Complimenting a woman or girl
is a great skill to have
because it makes her feel good
and when she feels good
she associates feeling good with being with you
not only that, but complimenting
is a great segue into flirting,
which we'll get into a little bit later.
But there are different strategies
for complimenting a girl without being creepy
based on how well you know her
and what the setting is
and whether she's hot or not so hot.
Let's get right into it
one, situational.
So, you're going to have a different
set of complements to provide women
based on what the setting is.
It's going to be vastly different if you're meeting
a woman for the first time
in a bookstore or a coffee shop
versus a night club.
Right, like totally different settings.
So, first tip is about
thinking about what is her intention
for where she's at.
And another way of thinking about this as well
especially when we're going to talk
about physicality
what she looks like
is what is her intention
or what could be her intention
for what she's wearing to where she's at.
So, if you sort of start thinking...
About what her thoughts might be
before she went to that place
what she chose to put on her body
to go to that place
then you're going to have a better baseline
for where to pull your compliment from.
Two, hot versus not.
Attractive women get compliments
on their physical body
or their physical attributes a lot.
They're so used to it
they pretty much expected the hotter she is
the more often she's been complimented
on her looks.
And it comes across as being an original
when you go for something
that's just so used to hearing about
on the other end of the scale
women who are not hot
they're not used to getting
compliments on their looks
because they just don't give them
any compliments on their looks.
So, general rule of thumb
is you want to compliment hot or beautiful
really attractive physically women
on something other than their looks.
Something related to their personality
we'll go through some examples
in a little bit here.
And you want to compliment ugly chicks,
women who are not as syrio typically attractive
in society's eyes
on something physical about them.
Maybe you have beautiful eyes
or maybe they have amazing hair
or they have something about them physically
that is worth a compliment.
Number three, how well do you know her.
So, if you don't know her at all like
let's say you're standing in line waiting for your,
the barista to make your coffee
and she's kind of standing nearby
and waiting for her coffee,
then you want to stick with
the rule of thumb for hot or not
stay away from the T and A zones.
If you don't know what that is
somebody write it in the comments below
so we can educate the other guys.
Those are the no go zones
that you just really shouldn't talk about
until later.
I'm going to tell you later
when you should actually compliment her
on her T and A zones
when it's really, really welcomed.
So, stick around for that.
Now, if you do know her a little bit
like from work or social circles
or just in general
and you want to get out of
or avoid the friend zone
then you are going to
massage the rule of thumb
and you'll give her
a general compliment that's not physical.
And then you are going to give her
another compliment or a tease
that will create the flirt.
And I'm going to give you the details on that
in a little bit so stick around.
Tip number four, be sincere.
So, when you're giving a woman a compliment
you want to make sure that it's actually something
that you genuinely actually admire about her
because if you're not sincere
she's going to feel that
and she's going to feel the
incongruency of your words
and your interior beliefs,
which translates into
your internal intention with her.
And so, you want to make sure that
you're not just saying empty words
or complements that you found somewhere.
Maybe even on this video
later I'm going to give you some specifics.
But you want to make sure that
whatever you're complimenting on her
is actually something that you admire about her.
Some examples for this one are
if you don't know her
then you could say something like
hey, you know I don't know you
but I just wanted to tell you that,
that color looks amazing on you
really makes her eyes sparkle.
So, there's not a woman that's healthy
emotionally in the world
who isn't going to love that.
So, let's say you do know her
so what you might say
if you do know her a bit more casually
but you're not really dating
or you could be actually dating
but let's say you know each other
and you're or not dating.
You could say something like
hey, you know I've known you for a while
but I just wanted to say that,
that new dress really looks flattering on you.
You look great today
or you look especially great today.
Women are very sensitive to the nuances
if you say, you look great today
some women are going to automatically think
I didn't look so great yesterday?
So, if you say you look especially great today
that actually says to her that
she always looks good but then today she looks especially good.
Okay and you can use that on
your wives or girlfriends as well.
And along those lines,
if she is your girlfriend
or wife or long term partner
you can say babe, you look beautiful every day
but today, you look especially beautiful.
I really like that color on you
or that dress on you or that whatever.
And again, stick around
because I'm going to give you a pointer
on how to turn any
kind of innocent compliment into a flirt
that can lead to seduction.
Number five, be original.
So, doesn't matter how well you know her.
If you can come up with something that is original
and unexpected
then it's going to have more impact.
So, you want to choose something
that again you admire or respect.
And you can even throw those words in there
so for example,
choose something that you think
or you know that
she would be really proud of for herself.
So, you might say something like
wow, Ashley I just have to tell you that
I really admire your dedication.
And I have 100% respect
that I know you put in those extra hours
to get this project done on time.
Or you could say hey, Chloe.
You know something I really admire about you
is that you don't follow trends
but you always look stylish, respect.
So, this is a compliment you would use
if you actually know her a little bit or a lot
and you would just modify it slightly
if you are actually in relationship with her.
Number six, so after you've given the compliment
and she's replied
there's going to be this like little awkward moment
where it's like okay, now what do we say.
So, a good way of dealing with this
is to actually just redirect
so you're going to walk away from that
she's already basking in that compliment.
Now, unless she's had a really bad reaction
then just let it go but if it's been positive
or even neutral
then just switch gears
and talk about something completely different.
So, if you're in a coffee shop you might say
something like
you know, I always get the same thing.
I should really try something different
but you know, I'm just such a guy
who's into routine or whatever.
And then you might even
follow it up with something like
what about you? Like
does your barista have your name
on a particular type of coffee?
Or do you like to switch it up.
So, that's just a way to
get away from the compliment
and talk about something else
where you can actually engage in conversation
and avoid you know, that bit of weirdness
that you feel when you've just
given a girl a compliment without being creepy.
If you know her, you might and let's say you're
working together
you could say something like
I'm going to go grab coffee
do you want one or I'm going to go grab coffee
you want to join me?
You know, kind of keeping a casual
you're just redirecting from the compliment so that
she doesn't have to feel weird
because if you let it kind of hang there
then that's when it starts to feel creepy.
And speaking of creepy, make sure you stick around
because I'm going to give you the tips
three tips on when there's three times
you can use a compliment that's specific
about T and A her bits and parts.
But first let's look at number seven
her smile or her laugh.
If you see her smiling or laughing
or you've made her smile or laugh
definitely compliment her on her smile or laugh
this is one of three physical things
that you are generally safe
complimenting a woman on no matter what.
If you can guess what the other two are
write it in the comments below
and I will tell you later on.
Okay, along the lines of smiling is laughing
so if she's made you smile or laugh
especially if she's made you laugh
you want to tell her you want to compliment her
on making you laugh.
You want to say something like,
you're really funny I like that
and be a little bit mischievous about it
or have a little bit of a cocky grin
or something playful.
The reason why telling a girl you like
that she makes you laugh
is attractive for her about you
is because you're actually complimenting her
on her brain on the way she thinks.
Because to be able to make a guy laugh
is not something every woman can do.
It's actually quite a rare trait
that women are not as well known for.
So, if she has been able to make you laugh
and you tell her that you like that
and that she's funny she's really going to like that.
And she's going to want to make you laugh more.
Also, a little side note
laughing is contagious
and it also releases oxytocin,
which is the same hormone that you release
when you ohh, my goodness.
Yes, so if you can make her laugh
or she can make you laugh and you laugh together
and it's contagious
then you just released
something that's a feel good thing
that she's going to want more of
and she's going to associate with you
I know, I know
stick with me there's more.
However, this next one is actually a turn off.
So, if you compliment her in a manipulative way
only to get something from her
like what we just talked about,
then she's going to feel that
and it's going to be a turn off to her.
So, don't use canned compliments that you found on
some pickup artists site
that you can just use on
any old girl or young girl.
You want to make sure again that
you go back to whatever one that was
where you're actually being sincere.
Okay, so just before we get into
when you should
compliment a woman on her bits and parts
that are otherwise inappropriate to compliment on
let's go through one more thing
that is sometimes used in the pickup community,
but it's not a really good one to use.
And that's the back handed compliment
so it's almost like a neg where you're
giving her something and then you're taking it away.
So, it's something like
wow, Ashley you look
really amazing in that dress today
you must be looking for extra attention.
So, that's like saying she looks really good
but then it's because she's an attention ***.
So, that's not actually
a great compliment to give a girl.
Sometimes when you want to give and take away
so she has to work for something
you want to do it in a way that is more about
teasing and complimenting and then taking it away.
But it's something that you actually do
admire about her.
So, never tease her about something
that she's actually sincerely insecure about
or that you actually really don't like
because she's going to know that
and it's going to be creepy
when you do it wrong
you're basically insulting her in a bad way.
When you do it right you're enticing her
to want to win you over.
So, a different way
of saying that same statement might be
wow, Ashley that dress looks amazing on you today
are you looking to get extra attention from me today?
Or some extra love from me today or whatever.
So, if you play with that and make it playful wink
and you know fun
then it's not about her looking for extra attention
from just whomever.
It's her looking for attention from you
even though that might not be true
that's probably not true, it's not her intention.
Unless she does have a little secret crush on you,
but it makes it fun
and it adds that little bit of *** tension,
which will help keep you out of the friend zone.
And that brings us to
how to turn a compliment into a flirt,
which is exactly that whatever she has done
or said or worn or whatever
you add that little extra bit
did you do that just for me today?
Or did you wear that just for me today?
Or something along the lines
where you make it personal
about her doing something that pleases you.
By the way, these also work
in text format if you just modify a little bit I know.
Okay, using the T and A zones
three times when you can safely
compliment her on her bits and pots.
Okay, one is if she's in a situation
often at night not necessarily
where she is definitely throwing it all out there.
So, it might be like for example in a nightclub
or she's wearing a really low-cut blouse
and she's got some great cleavage
or maybe she's got amazing legs
or she's wearing like some kind of
something that really shows off
her amazing derriere.
And it's a setting where her intention
because you're thinking about her intention
before she got there,
is to get attention and it's undoubtedly for that
but that doesn't mean you're
going to go right out and say
hey, that dress makes your bleeps look amazing.
You're still going to be classy about it and say
wow, that dress is really flattering on you.
In fact, I’m really distracted by it
can you please repeat what you just said,
something like that.
And that way, it keeps it from being creepy.
Number two, if she has overtly
or no explicitly or inexplicitly
requested the compliment.
So, let's go back to the nightclub situation,
if she...
Let's say she's not wearing a super low cut top
but she's wearing something that's really tight
and shows off her figure,
she might say what do you think of this?
Again, you're going to stay classy
with the compliment on
the wow, that makes your figure look amazing.
It's distracting or something like that
or she might even overtly say
how does my butt look in these pants?
Well, she's asking you for the compliment
so you're allowed to give it to her.
You're allowed to give her the compliment
you're allowed to say your ***
looks amazing in those pants
or whatever, right.
If she outrates...
If she's the one that says the word,
the actual how do my *** look in this?
Ten you're allowed to say
you're *** look amazing in that.
So, that's the second time and then the third time
when you don't even actually
just need her permission
but you should compliment her bits and parts
are when you've actually been intimate together.
You've seen your each other's birthday suit
that's when she absolutely needs you
to compliment her bits and parts
and be really specific about it if you can.
Because women are insecure
when we first get...
Well, not all women but a lot of women
and even the ones that aren't insecure
they're still going to really appreciate
those kind of compliments.
And that is applicable
whether it's your first time together
or your 5,000th time together.
Always remember to compliment her
when you're being physically intimate.
Okay, if you're curious
about my favorite compliments
at least, favorite compliments
let's go through them.
Okay, least favorite compliment you're hot.
Next one, you're beautiful, you have great style,
you have a great personality, sense of humor
that one's okay.
Like yeah, okay I'll take it
that's something about more than what
God gave me.
Third one would be
I really appreciate the information you share
and agree with you validating my work I love that.
And then my most favorite,
my most favorite.
Your coaching has changed my life in these ways.
I love those if you have that story
send it to me.
Thank you for that and I will say that
some of you wonder why I give out hearts and love
to most of the compliments that I get, that I see,
and it's because
I know that they actually come from
a good place from good hearted men
and that you don't mean anything negative
or disrespecting by them.
I just prefer the other compliments
except for the T and A ones.
I can't give you hearts and loves on that
that's just inappropriate
you shouldn't compliment a woman online
that's an extra tid-bit for you.
You shouldn't compliment a woman online
with anything more
than what you would compliment her with in person
based on how well you know her,
the situation and how hot she is.
All right, thanks so much
I'll see you next week.
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