And she went to hug me, but because my nerves, my nervous system was going insane
when she did it felt like fire, so that's like my first memory of like, something's not quite right.
So my mum was an actress, and when she was seven months pregnant with me
she performed a one-woman show about pregnancy called 'From Here to Maternity'
and so, yeah when I was a seven month foetus I was onstage each night.
Yeah right, so was it any surprise when you came out that
when you said to mum and dad, 'You know what, I want to be an actor.'
Were they even remotely shocked?
I don't think so, I mean I don't remember a time in my life when I didn't want to.
I was like a very gregarious, outgoing, flamboyant child who would constantly be like -
There's footage of me as a two year old dancing to the Little Mermaid soundtrack on repeat.
The classics, though.
- It was amazing - Right?
And I didn't even know what drag was but I did Spice Girls for the years one to three
and I did Ginger Spice obviously.
Naturally. I can see you as Ginger.
I actually didn't realise at the time that ginger meant red head, I thought it was like a spice.
Great double entendre.
So, at the age of eleven a PE teacher notices you favour your left-hand side.
What goes through your head at that moment?
I mean, as an eleven year old I didn't really have any concept of what it meant.
My mum had a really strong gut instinct that something was wrong, and she took me to a number of specialists
and then they found a tumour filling 90% of my spinal cord cavity from C1 to C7.
And I went to have a biopsy test to see if it was cancerous or not.
And I went in and there were complications with the biopsy, I became quadriplegic
so paralysed from the neck down, and I spent six months in hospital.
When you woke up from the biopsy, what was your first sense that something had not gone to plan?
So basically I came out of the biopsy, I was fine.
I think I came out at about 3pm, and then at 6pm my right arm started getting pins and needles
and then my right leg, then my left leg, then my left arm and then function was being lost
and then over 12 hours, I slowly became a quadriplegic.
Then my sister who was five at the time, she was there and she went to hug me
but because my nerves, my nervous system was going insane, when she did it felt like fire.
So then I screamed, and she started crying right away
so that was my first memory of something's not quite right.
But then we went to Sydney to get second opinions and you know, see what we should do.
And a lot of them were saying that the spinal cord is obviously very compromised and needs to -
The tumour's inoperable, and we don't want anyone to operate on it but it needs to be removed.
But then Charlie Teo the amazing neurosurgeon said, 'I can operate on it.'
And he did, and he removed the entire tumour.
My disability has just been the paralysis from that, from the complications of the biopsy.
After the initial biopsy, I was quadriplegic. But where I got to after the six months of rehabilitation
is that I have full function back in my left arm, I have full function in my left leg.
I have partial paralysis in my right leg, and then my right arm is almost completely paralysed.
So I can feel hot, cold, pain, pressure, but I can't feel texture or light touch.
Oh okay.
So I can't really tell what's holding me, but I can feel something is holding me.
All throughout high school I used a mobility scooter.
So there's a standard amount of pressure that comes with being a teenager
and everyone struggles with that.
But what you're talking about is something that has multiple layers on top of it.
I guess I'm trying to understand what you think the long-term impacts on your personality
on how you interact with people are out of that.
It's like the stuff I've gone through, especially in terms of acting and stuff
I gave it up when I became that age as well, because even though as a kid it was all I wanted to do
and it wasn't a far off concept - I was auditioning for kid's TV shows
but when I became disabled, I really felt like, well now this isn't a feasible career path.
And so, I can't do it and just to make matters worse
when I went back to school it was the same time I realised I was gay.
I realised when I was 12 or 13 that I was gay, and I very consciously decided to act straight.
And I remember there was a cute boy in year seven, who I won't publicly name.
But I remember I had -
Probably for the best.
I had like a crazy crush on him. He was just that -
That guy.
He was just the 12 year old who got attractive, to other 12 year olds.
This is not going well.
No, no it's going fine.
And then there was the pretty blonde girl who he was 'dating' as much as you do when you're 12.
And I remember seeing them together, and because my body no longer felt like my own
I felt like, there was this sense of, 'Oh if I look like her, then he wouldn't know that it was me.'
And he would look at me the way he was looking at her, and he'd want to kiss me like he wants to kiss her.
He would want me in the same way.
At the time I wasn't like, I'm going to make a movie about this.
But in hindsight, that was totally the germ and genesis for my feature film.
Which is about a gay, disabled teenage boy who has a full-body transplant into the body of a beautiful woman
so he can make his straight best friend fall in love with him.
Who's 17, not 12.
Again, probably for the best.
Probably for the best.
You had ruled out acting.
Yeah.
It was only two years into writing it, maybe even three, that I even decided
you know what? If I'm ever going to act, then this role is based on me, there's no one better to play this role.
I'm still hot enough to play a 17 year old, it's fine.
The other interesting thing about that is that even now when we talk about disabled people on screen
by and large, those roles are played by abled people.
Very by and large. There's also an issue in that the dominant narrative that we tell about disabled people
is from an ablest perspective of an abled person imagining how terrible it would be.
Yeah.
If I became disabled, and how I'd 'overcome' my disability out the other end.
Which is a really, it's a very dramatic interesting one that wins a lot of Oscars
but it's not the entire disabled experience.
And yet weirdly though, this conversation will adhere to that arc, in a way.
Totally, absolutely.
But I mean, for me to be able to do what I've done has never been a case of overcoming my disability.
Often those narratives are 'I will defeat my disability to be able to do this thing.'
The only reason I can do this thing is because of accepting and embracing of it.
What is the representation of disability that you've seen onscreen that just made you furious?
Mm, that's a good question.
In Glee, I think it's Artie the wheelchair user.
There was an episode I remember seeing, and the character was in love with the blonde cheerleader
and he said, "Oh my dick still works."
Being a teenager, who not only has the visible stuff but also is incontinent and impotent
it's really hard to ever imagine that you could ever have intimate relationships.
Biologically, would another person be able to be aroused by my body?
I remember I used to go to bed each night and the two things I most wanted to change about myself
was one, I didn't want to be gay and two, I didn't want to have to wear diapers.
I would wake up every morning like hoping something would change.
What was the moment when you realised that you could have intimate relations
that somebody else could be aroused by your body?
You are still a sexual being.
For the longest time, like I didn't lose my virginity until I was 21.
And that was like a revelatory moment.
Once realising that people could be attracted to me, I really went to town.
What would 12 year old Daniel make of this film?
Just stepping into school for the first time, feeling that sense of isolation
what would he have made of this film?
I made this film for 12 year old Daniel, and so like I hope it would make 12 year old Daniel feel seen
and less alone, and also give him hope for what his life will be.
I guess that's the power of filmmaking, particularly cinema is about giving yourself someone else's eyes.
Totally. The more people can not only intellectually understand but emotionally empathise with other lives
then the more, I feel the less judgemental we'll be, the more accepting and embracing we'll be.
Daniel, you are an absolute pleasure to talk to.
Not at all, thank you.
I really appreciate your time.
Thank you so much.