Hi everyone, welcome back to Lavendaire.
February is going to be all about
self love and self care, learning to love ourselves and take care of ourselves better,
from the inside and out.
Today we're going to talk about self love
and why it's so important, how you can love yourself better.
First of all, it's so important to love yourself because you have to love yourself first
before you can love your life.
Also: you have to give to yourself
before you can even give back to others.
Lucille Ball has this quote.
She says:
Today's video is a collab with my friend Kajal Pandey.
She is a life coach and self love warrior.
She's amazing and she has a video on her channel about the key to loving yourself,
so you can check that out.
Also: we have a podcast episode together that we recorded last year,
on self love.
It's still really good, it's one of my favorite episodes to date.
I'll post the link below so you can listen to that as well.
But the goal today is to get to a point where we can fully love ourselves,
embrace all that we are, and just feel amazing about ourselves.
And I want to read this quote from my Artist of Life Workbook on self love:
"Designing a beautiful life begins with self love.
Self love breeds self confidence,
self worth, self respect, self forgiveness.
Do not underestimate its power."
My first tip to loving yourself better is to write a list of all the things you love
about yourself.
List out all your strengths and your personality quirks, all the things that you genuinely
love
and enjoy about yourself.
And I know this might be tough for some people
because they never thought of it that way, but a little tip is: if you really don't know
what to write,
you can ask your closest friends or family what they love about you,
because it might surprise you what good traits they love about you, so do that.
And just find the things that make you, you.
Find the things that you really like about yourself.
Next: write a list of your flaws, and I know this might seem counterintuitive,
but the point of learning to love yourself is learning to embrace everything that you
are:
your good traits and your weaknesses and your flaws as well,
because we have to realize that we aren't perfect.
We're all human and that's okay.
I'm sure you love many people in your life, like your family members.
They're not perfect people.
They have flaws too but you still love them.
The point is to get to that place where you can love yourself, flaws and all.
Make a list of your flaws and, I know, when you're doing this you might have a tendency
to judge yourself and have negative emotions come up.
Just let it go.
Let go of all that judgment, all negativity.
And when you're done writing that list,
at the bottom, declare to yourself: “It's okay that I have these flaws.
I'm human, I'm imperfect, and that's beautiful.
I still love myself, flaws and all.”
Really see what this exercise can do for you in helping you embrace everything that you
are,
your strengths and your weaknesses, and just learning to love yourself regardless.
The next tip is to level up your self care, and by that I mean:
do whatever it takes to feel amazing every day, feel your best every day.
For example: for me, part of that is waking up to really good music.
That makes me feel great and gets my day off to a good start.
And another part is:
I want to put more effort into dressing better, because I notice when I dress lazy,
I don't feel too confident about myself.
I feel lazy as well.
So take that extra ten minutes
to pick out that really nice outfit that you really love and feel confident in.
If makeup makes you feel confident, then take that extra time to do makeup for yourself.
Or maybe you feel more confident and amazing when you have a bare face.
Sometimes I feel great just having no makeup on because it feels fresh.
So do whatever it is that makes you feel amazing, just take that little extra time
to take better care of yourself.
The point of this is to enhance your confidence
in your everyday life, starting from the outside in, which does work.
You can also build confidence from the inside out.
I have another video
that I've made in the past called "How to Gain Self Confidence" from the inside out.
I'll link that below because I don't want to go into it here, but self care from the
outside in,
you can really fake it til you make it.
You know, you look great on the outside,
it will make you feel great on the inside as well.
My next tip is to stop comparing yourself to others.
Do not fall into the comparison trap.
Girls, I know this one-even I am very, very guilty of this sometimes.
Sometimes I could be looking at someone else's YouTube channel like,
"Wow.
This girl has got it.
She's gorgeous.
She's growing fast," and I just compare myself
when I really shouldn't, because we're all on our own paths.
And it's because we're living in the social media era where everyone's Instagram is perfect,
everyone's life looks gorgeous online, and you know that's not real.
You know behind the scenes, everyone's going through their own struggle,
everyone is a human being.
You know no one's perfect, no one's better than you.
And you’re not better than anyone else.
We're all just on different paths.
We're all unique.
And it took me many years to realize that it's not a competition,
because I remember in college, I used to be comparing myself with other girls
and it would make me feel really insecure about myself.
But now I've gotten to a place
where I realize that it's not a competition; it's a community.
We're all here
to bring our own unique value to the world, and there's room for everybody.
You know, it's not a competition.
It's a community.
My next tip is to utilize a positive affirmation or power mantra to enhance your daily life.
This is some sort of phrase that declares how amazing and beautiful and powerful you
are.
I will read one from my workbook that I wrote:
“I am radiant.
I am powerful.
I am passion.
I am worthy.
I am love.
I am light.
I am magical.
I am incredible.
And I am wildly beautiful.“
You can write whatever you want.
Just write something that makes you feel powerful
and amazing like you're on top of the world, and read that to yourself every day.
I have a girl named Madeleine in our Workbook group and what she does is
she recorded herself reading all these positive affirmations
and then she plays that recording back to herself while she's like doing dishes or chores,
and it just brings her to another level.
I think that's such a great idea.
So either keep it on your phone so you can read it every day, keep it on your wall,
keep it at your desk.
And try recording yourself saying these things,
so you're like your own motivational speaker every day.
My last tip today is to keep a gratitude or self love journal.
Keep a journal
where you write down the things you're grateful for every day.
Write down the things you love about yourself and your life every day.
And you'll find that because you have to do it every day, you'll come up with new ideas,
new things to be grateful for, new things to really love about yourself and your life.
Keeping this kind of journal every day pushes you to be more creative and open your mind
to be like, "Okay, what else am I grateful for?
What else do I love about myself and my life?"
It challenges you in a good way to make you appreciate even the little things.
I'm grateful that I have an arm and a hand.
Things like that that you take for granted every day,
learn to love all of those things.
The more that you find in your life to be grateful for,
the more fulfilling your life will feel.
And it's just a really nice way to keep track
of everything that's amazing in your life.
The more you focus on the positive and the good,
the happier you'll feel.
There's no way that you could keep a self love and gratitude journal
every day, and not feel good about your life.
I don't think it's possible.
If you want to prove me wrong, try doing it for 30 days straight.
Write a love letter to yourself every day, write down your gratitude list every day,
and tell me you do not feel better about your life.
Basically, learning to love yourself takes time, effort, and energy
because you're actually building a relationship and this is the most important relationship
you'll ever have in your life: your relationship with yourself.
It's so important.
Like I said: love yourself first, and then everything else will fall into line.
You have to love yourself first in order to love your life,
in order to give back and take care of other people in your life.
Alright, I hope you liked today's tips on how to love yourself better.
This is by no means
a full list.
There are definitely so many more creative ways that you can learn
to love yourself better so if you have any self love tips of your own, feel free to post
them
in the description below so all of us can explore and try to see what works for us.
And if you haven't heard already, we have a new Facebook group
called The Lavendaire Lifestyle Community.
So click the link right here to join.
I'd love to have you guys in there and be able to connect on a deeper level.
Alright, that's it for today's video.
I hope you be that kind, loving, and compassionate person
because you have to learn to love yourself in order to spread love and positivity out
in the world.
And I truly believe that if everyone learned how to have full self love,
there would be like no bullies and no mean people in the world.
I'm serious about that,
so let's spread the love, spread the self love.
Send this video to anyone who might need it,
and just do you.
Alright, love you guys.
Bye!