emotion.
You know, I love you, 2NE1, but Park Bom, you need to work on the emotion side.
For this week's showdown we asked you, which member do you think should have been included in Younique Unit?
Max or BoA? Leave your dancy votes in the dancy comments and we'll announce the dancing winner next week.
Also, if there is a video you want to see us do for next week's Music Monday head on over to our website,
put in your votes there.
Whoever wins Saturday at midnight, we wind up reviewing.
And lastly, don't forget to like and to favorite this video
and to subcribe for more Music Mondays.
Take it away, Maxtime Spudgy!
Thanks for watching Kpop Music Mondays of EYK! (The end of the spoon playing music)