-- WELCOME BACK, EVERYBODY!
LET'S GIVE IT UP FOR JON BATISTE AND "STAY HUMAN"!
GOOD TO SEE YA!
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) JON?
>> Jon: YEAH!
>> Stephen: WELCOME BACK!
>> Jon: YEAH!
>> Stephen: WELCOME BACK TO NEW YORK!
>> Jon: YEAH!
>> Stephen: ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
THIS FELLOW WAS DOWN IN NEW ORLEANS THIS WEEKEND.
>> Jon: THAT'S RIGHT.
>> Stephen: TELL THE PEOPLE WHAT YOU WERE DOING, MY FRIEND.
>> I PLAYED THE NATIONAL ANTHEM AT THE N.B.A. ALL-STAR GAME.
>> Stephen: FANTASTIC.
BEAUTIFUL.
>> Jon: THANK YOU.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: YOU KNOW, I LIKE
TO INTEREST MYSELF AMERICA'S DAD -- THAT I KNOW OF.
( APPLAUSE ) AND AS A PARENT, I KNOW HAVING
KIDS MEANS WORRY.
ARE THEY GETTING GOOD GRADES?
ARE THEY HANGING WITH THE WRONG CROWD?
OR WORSE, THE RIGHT CROWD?
NERDS.
BUT MY BIGGEST WORRY IS "AM I WORRYING ENOUGH?"
THANK GOD FOR LOCAL NEWS.
THEY ALWAYS UNCOVER THE LATEST TEEN TRENDS TO SOIL YOUR DAD
JEANS.
AND SOME OF THEM MIGHT EVEN BE HAPPENING.
TONIGHT'S PARENTAL SCARE STORY COMES FROM FOX Q-13, SEATTLE'S
TEEN NEWS LEADER, WHO HAS FOUND THAT OUR KIDS MAY BE TEXTING
EACH OTHER...
IN CODE.
>> TO YOUNG PEOPLE, EMOJIS CAN MEAN DIFFERENT THINGS, AND SOME
CYBER EXPERTS SAY KIDS ARE STARTING TO USE SOME AS A SECRET
CODE THAT WE AS PARENTS CAN'T NECESSARILY FIGURE OUT.
>> STEPHEN: YES, CHILDREN ARE DECEIVING US PARENTS WITH
CODES.
THAT MAKES ME L-O-L.
"LINGER OVER LIES."
( LAUGHTER ) AND THIS IS SOME SINISTER STUFF.
>> A FOX, YOU THINK THAT'S A SIMPLE ENOUGH THING, A FOX
RIGHT, BUT THAT CAN BE A MESSAGE TO SOMEONE THAT YOU WANT TO
SNEAK OUT, SNEAK OUT OF THE HOUSE.
A SKULL, ARROW AND A FLAME, THAT CAN BE SAYING TO SOMEONE "I HOPE
YOU DIE IN A FIRE."
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: SO TRUE.
SO TRUE.
THESE KIDS THESE DAYS, THEY'RE SO CLEVER.
( LAUGHTER ) IN THE OLD DAYS, WE HAD TO SAY
THAT IN A GREETING CARD, LIKE THIS ONE:
HAPPY SWEET 16.
I HOPE YOU DIE IN A FIRE.
( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )
AND THAT'S NOT THE ONLY HURTFUL MESSAGE KIDS ARE EMOJI-ING.
>> THIS IS A SCARY ONE YOU ALWAYS TALK ABOUT -- WELL I'M
NOT GOING TO GIVE IT AWAY.
WHAT DO YOU THINK-- WE GOT TWO EYEBALLS HERE.
>> I'M WATCHING YOU.
>>YES, THAT'S ONE OF THEM.
AGAIN, THESE HAVE A LOT OF DIFFERENT MEANINGS.
SO THIS COULD MEAN I'M WATCHING YOU.
BUT WE'RE ALWAYS WORRIED ABOUT SEXTING.
THIS CAN ALSO MEAN, SEND ME NAKED PICTURES OF YOU.
>> OH, MY GOSH.
>> Stephen: YES, YES, SO TRUE.
IT COULD ALSO MEAN "EYE WANT TO SEE YOU", "EYE
WANT YOU TO COME OVER MY HOUSE", OR "EYE THINK THIS ENTIRE NEWS
STORY IS BULL( BLEEP )."
( LAUGHTER ) ANY ONE OF THOSE.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) IT ONLY GETS WORSE FROM THERE.
>> SOME OF THESE ARE SO SIMPLE.
>> YEAH!
A FLOWER.
>> A FLOWER. YOU THINK THAT'S JUST A FLOWER RIGHT?
>> IT MEANS YOU WANT TO BRING YOUR MOTHER FLOWERS.
>> WOULDN'T THAT BE NICE?
>> YEAH!
>> IT CAN ALSO MEAN DRUGS.
>> Stephen: THERE IT IS.
THAT SIMPLE.
FLOWER MEANS DRUGS.
TAKE THAT, GEORGIA O'KEEFE!
YEP, THAT'S DEFINITELY DRUGS.
JUST SAY NO, KIDS!
SEE THIS DRUG?
DON'T TOUCH IT.
THAT'S A DRUG.
BUT I DON'T THINK THIS REPORT GOES FAR ENOUGH.
I CAN IMAGINE SO MANY MORE EMOJI CODES THAT KIDS COULD BE USING.
FOR INSTANCE, WE ALL KNOW THE EGGPLANT EMOJI MEANS PENIS.
( LAUGHTER ) BUT WHAT ABOUT CORN...
PENIS.
BURRITO...
PENIS.
AND I WISH YOU A MERRY PENIS.
( LAUGHTER ) NEXT, THE HEART EYES EMOJI LOOKS
INNOCENT ENOUGH.
SOME PEOPLE THINK IT MEANS "I LOVE YOU," BUT REMEMBER THESE
HAVE A LOT OF DIFFERENT MEANINGS, SO IT MAY ALSO MEAN
"LET'S HAVE PREMARITAL SEX IN A GRAVEYARD."
( LAUGHTER ) AND "DANCING WOMAN" IS USUALLY
UNDERSTOOD AS SOMEONE HAVING FUN OR CELEBRATING, BUT, WHEN KIDS
SEND THE DANCING WOMAN, THEY'RE ACTUALLY SAYING, "LET'S KILL MY
GRANDMA, THEN DANCE ON HER GRAVE."
( LAUGHTER ) AND OF COURSE ANGRY CAT MEANS,
DONALD TRUMP GRABBED ME.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) AND PARENTS, IF THAT'S NOT
TERRIFYING ENOUGH, TEENS MAY BE COMBINING EMOJIS TO SEND
MESSAGES.
FOR EXAMPLE, WAVING HAND DRESS, EGGPLANT, MOVIE TICKET
MOON, LAMP MEANS "I WOULD LIKE TO TOUCH YOU OVER THE CLOTHES IN
AN 8:00 P.M. SHOWING OF THE OSCAR-NOMINATED MOVIE
'MOONLIGHT.'" ( LAUGHTER )
AND HOW ABOUT THIS ONE?
FAMILY, PEACH, SANTA, SNOWFLAKE, STACK OF DOLLARS SEEMS LIKE A
NICE CHRISTMAS MESSAGE, BUT IT TRANSLATES INTO, "MY UNCLE PETE
IS A MALL SANTA, AND HE WILL SELL US COCAINE FOR CHEAP."
( LAUGHTER ) THAT HAPPENED TO A FRIEND OF
MINE.
THAT HAPPENED TO A SON OF A FRIEND OF MINE I KNOW.
HERE'S ANOTHER: PLATE, FORK, AND KNIFE, SMILEY
FACE WITH MONEY COMING OUT OF MOUTH, SKULL TRANSLATES TO "I
THOUGHT MONEY WAS FOOD SO I ATE IT AND NOW I'M DEAD."
( LAUGHTER ) AND IF YOUR TEEN SENDS THE
EMOJIS CHURCH, SLEEPY FACE FIRE, IT MEANS "I'M BORED IN CHURCH SO
I'M GOING TO COMMIT ARSON."
( LAUGHTER ) AND THAT'S JUST EMOJIS.
THERE'S A WHOLE OTHER GROUP OF SYMBOLS TEENS ARE USING TO SEND
MESSAGES.
THESE CAN BE COMBINED TO MEAN ANYTHING.
( LAUGHTER ) SO, PLEASE, STAY SCARED.