Merry Christmas horror fans!
Happy holidays to you all, whether you’re watching this video around a warm, toasty
fire - or eating a steak and lobster feast with a large glass of Scotch, or is that just
me?
Either way I’d like to extend my sincerest and heartfelt joy at this most wonderful time
of the year.
And what better way to share it - than by taking a look at the bizarre yet surprisingly
decent festive season genre bending mash-up slashers in horror cinema.
Hello horror fans - and Merry Christmas to you all.
Once again, welcome back to the scariest and - just for one day, the cheeriest channel
on YouTube - Top 5 Scary Videos.
As always, I’ll be your horror host Jack Finch - as we take a look at the Top 5 Scariest
Christmas Horror Monsters.
Roll the clip.
Alright guys - we’re making a list, we’re checking it twice, and we’re about to find
out who’s been naughty or nice.
Well, what did you expect?
This is a list based channel after all - it’s what we do.
In all seriousness, Christmas themed slasher films are a dime a dozen - especially in B-Movie
territory.
It’s hard to take a fat guy in a red suit with an axe seriously at the best of times
- but during the festive season - horror cinema takes it to a whole new level.
Ho ho ho-horror.
See what I did there?
Well - let’s take a look at all those films that you can replace It’s A Wonderful Life
with.
Kicking off at Number 5 - The Krampus
Of course!
You know this guy.
It’s the Krampus!
The half-goat, half-demon horned terrifying monstrosity from Austro-Bavarian folklore.
He’s one of Saint Nicholas’ brave companions - who act as an evil foil to the jolly, gift-giving
nature of old Santa across central Europe, particularly the Bavarian regions.
They’re like the death metal version of Santa - and they’re pretty spooky.
Well - with the 2015 release of the dark, comedic slasher - Krampus - directed by Mike
Dougherty - we got to see him in all of his terrifying glory.
If you haven’t seen it - Krampus is great fun, and so surprisingly creepy that it kind
of takes you off guard.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s a cut and shut movie - and there’s nothing more to it than
a terrified family being chased around town on Christmas Eve by a ravaneous, unrelenting
demon from Alpine folklore.
But if that’s not exactly what you want this Christmas Eve - I don’t know what else
to tell you.
Swinging in at Number 2 - Sinterklaas
What do you get when you imagine Santa Claus - not as the jolly, blushing, bearded sweetheart
of an old man - but instead, a skeletal Catholic Saint on horseback hellbent on enacting revenge
against the society that’s turned its back against him.
Well - you get Saint.
Or, Sint - in its original Dutch - based on the the Netherlands folklore depiction of
Sinterklaas, the patron saint of children.
I’m not going to lie - this film isn’t much more than 90 odd minutes of slasher death
scenes - but if that’s all you want this Christmas Eve, you won’t be disappointed.
And there are a few genuinely creepy moments where the demonic Sinterklaas truly shines.
This film actually stirred up such a fuss that parents across the Netherlands tried
to get the poster banned from public areas - believing that small children would misinterpret
the mutilated, demonic looking Sinterklaas - with the actual, happy version of Santa
Claus.
They’re not the same guys - Santa’s got a sleigh.
And Sinterklaas slays.
Sorry - I had to get that one in.
Coming in next at Number 3 - Harry Stadling, Christmas Evil
Oh man, is this film creepy - and Brandon Maggart’s depiction of a psychopathic killer
obsessed with the idea of Santa Claus is definitely the kind of vibe to get your skin crawling
this Christmas Eve.
Written and directed by Lewis Jackson - and originally released under the title You Better
Watch Out - Christmas Evil highlights everything that is wrong with a grown man still obsessed
with old Saint Nick, who then takes up the responsibility of dishing out gifts and presents
to those that have been good - and then, well, murders those that have been bad - with a
hatchet - and on one occasion, a Christmas tree star.
It’s interesting to think that a Christmas based slasher film could stand toe to toe
with the likes of Halloween and Friday the 13th - and even more so, with the fact that
Christmas Evil actually addresses some incredibly tough themes.
From a psychological perspective, this film is a successful depiction of a warped mind.
From a moral perspective, this film is a social commentary on the gaping gulf between the
rich and the poor - and the misinterpretation of charity and good will.
Yeah, pretty lofty themes for a Santa Slasher film - but against all odds, it works - and
it’s definitely one of the creepiest Christmas films you’ll ever watch.
You better watch out.
Next up at our Number 2 spot - Billy Chapman
In regard to horror, Silent Night, Deadly Night is arguably the greatest Cult Christmas
slasher ever made.
Which is a sentence I could never imagine myself saying.
And - the really, really interesting thing with this film is how much controversy it
stirred up - because by today’s standards, this film is a walk in the park compared to
some of the gore for the sake of gore movies we’ve had.
Still though - that doesn’t detract from the fact that it’s alive in all of it’s
Red-Suit and Beard wearing Santa Slasher glory.
I’m not sure whether Silent Night, Deadly night is still getting dragged through the
mud by critics holding a grudge - but really, it’s the perfect demonstration of what horror
can do when it doesn’t take itself too seriously.
That is not to detract from the character of Billy Chapman though, who is equal parts
gory and equal parts insanely entertaining.
He’s the same ilk of Harry Stadling in Christmas Evil - which, may I add, didn’t get any
hate from critics for what is essentially the same film - although Billy Chapman is
- well, let’s say he’s a more direct version.
Literally, this film is 88 minutes of Billy Chapman dressed as Santa Claus, grunting PUNISHMENT
while swinging his axe at people.
Merry Christmas - what’s all the fuss about?
And finally - at our Number 1 spot - Rare Exports
Ahh - this film is actually incredible.
If not completely insane - and quintessentially Finnish.
It also features one of the greatest mythological Christmas monsters - the Joulupukki - or the
ancient version of Santa Claus in Finnish folklore - which literally translates to Christmas
Goat - or a horned demon that whips misbehaving children and boils them in a cauldron.
Although - we kind of don’t get to see it in all of its glory - it's the build up in
this film that makes it all worthwhile.
Plus - terrifying elves - which are actually skinny old men with beards that gnaw reindeer
to the bone.
That’s all the spoilers you’ll get from me - because Rare Exports is definitely worth
a watch, whether you’re feeling in the festive spirit or not.
It’s actually a great film - and reminiscent of the 30 Days of Night graphic novel - just
the Christmas version.
It’s a frantic mix of black comedy, Pagan iconography - more mythological monsters than
you can shake a stick at - all wrapped up in a horror movie on overdrive.
What more could you ask for this Christmas?
Well - there we have it horror fans - I sincerely hope that you’ve enjoyed this Christmas
based list - what better way to enjoy the festive season!
Wherever you are - whatever you do, I hope these 9 or so minutes have added a little
more Christmas cheer to your day.
It’s been an awesome year guys - thanks to all of you horror fans, new and old - so
make sure to give us a thumbs up and ding that subscribe bell - because why not, it’s
Christmas.
As always, I’ve been your host Jack Finch - you’ve been watching this Top 5 Scary
Videos - and until next time, you have a very, merry Christmas.
Take it easy.