Sunny: Every day, we have a choice.
You can either play safe and dip your toe in, or you can dive in the deep end and learn
how to swim; discover how capable you are, and do things that you once thought that you
were completely impossible.
And this week, we're going deep, boss.
What is a growth mindset?
Let's first start with what a fixed mindset is.
A fixed mindset is basically where you believe that your basic traits; like your intelligence
or your talent are fixed.
They just are what they are; whereas a growth mindset is basically the polar opposite.
A growth mindset, according to the psychologists who actually coined the term, Carol Dweck;
is a mindset where people believe that most of their basic abilities, i.e talent or intelligence,
can be developed through dedication and hard work.
In order to build my business to where it's at now, I have had to seriously harvest and
develop a growth mindset.
Otherwise, you just kind of stay stuck and you have this fear of growing any bigger,
and it really paralyzes you into a small place.
You look at any professional athlete or if you look at any superstar celebrity or CEO
or a leader of any kind; they have a growth mindset.
This is really a must-have quality if you're going to grow in any capacity in your life.
So how have I developed my growth mindset?
Well, I've learned a lot over the last couple of years, and I wanted to show you the top
five methods that I have used to develop a growth mindset to continue to grow.
If you're excited about this, which, I really am because I love talking about this stuff;
hit that like button below and let's dive in.
Pun intended.
With number one, it's all about identifying and rewriting your story.
So say you're one of those people who goes into a party, and you think in your head,
"Well, I'm just shy.
I'm not going to be able to talk to anybody.
I'm not going to be comfortable in conversations."
Even for me, someone who is very outgoing, I still am somewhat of an introvert and I
do sometimes find going to big events really daunting and really overwhelming.
So part of what I've learned is that a lot of the things that we believe about ourselves
are stories that we bought into over our entire lives.
It's just about rewriting it and redefining it.
This can also come from other people.
If someone told you that you were a bad dance when you were in high school, you're going
to believe that for the rest of your life.
But here's the thing.
If you have a growth mindset, you know that you can start practicing on a daily basis.
You can go take a dance class, you can figure it out, and you can rewire your brain to believe
that, "No, you're actually a great dancer.
You just have to develop those skills."
At this point in your life, it's your turn to redefine and rewrite that story.
That's how this begins.
You have to figure out what is actually true and what is a story that you've been telling
yourself, and then make that story something that you want to evolve and grow into.
Then the number two is visualization, because I firmly believe if you can think it, it can
happen.
If you look at any of the greatest inventors in the world, they're really an entrepreneur,
because you are an inventor at the end of the day.
Everything starts up here.
I read this really great book, it's called Mind Hacking.
Highly, highly, highly, highly, highly recommend it.
There was an exercise in here that made so much more sense to me, and I want you to think
about this as I read out some of the things that you could be doing.
So in the book, the exercise looks like this.
Try to picture your best possible future.
Where will you live?
What will you do for work?
For fun?
Will you have a partner?
What kind of friends will you have?
How much money will you have?
What will your mind look like?
Just close your eyes, sit for five minutes, think about this, and then write it down.
So, just have fun.
Experiment, answer those questions, and I would love for you to tell me in the comments
below where you live in this visualization.
Say it's five or ten years out.
Where are you living?
Number three is: Curate your surroundings.
What I mean by this is you have to be so careful about what you consume and who you surround
yourself with if you really want to grow.
We all have those friends, maybe from high school who talk about the same things that
you talked about in high school and who only talk about the past.
Well, that's going to keep you there.
There's nothing wrong with having friends like that, but you also want to make sure
that the majority of your time is spent with people who think bigger and doing things way
beyond you, because that changes your reality.
Once I started surrounding myself with fellow entrepreneurs who are way far and beyond me,
and taking them for a lunch, taking them for a coffee; becoming friends with them, building
relationships.
I looked at what they were doing and what their lives looked like, and I was like, "Oh
my gosh.
It's possible.
It's real, it's tangible."
That saying of, "You're some of the five people you spend the most time with," it's very true.
I think I butchered the saying, but it's true.
Noises, distractions, making sure you block those out.
The news even.
If you're highly, highly sensitive and you wake up every morning and you watch the news,
and there's something awful; maybe that's not the right time for you to consume that
information, so being cautious of how you actually consume content on a daily basis.
Oprah actually was saying in a recent interview that whenever she goes to a new city and she's
picked up in a limo; one of her rules is that the radio is turned off.
She doesn't go to a new city and immediately is inundated with bad news.
She'll choose the time of when she actually wants to see or hear what's going on in the
world.
We're often forced messaging that is status quo to keep us small, so if you can curate
your surroundings by choosing the right books to read and people to surround yourself with,
and experiences to have and noises to take in, and stories to be told; it changes everything.
So, four is "Say no to say yes".
What I mean by that is: Stop doing things out of fear of being disliked or disappointing
someone.
Start doing things from a place of, "How do I feel about this?"
One of the biggest factors for me growing was actually starting to say no, which might
sound weird, because you think that you have to say yes to everything, but no.
There's a lot of experiences that don't serve, and as you grow and as a former people-pleaser,
the more opportunities come your way, the more people are asking you for things.
The more you go, "I should be saying yes to this, I have to say yes to this or else I'm
going to become irrelevant."
But, it's actually better to say no a little more as you grow, because it makes you more
in demand and it makes it more of a quality experience when people actually do get to
see you and interact with you, and you can be more present because you're not burnt the
"F" out from being at everything and saying yes to everything.
If you haven't seen Jay-Z and Beyonce's recent video, there's actually a line in there from
Jay-Z that hit home so hard for me, where he says-
Jay-Z: "I said no to the Superbowl.
You need me, I don't need you."
Sunny: In the beginning, totally get it.
You have to say yes to a lot of things.
You have to get out there, you have to grind, you have to hustle.
But as you grow and as you continue to develop your growth mindset, saying no is going to
be one of the biggest factors to your continued growth, and only saying yes to things that
really, really matter to you.
Number five is so vital, and the first time I tried to do this, it was painful.
So give yourself grace if this is a really painful process for you, but number five is
the proud list.
I was really used to writing my gratitude journal every night for everything I'm grateful
for, and I still do that.
But I've added on something called the "Proud list", because it reminds me of how far I've
come on a daily basis and how much I have to be proud of, and how much further I can
go, because I've already accomplished so much.
Every night, writing five to ten things that you're proud of yourself for, it can be as
simple as, "I'm proud of you for having that hard conversation with one of your team members,"
or, "I'm proud of you for sending that courageous email."
Whatever it is, remind yourself to take pride in what you're doing, because too often, we're
comparing ourselves to everybody else; we're trying to keep up with the [Jones-es 00:08:42].
We don't look at ourselves and go, "You're doing all right."
And you are.
So next time you find yourself in the deep end, remember.
You're capable of so much more than you think you are.
It's not just dipping your toe in or even diving in.
The next thing you know, you'll be doing cannonballs and mastering things that you once thought
were impossible.
If you're ready to do things that you once thought were impossible, and this video motivated
you to do so; plus, make sure you subscribe to the Sunny Show podcast, because we have
so many episodes over there with experts on setting up your mindset for success.
The link is below to subscribe.
Plus, you can't forget about Boss Club.
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productivity tips.
Thanks for always bringing your A-game and helping us out.
I love what I'm building during nap time and bed time."
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Plus, subscribe for new videos every single Tuesday.
Next week, I'm talking all about the eight habits that stunt your success, and they might
just surprise you.
So, I will see you then.
Thank you so much for watching, I hope you enjoyed this as much as we enjoyed making
it, and I'll see you in the next video.
Bye!