hi i'm vanessa from speak english with
vanessa calm
what do native english speakers really
say in daily conversation let's talk
about it recently during daily
conversation i've noticed that a lot of
the same phrases come up again and again
and i think that even in different
cultures these same situations happen in
conversation i want to help you use the
best most natural phrases so today we're
going to talk about 20 phrases that are
essential for daily conversation these
phrases fit into five different
categories someone tells you about
changing plans someone tells you
something surprising someone invites you
somewhere you want to tell or ask
someone something briefly or you want to
wish someone well so let's start with
the first category which is what can you
say when someone tells you about
changing plans recently our babysitter
told us that she had already scheduled
something on the same day that she told
us she could come to our house and watch
our two-year-old thankfully I didn't
really have something planned for that
time that she was gonna come I just
wanted some free time so what could I
have told her in that situation she's
changing our plans and she feels kind of
bad I'm so sorry I forgot that I already
had this other thing scheduled what can
I say to her don't worry about it no
worries no problem no biggie things
happen I could have said all five of
these in fact let's go through each of
them I used don't worry about it because
she was pretty apologetic that she had
to change her plans with us and I don't
want her to worry about causing us any
discomfort don't worry about it
it's no problem no worries no biggie
those are pretty casual expressions that
are common in daily conversation what
about that last one things happen
what is things it means situations we're
all human I think
it's human to double-booked sometimes to
forget you at other plans so these
situations happen occasionally things
happen don't worry about it it's not a
big deal another common expression is
things come up but this wouldn't have
been appropriate in the situation with
the babysitter because things come up
means that some situations happen
unexpectedly maybe your mom's car breaks
down and you have to take her to work so
you can't come and babysit like you said
you would okay that's an unexpected
situation things come up you know no
biggie things come up but for the
babysitter she just forgot that she
double-booked
so this didn't arise unexpectedly it was
just something that she forgot but if
there is some unexpected situation you
can say things come up it happens no
biggie
let's go into the next category what can
you say when someone tells you something
surprising a couple years ago my
brother-in-law was searching for a job
as an actuary he'd been searching for a
job for a year all over the US and I
knew that it was a big process for him
it was something that he really wanted
to do but it was tough to find a job
especially a starting position but one
day he got two job offers in the same
day it was amazing
one job offer was in Richmond Virginia
and one was in Pittsburgh Pennsylvania
where my brother-in-law and my
sister-in-law are both originally from
so now if they had a choice which one
were they gonna take which city were
they gonna move to what could I have
said in that situation when he
surprisingly got a job offer and a
second job offer in the same day what no
way whoa really how do you feel about
that all four of these sentences it's
key to have a positive tone of voice
when you're using them when I said what
did you hear this kind of uplifted tone
what I didn't say what if I said it with
that negative tone it can have a
completely different meaning same with
the others
you could say no way with a smile on
your face you're surprised and excited
no way you've got two job offers but if
you want to say this in a negative way
no way do you see how that really
changes the tone and the feel of this
sentence same with the next one whoa
really that uplifted tone in my voice oh
really I'm so excited for you
but we could say this negatively whoa
really you're questioning this oh really
I don't think that's a good idea well
really but I didn't say it like that to
my brother-in-law because I wanted to
show excitement whoa really
the last question how do you feel about
that is a little bit ambiguous because
he had two offers two different places
two choices and if for the first time in
a year he actually could choose where
his family was gonna move that's a big
decision so I wanted to know what his
feelings were how do you feel about that
Wow now it's real instead of just this
job search this is real life you
actually are gonna go somewhere and get
a different job how do you feel about
that if you wanted to say it in a more
negative way change the tone of your
voice how do you feel about that
especially emphasizing that at the end
how do you feel about that hmm it's a
little bit more serious if you just use
a more serious tone of voice let's go
into the next category of common daily
expressions which is when someone
invites you somewhere I recently had a
baby and as you can imagine life is busy
and hectic right now and I can't really
go out and just do stuff as easily as I
used to be able to do it especially in
this period right now right after having
the baby before the baby was born I
often took my two-year-old three or four
times a week to go see some friends it's
good for him to play with other kids but
it was also good for me to be able to
spend time with my friends who are their
parents
but now when someone says hey Vanessa do
you want to go to the park this
afternoon I might have a slightly
different answer at least for sure
time period while I'm still learning
about my new life what can I say in that
situation I hate to miss out but I'm
really tired today or but I don't think
I can go I hate to miss out but and then
you need to say that clear statement I
can't go but I'm tired but I'm too busy
I hate to miss out you don't want to
miss out on the fun but something else
has happened or you could say I'd love
to but I'm really tired today
I'd love to so we're using hate and love
but it's also important that we include
the final part of the sentence I hate to
miss out but I'm tired I'd love to but
I'm tired what if I actually could go
what can you say sure sounds good or
sure sounds good to me
this is a very clear casual way to
respond yeah I can go sure sounds good
sounds good to me
or if you have a specific event or maybe
you're at work and you can't get to the
invited event at a specific time that
they want you to be there you could say
I get off at 2:00 but I can get there by
2:30 I get off this means get off work I
get off at 2:00 but I can get there
we're using get in both sides of the
senate's but I can get there by 2:30 by
here is saying the minimum time I'm not
gonna get there at 2:15 it would be
shocking if I got there at 2:00 o'clock
because I get off it too but I can get
there by 2:30 that's the average time
that I'll probably arrive but I can get
there by 2:30 just a quick note if you
have ever studied British English I
often hear British English speakers say
I can't be bothered if someone invites
you to something a British English
speaker might decline by saying I can't
be bothered in the u.s. that this is
extremely strange to say and it also
feels rude so the word bothered means
I'm annoyed that you asked me or this is
irritating to me if some that person is
familiar with British English
expressions maybe they won't feel like
you're being rude but I recommend in the
US do not say I can't be bothered
you might hear this in British English
but in the u.s. don't use this to
decline an invitation I can't be
bothered it is not an Americanism it
sounds quite odd in the u.s. alright
let's go to our next category what
should you do when you want to tell or
ask someone something briefly well some
people just live with their husband some
people raise kids together some people
raise kids together and run a business
together like us so as you can imagine
we have to communicate a lot about
pretty much every level of our lives
about what we're eating for every meal
who's watching our kids when who's
working on what when different creative
ideas about the business we have to
communicate about a lot so I often ask
my husband hey can I tell you something
really quick hey can I tell you
something really quick if he's involved
in another task I don't want to assume
that he can easily switch to whatever
I'm thinking about so I want to
introduce it with this question hey can
I ask you something really quick hey can
I tell you something really quick and
maybe his answer is oh no I'm doing
something can you talk to me in 10
minutes that's fine but if I just
launched right in and said hey what do
you think about this his brain might be
on a completely different track doing
something with our kids or maybe doing
something with work so it's good to
introduce this you can also use this in
a workplace situation in a typical
office if you have two co-workers who
are talking together and you need to
tell one of them something briefly you
could use this as kind of a polite
interruption hey can I tell you
something really quick it means they can
continue their conversation in five
seconds but you just want to tell that
person something really quick on the
other hand in small talk when you want
to ask someone briefly about some
recent event like a holiday Christmas or
an interview or an exam or the weekend
you can just simply say how'd your
Christmas go how the exam go how the
interview go
how'd your weekend go how'd plus the
event go you're usually looking for a
simple answer like oh it was great I had
a nice time
Oh was too short some kind of quick
answer for small talk I don't recommend
using this for something that you know
is gonna be long and complicated I'd be
a little bit surprised if a native
English speaker said just kind of in
small talk hey how'd your birth go if
you have ever experienced birth or been
around it that is a long complicated
story that is also quite emotional so
it's not really for quick small talk
conversations maybe in the grocery store
in these type of situations you're going
to want to have simpler questions like
hey how do we can go
hey how'd your holidays go great this
kind of short small talk question
another quick note do not say We Need to
Talk or I want to talk with you this is
the most scary sentence to any English
speaker if you said to me Vanessa We
Need to Talk whoa
I feel like some I've done something
terrible what did I do
I'm in trouble I'm either gonna get
fired you're gonna break up with me
something awful that I've done that I
didn't mean to do has happened so be
very cautious if you are upset with
someone and you want them to feel
extremely nervous send them a text
message that says We Need to Talk
oh they probably won't be able to focus
on anything else for the rest of the day
so be careful use this in the correct
way or just don't use it at all instead
you can just interrupt a conversation
quickly and say hey can I tell you
something really quick no problem
but if you say We Need to Talk or do you
have a minute to talk it's gonna make
someone feel really nervous so be
cautious about that statement let's go
to our final category
which is wishing someone well I find
myself wishing people well a lot in
daily life maybe it's when they're about
to go on a new date when they have a job
interview or when they're just doing
something simple like taking their two
kids to the grocery store hope it goes
well there's a couple different
sentences that you can use to wish
someone well the most simple is have a
good time at the lake have a good
interview have a good time at the
grocery store have a good you're wishing
them well or you could be more
straightforward and say hope your
interview goes well hope your date goes
well we often cut out the subject I just
to be a little more casual hope your
interview goes well you could say I hope
your interview goes well but it feels a
little bit more serious if you're just
saying goodbye to your friend you've
been talking about they have an
interview coming up and then you're
saying goodbye it's more common to say
hope your interview goes well instead of
I hope your interview goes well it's
much more serious I hope your interview
goes well it's a little more serious
when you add the subject or you might
say fingers crossed this is usually
accompanied with this kind of crossing
fingers with your middle and your
pointer finger gesture you could use one
fingers crossed
or you might use two fingers crossed if
they say okay I'm about to go to my
interview I hope it goes well fingers
crossed
or if you are taking your two children
to the grocery store and you're a little
bit worried that things might get crazy
one of your friends might say fingers
crossed it's gonna be tough but you got
this and that's our next expression you
got this you got this
it doesn't mean you received some kind
of package it just means you can do this
you got this you got this or you can say
don't sweat it
don't sweat it sweat is the liquid that
comes from your face when you're hot or
when you're nervous and this often
happens when you have a big situation so
you need to say don't sweat it
you can do it you got this we often
combine these together when I film these
YouTube lessons it's my husband who
watches our two-year-old an hour
newborn and the first time that he
watched both of them alone by himself
I said don't sweat it you got this you
can do it don't sweat it
it's great to combine them to wish
someone well in a extreme situation this
isn't really extreme but in some new
situation whoo that was a lot of daily
expressions now I have a question for
you let me know in the comments what
would you say if your friend said I hate
that I can't come to your party I hate
that I can't come to your party hmm what
would you say to make them feel a little
bit better let me know in the comments
and thank you so much for learning
English with me I'll see you again next
Friday for a new lesson here on my
youtube channel bye the next step is to
download my free ebook 5 steps to
becoming a confident English speaker
you'll learn what you need to do to
speak confidently and fluently don't
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channel for more free lessons thanks so
much
bye