Hello my seafaring friends!
It's me, your red Admiral Kitty Purrfürst,
the feline whose flag may fly above your ship too,
if you’re the type who doesn't mind cats onboard your ships, that is.
Together, we'll make any opposing fleet’s whiskers tremble with fear!
I can often hear that the sea doesn't have piety for the weak.
The sea honors only those who are strong-willed, and strong physically!
If you spend your life on a warship,
you need to have the multitude of qualities
required to live through several lives.
It’s worth remarking, not everyone can cope with that.
And not everyone has such bountiful life reserves as meowself.
But that I have, and it’s why I cast in my lot with the sea,
and how I entered the Naval Kitty Academy,
after pausing at the door for a while.
That's how cats call it jokingly.
Actually, it's a very serious organization:
the Naval Cats' Academy, that's how it's really called.
Moreover, the educational establishment was classified,
and training was conducted by experienced naval officers,
who were familiar with the system of cats' drills
originating from Ancient Egypt.
Many of these unique, I dare say,
were specialists who signed non-disclosure agreements.
That's why they don't advertise their true activities,
and they're officially recorded as animal tamers in circuses or circus schools.
You can find outstanding artists amongst them;
many people will have seen their faces
on posters of circuses from various countries.
They are honorable recipients of state awards, but, nonetheless,
they consider naval education for cats to be their lifetime project…
Naturally, we're cats, we don't plant our paws at the helms of ships,
nor do we load shells and torpedoes.
We don't mop the deck either during training,
no matter how close we are to it.
Instead, it turned out that we're capable of fulfilling unusual
and extraordinary tasks that merrrre humans can't cope with.
During an in-depth examination of felines
and their consecutive, comprehensive, and long-term observation,
we discovered a series of advantages
proving that the quadruped can actually be very useful on a ship.
Let's start with the fact that cats have the unique ability
to emit up to one hundred completely different sounds.
Respectively, if we have a special transformer
capable of converting these sounds into radio waves,
we have a hundred new ways of encrypting useful information.
This ability led to cats occupying ships' radio cabins,
as a rule, performing the duties of second radio operators.
The next feature is in the whiskers,
which are so essential for any cat's spatial movement.
Systemic development of the whiskers’ skills allows cats
to replace short-range shipborne radars with ease.
This helps a crew detect stealthily approaching enemy ships,
such as destroyers, and sink them.
And, most importantly, our nine lives!
Say all you want, that Unsinkable Sam was a lucky cat,
but he had to sacrifice three of his lives in order to take his well-deserved rest.
As you understand, as a cat, you don't waste your lives like that,
not even a single one.
That's it for today.
I advise you to watch all my videos carefully
because they contain bonus codes.
The most curious captains will receive surprises
if they activate the codes on time.
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See you next time! Bye!