- When you energetically let somebody go,
it completely changes the energy around the situation.
And so many times I've seen it
where when people actually let somebody go,
it allows them to bring their energy back,
and then it changes the whole entire dynamic.
So in this video,
I'm gonna show you why that is,
what actually happens energetically,
and what you can do about this to shift the energy,
to allow yourself to be more centered,
and safe inside of your own frame,
and ultimately also more magnetic.
Now, when thinking about this, and you look at it,
have you ever seen this happen
in your own life with friends, with family,
with anybody you've seen go through this,
where let's say somebody goes through a breakup,
and they're taking it really hard,
and it's really hard for them,
and they just can't get someone out of their mind,
they're thinking about this person getting back to them,
they're thinking of ways of like re-engaging
with somebody else, but no matter what they do,
it seems like it's actually making the situation worse.
And then something might happen
where they'll go out with friends, they'll go do something,
maybe go on a vacation,
or they'll start to focus
on their own self-growth or something.
And they stop investing their energy
into that specific person,
and then all of a sudden the energy shifts,
and that person reaches out,
there's a different type of energy there,
and it's almost like that person has
more vibrancy and more energy.
Well, what is happening energetically
between these two different people
is what you wanna understand
when it comes to letting someone go.
The reason the energy changes so much
when you let someone go
is you stop projecting energy at them.
So energetically, when you think of this,
think of almost like two stick figures,
and think of like a ball around these two stick figures.
And this ball of energy is simply the energy field.
We all have an energetic field
that goes far beyond our body,
and what happens is when we are thinking of somebody else,
we are literally sending them energy,
and projecting energy at them.
Now there's an interesting thing
that also happens with this, which I'll get into,
where normally the person, not normally,
but sometimes what might happen is
the person that is, the person wants space.
They're literally wanting space
and they're wanting to separate from the energy,
they're wanting to get back to themselves.
And what happens is
the more somebody's sending energy at them,
they're feeling that.
And anytime we think, like we live
in a collective consciousness where all of us are connected.
So when we think of somebody else,
we project energy at them.
And I know this too,
I did a live event recently, here in Austin,
and it is so crazy.
One of the the guests came up, one of the participants,
and she came on stage to be coached.
She's like, "Wow."
She's like, "When I'm up here, I feel so high."
She felt high when she was on stage.
And there is something that's very often known
in the speaker community of people that do live events,
there's a high that happens.
And so it's very important for people to be integrity,
because they can abuse that high, that energy,
that power in a way.
And what it is though is
when many people are focused on someone,
they're projecting energy at this person.
Now what happens is when we're thinking
of someone continuously,
and we're in a relationship with somebody else,
our energy fields are literally
inter-twingled like inter dwindled or tangled, entangled.
And what happens is when we want space,
we are moving that energy back to be separate.
Now what happens is if somebody,
if two people decide, or maybe one person decides
that they're gonna end the relationship,
and maybe somebody else is distraught about it,
the more this person thinks of that person,
and wants things to be different,
the more that that is actually pulling the person
to go away,
it's literally repelling them.
And think about the person
that is thinking about this person, this other person,
they're feeling resistance.
They're feeling, this person's maybe not responding to me,
there's something wrong,
this person's not coming around,
there's something wrong.
I want this, which means I lack this,
which means this person is doing what I want,
so it's wrong,
and then that resistance is being projected
at the other person, because whatever we feel,
other people feel, we're projecting it out to them.
So in the energy of projecting that energy
towards somebody else, they're literally feeling that energy
and it is having them go away and walk away.
Now, energetically, when you let go,
it allows the energy to then clear,
which then has a magnetizing effect.
And this is what I'm talking about
when I say I've seen this happen so many times,
even in my own life.
I remember one of my first girlfriends ever,
when I was in high school, I was in a relationship,
not even, I don't even know,
like six months or something like that,
and we were in a relationship,
and then it was very hard for me.
I did all these super crazy anxious attachment style stuff,
or I would call all the time, we would talk,
and what ended up happening towards the end is
I had this pattern of choosing people that didn't choose me
in a way, that kind of chose me, kind of didn't,
so I was in this pattern where what was happening
is towards the end of it,
it was getting frustrating,
and I was kind of like,
I felt kind of like it was happening to me in a sense
where I was like, "She's not getting back to me,
"she doesn't like me."
And it even got to the point
to where this person went to a school dance with somebody
other than me, even though I was her boyfriend.
And it was an interesting dynamic,
and she got a lot of flack from her friends
and other people for that,
and I remember in that moment, you know,
I didn't feel chosen.
And that was my trauma.
I believed that people,
I wasn't worthy enough to be chosen,
but nonetheless, it was a dynamic where I was chasing
that validation, that approval.
And it was also, I was like 17, 18 years old,
it was my first girlfriend ever, because many of you know
the story from seven to 15, I had no freedom at all,
so I wasn't even allowed to have a girlfriend at that time.
But then what happened was something interesting.
It was very hard, it was very challenging for me,
and then like a month later,
I started to make other friends,
and then I started to date,
and I had like other, like dating potentials,
and as I was exploring those,
I really started to let go of this person.
As I started to let go of this person,
I stopped sending her energy.
I stopped caring if she even called me,
and I completely let it go.
And then I was dating,
and kind of like just going on dates with somebody else,
well, interestingly enough, what happened
is once this person felt that, after a month or two,
and then noticing I wasn't chasing anymore,
then she was all of a sudden calling me crying,
wanting to get back together,
and it was this big situation thing.
And I was completely unattached, and had moved on.
And I remember like, it was so much easier for me,
because I'd already let go.
But the energy completely switched once I actually let go.
So the interesting thing about this
is this energy dynamic that I'm explaining,
that there's like one of two options here.
Either you let them go, and you realize
that the story you were making in your mind
about this person may not actually be true.
Sometimes we do that, we put people on pedestals,
and we make things a lot more glorified than we are.
We even develop certain stories
about like what this person,
like what this person like the halo effect, they call that,
and once we let that go,
that will help not put it on a pedestal,
doesn't mean we put them under a pedestal
we put them on the floor or anything,
it just means we stop putting them all the way up here,
because anything we put on a pedestal,
we create what is called excess potential,
which is really excess meaning,
which then makes it really, really important,
that things go well, which messes up the energy,
and then it separates us from it.
Now the second option is to actually reframe the meaning
you give to this person,
where you can realize maybe you had a great
type of reflection back and forth from each other,
but it's like you reduce the resistance
that you feel about this person,
by understanding that the relationship served its purpose.
Maybe it made you more aware of yourself,
your own sense of self worthiness, your own sense of value,
but regardless, the idea is
to release the energy of resistance,
because energetically when we're attached,
we're creating resistance.
Remember the Buddha said it himself.
At least that's what we think he said.
Suffering and attachment,
"Attachment and desire is the root of all suffering."
So the more we stay attached to other people,
wanting their validation, approval,
or even their love and support or whatever it is,
the more we want that, the more we're resistant,
and the more we end up repelling it energetically.
I've explained this in a couple recent videos,
so forgive me for being repetitive,
I make five videos a week,
but at a live event that I've been to before,
I remember there was a lady that did a TEDx talk
on energetics and she said to the crowd,
"Send me energy, send me energy."
She's like, "We'll do this energy exercise right now.
"Well, I'll show you the difference
"between these two energies."
And she's like,
"Send me energy, send me energy, send me ... "
Everyone's sending her, projecting energy at her.
She said it was making her repel and move backwards.
She said, "Okay, now I want you to bring the energy
"into your body, bring it back,
"bring it back into your body, feel inside your body."
And as she did that, she said she could feel
like almost magnetically pulled towards the audience.
And I'll say that as well,
just from sometimes I'll meet people
that may recognize me for my videos,
and if they're like, if they put me on a pedestal,
and like, "Oh my God, Aaron,
"oh my God, you're so cool."
Blah, blah, blah, blah,
it is a very interesting energy.
I remember first getting on YouTube,
being like it'd be so cool, my significance wound,
I felt so small and insignificant, that I was like,
"I just can't wait to be recognized in public."
And what would happen is people would do that,
and if they put me on a pedestal, it'd feel kind of weird.
It's like, I almost didn't know what to do with that energy.
But if they talk to me like I'm just normal person's,
it's very easy because it's not on a pedestal.
It's almost like energetically
people are just responding to the way we're treating them.
And if you treat someone like a celebrity,
they treat you like a fan.
So if you treat somebody that you're dating
like this awesome, amazing, just glorified person,
it's like energetically, they naturally feel
like responding in that way.
And it's like just an energetic way of relating also.
So energetically, when you let someone go,
it lets go of all the resistance,
it also allows you to come back to self.
One thing I'd recommend you do is become aware
of maybe an abandonment wound that is there.
Because a lot of times the reason
people are chasing someone else,
or having trouble let go of someone else
is because they've tethered onto a similar childhood dynamic
from when they were like kids, that feels very familiar,
and that familiar energy,
they're fighting to prove to their parents
that they are worthy.
They're trying to close the loop from childhood.
And then we get caught in the story
that this person is my cure to like
curing my childhood trauma and stuff like that.
So one thing I highly recommend you do
is look at this energy, and become aware that what you think
what you might be thinking is like,
the cure to like your happiness and all of this
may just be trying to close the loop
on childhood pain, childhood trauma that feels familiar,
and what might be more powerful is to actually let them go
and to bring your energy back to yourself
to stop abandoning yourself.
Lot of times, this is an abandonment wound.
When you stop abandoning yourself,
you start feeling much more strong inside your own frame.
And when you're in your own frame, or in your own body,
you will have very magnetic energy.
So energetically that's what's happening,
and the truth is the more confident you feel,
the more you feel inside your own body,
inside your own frame, the more confident you feel,
the less you want to attach to other people's energy,
because you'll feel safe within yourself.
You won't find frame in other people,
you'll find frame within,
frame is like your sense of reality and sense of security.
Now something we're doing July 1st to the 21st
is a 21 day confidence love challenge.
The confidence love challenge is where you feel self-love,
and self-confidence,
21 days to a more confident you,
and we're gonna be going through a process together.
This is a process, this isn't something
where you watch videos and it's like a passive thing,
you actually do things,
there's accountability and a Facebook group.
If you've been a part of my 21-day-challenges before,
then you'll know they take on a life of their own,
and it's a way of really wiring in a new you in 21 days,
removing the fear, the blocks, the doubt
that are keeping you in your current reality
that are blocking love from your life.
We're gonna be also learning about the aspects of love,
so taking down the masculine and feminine shield,
feeling it safe inside of our own frame, polarity,
we're gonna be talking about all these things.
So if you wanna join now is the best time to join,
go to www.confidencelovechallenge.com
or click the link below and join,
now is the best time to join
to get lifetime access to everything,
when you join right now,
which means that even after the 21 days,
you can always come back and go through the processes again,
and then also, if you want a video that talks
more about letting go and why that completely changes
the energy and how you can do it even more in detail,
this video right here will help you do that.
Why is it that when you want someone, when you desire them,
they feel that energy, and it literally repels them
away like a magnet?
However, the moment you actually let them go,
like right now, as I do this, it's really,
these are really strong magnets by the way.