Hey there, welcome back.
It's clay with modernlove.life and this is relationship inner game.
Today what we're going to be doing is we're going to be talking about how long should
you be doing no contact for.
Again, this really does depend on which type of no contact you're doing passive no contact,
active no contact, reverse psychology, "let's play" mind games no contact or uh, you know,
he opened the breakup no contact or you know, all kinds of different types, but I'm just
going to be moving forward assuming that we're talking about active no contact because that's
what I teach.
So how long should you be doing it?
And the main thing shouldn't be focusing on some specific number of days, like you know,
a week, two weeks, three weeks, a month, three months, five months, six months or anything
like that.
What you should really be thinking about is the quality of the interactions that you believe
that you'd be able to have with your ex.
So oftentimes it would be highly recommended that somebody would go into no contact of
any type because quite frankly, they are not having positive interactions with their ex,
you know, every time they pick up the phone and call their ex, they have an argument or
their walls them out or every time they text they're actually, they just get met with some
like, angry response or they're just no response whatsoever.
Otherwise, every time they're interacting they are having a worse and worse interaction
with them that is causing them to distance themselves from you emotionally.
OK.
What we're doing during active no contact is we are creating a new context where we
can develop the ability to interact with our ex in a way that actually brings us closer
together.
So you don't want to just kind of white knuckle it through no contact and hope that just because
some certain amount of days have passed, uh, that you're suddenly going to be able to have
a great impact on your ex.
So putting some time, make sure that you are doing something to actually have a great positive
impact on your ex.
That should really determine the length of no contact.
OK?
If you're making progress and you're developing advanced relational skills and you're able
to have stronger interactions with people that bring the two of you deeper, that allow
for more connection then you're making great progress and that could be a sign that, you
know, it might be, have been long enough for you to get out of no contact.
OK?
Especially if you also factor in the other reasons that you might do no context such
as personal healing from the break up and, um, allowing enough time for your ex's reactance
to sort of die down a little bit and all of that stuff.
OK?
But as a general rule of thumb, I would recommend that you would do active no contact for about
30 days, about one month.
OK?
This is by no means a strict rule that everyone must follow.
But generally I think that it's a good rule of thumb, a good starting point.
Some people might need more time, a very, very few people might need less time.
But it's a good starting point.
A good rule of thumb and you shouldn't really focus on the amount of time, so much as on
the quality of the interactions that you're able to have.
So anyway, that's how long you should be doing no contact for.
And that's how you should be thinking about it anyway.
Once again, this is clay with modernlove.life.
What you can do if you want to learn more about all of this is to head down below and
click the link in the description of this video.
And what that'll do is it'll take you to our website relationshipinnergame.com, where you
can tell us a little bit about yourself and your breakup and all that stuff.
And we'll start to send you some customized advice tailored to your specific situation
that will help you to get back together with the person that you love.
If you're watching this on our website in modernlove.life, if you click a link down
below this video, what will happen is that you'll be taken to a page that will tell you
a little bit more about some of our more advanced, more intricate, more guided trainings that
you can go through to help you get back together with your ex.
So once again, I hope that this video has helped you out.
If you, uh, would like to leave a comment in the comment space down below on Youtube,
I'm just go ahead and let me know what kinds of topics you'd like me to make videos on
in the future.
OK?
And of course, if you've enjoyed this video, please like and subscribe anyway, take care.
I'll see you next time.