>>> LAST CALL, LADIES. IT'S TIME TO GO HOME
>> BARTENDER, GIVE ME MORE GROWN DEAN AND CAVIAR.
>> I WILL TAKE A MONSTAT 7 AND 7.
I GOT PLACES TO BE. >> ALL RIGHT.
MY CHILDREN ARE UNATTENDED. >> OH, I THOUGHT THE KENTUCKY
DERBY WAS LAST WEEK, BUT LOOKS LIKE THERE IS ANOTHER NAG AROUND
THE TRACK. WHY DON'T YOU MOUNT ME AND RIDE
ME TO VICTORY BEFORE THEY TURN ME INTO GLUE, HUH?
YOU MIND IF I MOVE A LITTLE CLOSER?
I'M SITTING ON WHAT I'M CHOOSING TO BELIEVE IS GUM.
>> SURE. LET ME JUST MOVE MY STOOL.
>> THERE, I'M READY. >> DID IT HURT WHEN YOU FELL
FROM HEAVEN AND I ASSUME YOU LANDED ON YOUR FACE?
>> GOOD ONE. >> IT WAS YOUR MOTHER A BEAVER,
YOU GOT A FLAT TAIL, FURRY FACE AND SMELL LIKE A LAKE.
>> THE CRAZY THING IS I USED TO FANTASIZE ABOUT SOMETHING LIKE
THIS. >> MY NAME IS SHEILA.
IF YOU MIX UP THE LETTERS, IT SPELLS WHOLE ASS VAG.
>> WHAT ARE ABOUT YOU? WHAT ARE THEY GOING TO WRITE ON
YOURS? >> OTHER THAN RIP?
RANCID IN PANTS. SEAL SUED ME FOR HAVING TO LOOK
AT MY FACE. >> GET OUT!
GET OUT. I SAW SEAL AT A CLUB.
EXCUSE ME, I CLUBBED A SEAL WITH A SAW.
IT DIDN'T WORK. HE LIVED.
I'M NOT WELCOME AT ANY BEACH. >> ALEXA, WHAT DO I DO?
>> KILL YOURSELF. >> WHEN I FIRST SAW YOU, I WAS
LIKE GOD NO. NOW I'M LIKE GOD, MIGHT AS WELL,
CAN'T FIND MY KEYS. >> WHEN I SAW YOU EARLIER, I WAS
LIKE SHOULD I DO SOMETHING? BUT THEN YOU GOT UP ON THE FLOOR
AND YOU SEEMED OKAY. >> THIS IS CRAZY.
SOMETHING'S HAPPENING HERE. >> YEAH, OH, YEAH.
>> WHAT DO YOU SAY WE GO BACK TO MY PLACE AND MAKE OUT, A LIVING
WILL. >> LET'S DO DOGGY STYLE.
THAT'S WHEN I RUN AWAY AND YOU WALK THROUGH THE NEIGHBORHOOD
SCREAMING MY NAME. >> LET'S DO THIS.
WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT.
BETTER SAFE THAN SORRY. >> OH, YEAH.
>> READY? >> THAT WAS UPAROUSING.
>> I JUST PITCHED A CAVE. >> HERE'S WHAT.
SINCE OUR POOTS ARE DRY AS BONE, WHY DON'T WE GET MOISTURE ON OUR
FACES WITH THESE AND WE DON'T HAVE TO LOOK AT EACH OTHER'S
ROSACEA. >> ONE, TWO, THREE, LET'S HIT
IT. >>
>> I GUESS THERE IS ONLY ONE OPTION LEFT.
GOOD THING I HID THIS THING FROM THE NAZIS.
♪♪♪