[Music]
we say and all the time a parenting is
hard work we are all constantly worrying
about how we might be messing up our
children to give you really stressful
yeah and one of the big areas that
parents worry about raising kids with
self-confidence and today we're excited
to welcome author and speaker Arlene
France to help us with just that I love
this thank you so much for coming in but
you know self-esteem is a big issue
these days the kids with the internet
and all the stuff being thrown at them
they're walking around not feeling good
about themselves people are so critical
no kidding yeah especially with little
girls and with the boys too and yet it's
about the family about your children so
you say that there are questions that we
should be asking ourself as parents the
first is what exactly are you well it
was example you setting if you're
sitting at home drinking a beer watch
the TV smoking not taking care of
yourself your kids are gonna look at
that and think that's okay do you really
want that for your kids even think you
want something better for them you know
in the second thing what kind of friends
are they bringing home do they bring
home their girlfriends that are full of
makeup and sexy clothes and the boys
pants or hair falling down you know do
you want your kids to hang around with
kids like that
there are plenty organizations I have
amazing programs for kids so they can
meet new kids new friends and the third
one is your kid coming home Moody you
know from school up they go in the room
they close the door and we'll talk to
anybody you see the change in their
personality something's going on and
I'll bet you they're being bullied at
school so you need they're closing off
from you because I don't you know they
don't want to talk to anybody and be a
bully you know so you need to find out
what's going on
yeah and help them okay so what do we do
give us some well here's what you can do
for a genius to give them lots of love
and attention tell them you love them
and hug them and kiss them and if you
have kids that are not the huggy kissy
time give them a fist bump give them a
high-five just tell them encourage
encouragement because if they don't get
love from you they're gonna go out look
for a normal place that's so nice for
image you know they're like the two
shorts are too tall they're too fat or
too thin they don't like the way they
look like another beautiful in your eyes
and that their bodies are gonna change
and it's gonna be better you know and
always have realized they have their own
dreams and their own aspiration and what
they want to become in their life and
support them on it right so not pushing
your stuff exactly my daughters became
son
I never in a million years thought I
would have daughters or besides but
whatever they wanted I supported them
man you know I was to listen to them
we're so busy on the cell phone doing
this cookie cleaning going to work that
we're not giving them the time and you
need to listen to them when they say mom
or dad I want to talk to you stop what
you're doing listen to them and the
other thing is you want it I know you
want to give your opinion or what they
should be doing just zip it zip it and
let them do the talking and give them
your full attention what if they're not
doing the talking how do you get them to
talk you know what if you stop and
really listen to them they will talk if
they see you're given the full your full
attention if they see you're distracted
like looking at phone or what's going
over here they're going to stop they're
gonna freeze up and they're never gonna
talk to you yeah and you want to open
conversation with your kids and the
other thing is to teach them to say no
you know together to spit in a situation
that's dangerous or not comfortable for
them to stand in their power to be bold
and break my daughter used to get
bullied in a line at school behind her
and she came home one day crying she
said this kids picking on me all the
time I said you go to school more and
you look that kid in the eye and you say
no that's not okay do not do that to me
anymore and you know what it stopped
because police'll Bullock bully bullies
will pick on kids that they see have low
self-esteem so be bold and brave and
stand in your power Wow so we want our
kids to be brave you want our kissy girl
to be healthy and happy to have great
self-esteem so when they get older they
can accomplish things in their life and
they're not gonna listen to all those
voices that say you're not good enough
you're bad you know it's adults we hear
that all the time I still do it to
myself exactly we do that but the more
we give them self-esteem and so many
different ways and to me the most
important thing is to giving your time
you know parents are working two jobs
right now you know that that's hard hard
to make ends meet these days and so
where can we find out more information
about you what's the website you can go
to Arlene Krantz calm and check on it
please all right