Hello brains!
Ever wonder why I don't post much on Instagram?
This is my version of a bathroom selfie.
I was there for five minutes.
Now, imagine my house.
[INTRO MUSIC]
ADHD brains tend to be messy
It's not that we don't try it's that we've got a lot working against us.
So, clutter happens when life gets busy and we get overwhelmed clutter happens a lot.
Unfortunately, all this clutter can make things feel even more chaotic and stressful than they actually are.
It isn't just our overwhelm that adds to clutter, the clutter adds to our overwhelm.
Which makes us avoid the clutter, which creates more clutter, which adds to the overwhelm, which makes us avoid the clutter, which creates more clutter-
Which adds to the overwhelm, which makes us avoid the clutter, which creates more clutter, which adds the overwhelm...
It's a vicious cycle, but it's one we can break. How? With help.
In the past, I've reached out to friends
I've found systems that helped. I've given up on those systems and found new ones, that also didn't work.
I've sat on the couch beating myself up for being the only woman I know who can't keep her house clean.
Currently I'm working with professional designers who understand ADHD,
because one of them has it and the other one is her sister
and one of the most helpful things they taught me is something I want to share with you:
Some level of clutter is inevitable
I'm gonna say that again because for me it was really reassuring to hear.
Some level of clutter is inevitable.
So rather than focusing on an unrealistic standard of perfection we or the ADHD brains we live with
can't possibly maintain, or maybe even feel comfortable with,
it helps to figure out how different types of clutter affect us and then put systems into place
that makes sense based on that.
Actually, I'll let the designers explain.
Just like we have different favorite colors, one person's clutter can be another person's creative inspiration.
So our first step isn't to condemn clutter and get rid of it but to figure out what you need or want in any given place.
There are two main categories that we could talk about today that exist for everyone.
That is clutter in motion, and clutter and stasis.
Living your life takes things out of place
But what we've noticed is that this sort of clutter is often tolerable or even cozy.
It might look messy on an Instagram post, but it can feel good to see the books
you're reading stacked next to the couch.
But there's a point where if you don't put them away they aren't in motion anymore. This has become clutter in stasis.
So basically clutter in stasis is clutter that is out of place for so long that you've started to treat it like it's not there.
You're working around it potentially shuffling it off to the side when it's in the way it's being treated like a permanent fixture.
Sometimes clutter in stasis happens because the thing doesn't have a place.
As parents, one of the major sources of this kind of clutter is the stuff our kids bring home from school.
So much paper! So much art!
Exactly.
So this could be one source of the infamous piles that so many of us have shuffling around from one corner or closet to another.
Another type of clutter in stasis comes from having a need that isn't met in that space.
There's a lot you can put into place to do with both types of clutter but the strategies are different.
If you have clutter and stasis you can ask, "Does this have a place?" and "Is there a reason I don't put it there?"
Something as simple as a well-placed laundry basket or trash bin or a tray table that makes it easy to clear coffee cups out of the living area,
can have a big impact on keeping clutter in motion from turning into clutter and stasis.
And analyzing your piles separately from the general clutter can help you figure out what it is that has no place.
Rather than becoming overwhelmed looking around your whole home and trying to think why everything doesn't have a place,
you can simply go to your most permanent areas of mess and say, "what is in here?"
"Why is it in here?" It's amazing how effective this can be
So yeah, we can't get rid of clutter completely
but we can work toward making sure that what's in our space is what we want to be in our space.
And that's gonna be different for everyone. Some people might like displays with lots of knickknacks while others prefer minimalism.
But some of us really don't know what we prefer because we're so used to our place just being a mess.
While working with Carmen and Leonor I figured out that what I need and want in my office is
very different from what I thought "should" be in my office. Like office supplies.
I don't use paper-clips. Paper-clips end up in a pile I shove off to the side that becomes clutter in stasis.
Do you know what I go looking for?
I do because they had me fill out a worksheet about it. For me blankets are office supplies, and they're clutter in motion.
This is also clutter in motion. And this is how I keep it from becoming clutter in stasis.
I also realized I really hate what I call "tech clutter", while they actually like cozy clutter.
Even though I don't need five stuffed animals in addition to the actual animal I have in my space.
It helps me balance out my "tech stuff" to "not tech stuff" ratios
so that my space feels less overwhelming. This didn't happen magically. I didn't stop having ADHD. I got help
And it was so helpful, I asked them if they would help you too.
They made a worksheet similar to the one they had me fill up except this one is designed for you to use or on your own.
There's a link to it in the description. fill it out,
share it with the people you live with! I hope it's helpful.
And if you need more help, whether from a friend or a professional, don't be ashamed to ask for it
I wasted a lot of my life being ashamed of how my ADHD symptoms affected me.
I think it's a lot more helpful to be proud of the steps I'm taking to manage it.
Thank you to my brain board and all my patreon brains for making all of this possible
I honestly couldn't do it without you like subscribe click all the things and I will see you next video. Bye Brains!