Hi, it`s Vince with...
sHaMwOw!
You'll be saying WOW every time you use this towel!
For the house, car, boat, RV. Doesn't drip.
You know, the Germans always make good stuff.
Wine, Coffee, Cola, you follow me camera guy? No other towels gonna do that.
I just love it!
Oh my gawd!
ShamWOW, WOW, WOW!
Salesman voice: CaLl nOW!
Mac: Do I regret my decision? NO!
Do I ever regret my decisions? NEVER BITCH!
FUCK YOU! MAC
So in my grand odyssey on the internet
I have come to the conclusion
that every single last person on this planet around my age
Has seen the same g*ddamn, motherf*cking commercials
At the same g*ddamn, motherf*cking time.
So I made it my responsibility
to figure out if all those commercials
are just a ShAm or actual secrets to life
that we all need to understand.
You never know.
Maybe the ShamMow will solve racism.
Why don't we figure out today
Salesman: CaLl NoW!
I'm here with the ShamWow,
WoW!
the ShamWazaski!
We all know the ShamWow,
the glorified rag from the 2000s
with the man with the thick ass East Coast accent [you're gonna love my nuts]
telling us to clean our f*cking lives up.
You remember that bitch?
And today we're gonna figure out
what the f*uck it does. Ok?
Am I making an entire video dedicated to a f*cking towel? YES.
Are you going to watch it?
That's up to you. I don't give a shit.
Actually, I do. Can you stay? Can you stay please?
Can you actually tell your friends to subscribe too? I'm trying to hit 2 million.
I'm trying to actually like... live. (You know? x2)
WoW!
They did not just give me 4 gigantic ShamWows,
they also gave me 4 little ones!
That's right! I called right now and got my order doubled!
Did you? Fuck you.
I didn't get the ShamWow mop though.
So I feel like I deserve my money back
but you know what bitch is not gonna fight.
She's an award winner now, she don't need the money anyways!
MHHAHAHA ShE mAkEs So MuCh Of It MHHAHAHAMAGANAGANAGANA
CALL NoW!
ShamWow!
Why ShamWow in the first place?
Let's talk about that.
Why Sham in the first place?
What's Sham about?
A Shamrock shake?
A shmock? A shmock.
A sHmOcK?!
F*ck you!
We're gonna try out this
f*cking rag, ok?!
So excited
I am so happy I did this
I am over the wall,
bouncing on the floor,
as we speak.
You remember how you saw those commercials as a child and you're like,
"I really want that!"
I feel like every single last damn commercial that came on my goddamn screen
I would want it.
So yes, I wanted a thick towel my entire goddamn life.
Is that a problem? Is that a crime?
Am I a nerd? Am I a dork? Am I a geek?
You can say whatever the f*ck you want
I don't care, you don't understand my life.
Someone please relate to me about this,
it's like the weirdest thing I've wanted in my entire life.
I don't understand why I wanted this,
I just found it so cool! Like he took liquid out of a rug bitch!
Name another hoe. Name another hoe!
All those testimonials sounded so real.
Oh My GoSh! I dOn'T eVeN bUy PaPeR tOwElS aNyMoRe!
And I was like bitch Sham-----random ladies: wOw!
Wow.
Let's do this before my roommate comes back and starts yelling HA HA MOOD!
He doesn't respect the fact that I get anxious
*slowly getting sadder* when other people are in this goddamn apartment when I'm filming a video!
Cut that out Mac.
CALL NOW!
How are we gonna do this?
*spills water on the floor *
OH NOO!
OH MY GOD!
HOLY SHIT!
I have just spilled water all over the floor of my Los Angeles coondo!
And I don't know if I have enough paper towels to soak it up!
If only I had some type of soaking device
that could soak up ALL of these liquid juices in one fellow swoop!
*and then magically cut to this Mac*
Oh WoW!
That ShamWow bitch?
WoW!
I don't know if it works
but let's pray it gets this water off of my floor before
the wood gets wetter.
I don't know.
SHAM WOW!
*sarcastically* WoW! x 3 each time getting longer
The bitch is still wet.
CALL NOW
Now the rag feels like, gross.
I mean WoOoOw!
Sham, you're AmAzInG *eheheh*
Now I'm sitting on a wet floor and my butt is cold.
But, WOOOW! Ha-ha-holy shit.
Now the entire thing feels like,
have you ever sat in a wet theater seat by accident?
That's kinda what this feels like.
It's giving me war flashbacks.
Someone pissed himself. What's happening here?
Was the movie that scary bitch?
It's just Shrek 2.
It's also supposed to like, ring out too apparently, so like...
Nope.
CALL NOW
Let's try a mini one. Let's see if this one has better effect.
'Cuz you know what they say,
"If the big ones don't work the smaaall ones....
got squirt."
I don't know actually what- *beep*
OH JESUS!
HOLY SHIT!
The liquid came back for REvenge!
What the f*uck will I ever doo?!
*distorted DOOOO*
Am I laying in the puddle?
ShamWow! Commercial Woman: Oh My God! (repeat)
It's still very fu**ing wet.
WoW!
Ok now it should wring out, watch this.
Oh shit! Fuck. Wait.
What did we give the floor test?
Zero! 'Cuz, what the f*ck?
I jUsT lOvE iT!
And now time for test #2.
We see him place the yellow monstrosity,
in like a pot and it soaks up the water in 0.2 seconds.
So we're gonna fu**ing do that.
Why am I saying the f word so much?
Take a shot every time I say that f word.
Don't. Actually.... And if you're watching this with your parents,
Hi. I'm nice, I swear. They can keep watching me they just shouldn't learn from me.
K, let's fu**ing do this!
CALL NOW
Oh! Shit balls!
Holy guacamole!
I have ALL of this water in this clear thingy!
and I have NO ideea hooow tooo dry it
*chuckles* Yup! That's the story! *2nd chuckle* That's the fu**ing story!
ShamWow!
Commercial Woman: Oh My God! (every time he touches it)
And guess what? It doesn't drip. *drips*
That much. *beep*
Now you just wring it out right?
WOW! Just what I wanted!
Yellow water.
Wooow.
Vince: Doesn't drip.
Let's try the smaller one.
Oh! f*ck my ass!
Oh! Watermelon!?
I have all of this ODDLY warm liquid in this bowl and I have no idea how to soak it up!
HOW will I EVER find a SINGLE product
that I can DO in one fellow swoop
ShamWooow!
Commercial Woman: Oh My God! (repeats many times)
And it doesn't drip!
*drips*
Just pours apparently!
CALL NOW
Ok great. Whatever, whatever, you know what f*ck it.
My life's a mess anyway.
Test #3 - *pounds table* - the rug bitch.
Apparently ShamWow's fiber technology, whatever the hell that means,
is SO powerful, it can soak up liquid THROUGH a rug,
and make it look like it was never there in the first place.
So let's find out if that is true
or if that was a stupid ass editing trick,
that they fooled us little minded kids,
for so goddamn long.
Scamming us into buying
fu**ing insulation bitch.
OH MY GOD!
HOLY SHIT!
MMMMmmm!
I spilled ALL of this cranberry juice,
ON my expensive ass rug, in my expensive ass apartment!
It's so much liquid, it leaked down to the bottom!
Vince: Here's your mildew.
AND that's mildew!
MMMIIILLDEEEW!
*sarcastically* I wonder how I will soak up this stain
In one fellow swoop..
without having to call professional!
SHAMWOW!
Look! Part of the liquid is already coming out!
and then some magic rolling! because I don't know what the f*ck that does.
Turn it over, punch the shit.
*Vince and Mac pound together*
And!
WoW!
CALL NOW
WoW!
What if we try a second one? Maybe the second one will clean it up.
*punching sounds*
Well fuck.
NOW! CALL
You know what, as long as it got it from the bottom.
That shit is still wet as f*ck. Oh My -
Wow!
SlOw MoTiOn?
*music* "slow motion for me" (2x)
Wow! How useless!
And for the price of $19.95!
*harsh coughing*
oh wait now it sme-
*coughing and gagging*
WHY DOES IT SMELL LIKE ROTTEN EGG?
OH MY GOSH! IT SMELLS SO BAD!
WAIT IM NOT EVEN BEING OVERDRAMATIC RIGHT NOW!
THAT *cough* SMELLS SO GROSS!
I'm not even going to try the small one.
F*ck you, f*ck you, ok?
Oh my gosh please end this. Oh my god I'm going to end this!
I can't sit here with that smell anymore. Oh my god it smells so bad!
Now the fourth test I was gonna do is that apparently,
it washes and dries and comes out like it's never been used before.
So you know what, instead I'm going to do that in the morning with my pointing shoot and we're gonna see.
*BOOW* x6
Nope. ShamWow more like Wow what a Sham.
So what did we learn today kids?
No.
Just no. The ShamWow is not worth it in my opinion.
We have been lied to our entire childhood
by a man that I think now has a sexual assault charge against him?
I think he's in prison, isn't he in prison? Wait a minute.
It wasn't his invention though I don't believe
so like don't cancel me on this. *laughs*
CALL NOW
Comment down below, whose
F*ck it nevermind, I don't know.
I just really wanna get away from this goddamn smell! I can't even think!
These people really out there standing in what looks like Kansas
Lying to us in these testimonials!
Commercial Woman:Oh My God!
Shut up Bertha!
Y'all lying asses!
Anyways my name is Mac
🎶and you have just been🎶
done it.
I won an award bitch and I changed.
Don't forget to like, comment, share, and subscribay!
BWAAA!
monotone *this is the part where the ending music plays* overlapping a bunch of times along with "yass," "slay," and "skrrt skrrt"