Hi, my name is Brad Browning, and I’m a relationship coach and breakup expert. This
video will give you some tips and advice on how to get over your ex and get on with your
life as quickly as possible. Now, if you’ve seen some of my other videos,
you know that I usually talk about how to get your ex back…. and this video definitely
applies to those who want their ex back, but it’s also relevant for anyone who just wants
to move on and find someone new. So, let’s get started!
To begin with, I need to give you a bit of unfortunate news… and that’s that all
breakups, regardless of the circumstances, are painful to some degree. There’s really
no magic solution or quick fix that will make your heartache disappear overnight. There
are, however, a few things you can do to help suppress the post-breakup emotions and help
you get over your ex as quickly as possible. The first step is to accept the reality of
your situation.
It’s not helpful or productive to deny the reality that you and your partner are no longer
together, nor is it going to do you any good to try and talk things over with your ex.
Instead, try to own up to the situation you’re faced with and accept that your ex is no longer
a focal point of your life. Accepting that can be painful, but now is the time to let
out your emotions and come to grips with life as it stands now that your relationship has
ended.
Don’t be afraid to do a bit of crying or spend some time alone in the first day after
your breakup, especially if it helps you accept the reality of what’s happened. But do your
very best to avoid having these emotional breakdowns while your ex is present.
In fact, during these early stages, it’s not a good idea to speak to your ex at all.
In particular, avoid begging, pleading, or apologizing to your ex in an attempt to reverse
their decision or in hopes of finding closure.
Many people will try to search for answers after a breakup — trying to learn what they
did wrong or why their ex decided to end things — which is not the right thing to do, especially
in the first few days after your breakup. Instead, you and your ex should go your separate
ways, and you should try to get control of your emotions and accept your reality without
looking for answers or asking yourself what you might’ve done differently.
By the way, if you’re not ready to let go and you’re hoping to get back together with
your ex, then now is a good time to tell you about my free quiz tool…. I’ve created
a quiz on my website that will help you figure out whether or not your ex will take you back
and what your odds of success are. It takes about 5 minutes to complete, and you can try
it out for yourself at www.BreakupBrad.com/Quiz.
Now, moving on... once you’ve come to grips with the reality of your situation, it’s
time to remove all visible reminders of your ex. There’s nothing worse than being reminded
of a painful memory every time you walk into your bedroom… which is why one of the most
important ways to move on is to remove visible reminders around your house.
Take down photos, love notes, gifts from your ex, and any other items that might remind
you of your past relationship and putting them in a box in your attic. Eventually, you
can open them up again, but only when you’ve moved on completely. For now, you don’t
want to be reminded of your ex.
You should also make sure that you “hide” or “mute” your ex’s status updates and
notifications on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. This will ensure that you’re not reminded
of your ex and seeing what they’re up to every time you log in to your social media
accounts. I don’t recommend deleting or blocking your ex completely -- it’s usually
enough just to hide their status updates or posts from your news feed.
If you’re really struggling with self-control and can’t seem to stop yourself from texting
or calling your ex, I also recommend writing down your ex’s number on a piece of paper
and giving it to a friend, and then deleting it from your phone completely. You don’t
need to contact your ex right now, and deleting their info from your contacts list is a good
way to make sure you don’t do something dumb.
With all reminders of your ex now removed from your life, the next step is to stay busy
and keep yourself occupied at all times. If you sit around the house doing nothing, you’re
giving yourself a chance to think things over and bring undue heartache upon yourself. It’s
best to keep busy with work, school, hobbies, or any other activities that keep your attention
focused on something other than your ex. Even watching a favorite TV show or playing video
games will take your mind off the breakup for a while.
You should also lean on your friends and family. Try to avoid being alone whenever possible
– go out with friends or spend time with family, even if it’s the last thing you
feel like doing. Trust me when I say that being social is one of the single most effective
ways of getting through a breakup.
It’s also important during all of this that you continue to maintain healthy habits. Scientists
have proven that vigorous exercise produces ‘feel good’ chemicals such as seratonin
and dopamine in your brain. That means that an intense 30-60 minute workout 3-4 times
a week can help you avoid depression and feel better about life in general. It’s also
important to maintain healthy eating habits and generally take care of yourself so that
you don’t add any extra stresses on your body or mind.
All of those things will help speed up the process and mimize your heartache, but I should
also mention that the single best way to recover from a breakup is to find someone new.
Now, I realize that at this point you’re probably not really interested in going on
dates or going out and meeting members of the opposite sex, but if you can force yourself
to get out there and start dating again, you’ll be doing yourself a big favor and you’ll
find that the breakup emotions completely disappear once you find a new guy or girl
to replace your ex. So, as soon as you can stomach it, get out there and start meeting
people and going on dates. Online dating is a great way to start, so consider signing
up for a few free datings sites as soon as possible.
If you happen to talk with your ex (either on purpose or as a result of an accidental
encounter), try to stay positive and keep things cordial. Even if your breakup was nasty
and you hate your ex’s guts, starting a fight or being mean to them to try and “get
even” is not going to help you feel any better and usually just leads to more problems
and drags out your recovery. I recommend ignoring your ex completely and avoiding any non-essential
contact with him or her until you’re fully over the breakup.
Finally, if you find yourself struggling with depression and heartache even after you’ve
done all the things I’ve talked about in this video, try to remember that every day
that passes is another step towards a full recovery. You may not feel any better today
than you did a week ago, but I can promise that in a month or two you’ll look back
and realize that each day you spent a bit less time thinking about your ex. Sooner than
later, you’ll be back to normal and completely over your ex.
Thanks for watching…. if you have comments or questions, please use the comments section
below and I’ll do my best to respond to you personally. And finally, please take a
moment to click the “like” button below this video if you found it helpful… and
if you want more advice on recovering from your breakup or winning back your e’s heart,
please subscribe to my YouTube channel for more videos like this one.
See you next time!