Signs your husband doesn't love you
anymore
and things that you should not do.
So this is a continuation of the first
video
which is just signs your husband doesn't
love you.
And in that video, we covered a lot of
points, not very deeply, but we covered a
lot of points.
In this video,
I want to tell you what not to do. I'm
Paul Friedman,
I founded The Marriage Foundation. The
Marriage Foundation
receives counselors requests -- it's a free
service that we have.
And so, my response now
is to many many requests that we get.
Those requests almost always
include someone saying, "I have done
everything that I could and my husband
is still
not responding."
Yes, I understand so I'd like you to
understand
how our counselors and I see a comment
like that.
When you say, "I've done everything that I
could,"
it's everything that you have thought
about.
It's not everything that I've thought
about or our counselors thought about
because your experience is limited
to that which you have heard that which
you have thought through yourself.
And unfortunately in this day and age,
all of that is influenced
by western psychology because western
psychology
has provided a false
road map for marriages for so many years
that their ideas have become
institutionalized,
accepted and they're mostly wrong.
Mostly wrong, that may
sound like an audacious statement
but you ask yourself.
If western psychologists know so much
about marriage
and it's their information that is
leading people to do the things that
they're supposed to do to save their
marriage,
why do they have a higher divorce rate
as a
group than the average?
And it's not just a little bit higher,
Personally, anecdotally
before I got into helping people with
their marriages,
I was a divorce mediator who got
virtually all of my clients
from? You guessed it.
Marriage counselors who failed.
And in retrospect, when I look
back at the people who I helped get a
divorce
amicably with
now what I know
I can't think of one couple that should
have gotten a divorce,
not one.
So basically, the reason their stuff does
not work
which is everything that is impacting
all the decisions
you're making is because
they are negatively trained towards
marriage.
They see marriage as one problem
after another. They don't have
in their minds what an ideal marriage
looks like. You can ask a marriage
counselor,
any of them, what is an ideal marriage?
And they will give you BS answers,
what is your answer to that question?
I'll tell you what the correct answer is.
The correct answer is the same answer
that you would have if you understood
marriage
for why you got married in the first
place.
Subconsciously, you got married in order
to be
happier every single day of your life.
Well, look at the nonsense that is out
there regarding happiness.
What does everyone
say?
They go, "The wedding day
is the woman's happiest day of her life."
The implication then is that from that
day forward it goes downhill. It
kind of crazy when you look at it that
way, isn't it
yet that's the truth.
Couples are already fighting before they
even get married.
Does an ideal marriage include fighting
yet western psychology promotes
a right way to argue. There is no right
way to argue when you're married.
There's only two of you in this
marriage. It's a soul
union. It's a union between two souls,
soulmates so you're in what I call
a sacred space of marriage,
your soul mates. But if you don't know
how to behave
which obviously, you don't if you're
questioning
if your husband loves you anymore.
Then what has happened has you have
dropped your relationship
down to a lower class relationship, it's
no longer
at the level of soulmates. It's at the
level of cell mates.
You're fighting, you're ignoring one
another,
there's coldness, there's harsh looks,
there's criticism in your mind.
There's criticism in your words.
There's criticism in your actions.
I've heard some incredible stories from
people
where the husband no longer loves his
wife
and he sabotages her.
What do you do? You can't follow
the western psychological principles
because they're negative. For instance,
they will say, well and it'll sound like
so much common sense. For instance
they'll say,
"Well, you should ask your husband."
No, you should not ask your husband
because if you can tell
and you can tell that your husband's
and let's change the context a little
bit
that the love for you that he
is displaying is
far from the love for you that he used
to display when you were dating.
Let's change the context into more
realistic because you don't know whether
he loves you or not.
Love again is at the level of the soul
which western psychology says is an
abstract thought
and I'm here to tell you, no, it isn't and
you know it isn't.
You are a soul. You don't have a soul. You
are a soul.
The proof of that is you experience love.
They say love is an emotion, abstract
thought again.
So you can't put it in a test tube so
you call it an
abstract thought and you pretend that
that love that you've felt
and still feel is not
reality. It's abstract. No, in fact
everything else is abstract. The love is
real
but neither of you learned how to
manifest
that in your marriage.
Neither of you learn going back
to the original premise that you got
married, that you get married to be
happier every day of your life.
Further, no one ever told you
this almighty truth
that part of the marriage promise
is that you will experience
unconditional
love which by definition, love
by definition is not a greater like.
Love is its own thing
and it has no boundaries.
We learned about infinity way back when
we were kids. Our minds cannot wrap
around
infinity. What else can your mind not
wrap around?
Your mind cannot wrap around love.
When you experience that love
your mind is lost in the dust
because you are a soul and your mind is
a material
thing and it can't keep up with the soul.
And when you're married, what you're
supposed to do is unite
these two souls, you
and your husband, but you have to do it
using the mind, using
your will, using your volition.
Now in the earlier video, I said
get one of my books. The books are fine
for about 20% of the people
because
there's too much information that you
need that is more
focused on bringing your souls back
together.
And so you really need the course for
women
that's what will do the trick for you
and it won't just
help your marriage a little bit.
No, it'll show you step
by step how to create the marriage that
you were supposed to have from day one
where you're experiencing happiness
continually increasing happiness
where you're experiencing love,
unconditional love that is
ever-expanding from the heart. You get
drunk with love when you know what
you're doing. You're walking around on
cloud nine when you know what you're
doing
and you are able to do this.
These western psychologists have no
clue,
none of them. If they did
all of them would be transformed
but they don't and the reason why
is actually kind of simple. It's not
their fault
but they are trained to look at problems.
Psychologists are trained to identify
mental illnesses
and their approach to dealing with those
mental illnesses
is wrong basically,
it's wrong. They don't
understand the core concept that you
are a soul who possesses a mind. This
mind belongs to you
which means -- I'm not implying
this, I'm telling you straight out. It
means you're responsible
for every single thought, every single
feeling, every single everything that's
going
on up there is up to you. Now,
do we master the mind? Very few
over the course of a lifetime though as
we make the continual effort
to master the mind, continual effort the
rewards
are phenomenal. You don't have to master
the mind to
enjoy that mental bliss that is really
the soul
bliss that is gained
by learning how to love unconditionally.
It's what you need to learn and the
western psychologists don't have a clue
about that
because they see the soul and love is
abstract thoughts
so they get into the problems. They have
this negative approach
and it's crazy because what they're
doing is they're blaming
everybody in everything, circumstances,
what happened to you as a child, what
happened to your husband as a kid,
all of these things are now deciding
your
fate, nonsense.
You decide your fate every second.
You control your thinking. You control
your feelings. You control what your mind
will do
but you do have to learn what is
influencing your mind.
This is why that course is so important
for you to take,
not just so you could have a better
marriage, not just so you could
save your marriage, that's not good
enough. I want you to have the same kind
of marriage that
I have, the same kind of a marriage that
thousands of our clients over the past
20 years
now have where you are in charge
where the happiness that you
have is tangible. The love that you
feel is the most tangible
of all of your experiences in life.
This is a very important message
because it contradicts
all of the other messaging out there
that is
so negative and keeps us
enslaved in these dramas,
these awful feelings, these insecurities,
these negative judgments.
It's an imprisonment that you can break
out of and enjoy that which
you're meant to enjoy by getting married.
Marriage is so unique.
In this whole world wherever you go
everyone wants something from you.
In marriage, you're supposed to give
and give and that love just flows
through
and it's so unique because when you give
to your husband,
and when your husband gives to you
you're giving to the
same entity. The marriage,
you should be swimming in joy.
I once heard a poem "aye a tiny bubble of
laughter
have become the sea of mirth itself,"
very lofty. It's all about love.
It's all about love my dear.
Learn and apply,
learn and apply. Get comfortable
with this idea. Subscribe to the channel
so you hear more and more messages
that are akin to this one. It's a very
positive message about marriage.
It's not negative. It's not labeling your
husband. It's not putting him down. It's
not putting you
down. It's talking about what you
have right in front of you and how
to make that happen.
And with that, my blessings to you,
my wish for you to achieve
the gold of marriage, the love