The merger of Traction eRag and Cross Training Enduro has created
one of the largest evil empires ever known.
We have offices opening in Australia, Canada, Africa and right across the globe.
And of course we are recruiting the finest executives.
But of course most dirt riders are soft whining little nancy boys.
So soon we have prepared a training vid on how to manage any hurt feelings our evil empire causes.
And we'd like to announce our new complaints department,
just take a number and step into our concrete bunker...
I mean waiting room.
Next?
Fill in our hurt feelings report.
Be sure to include your type of whining.
The date your feelings were hurt.
The person who hurt your pansy ass feelings.
And which ear the hurtful words were spoken into.
And remember we take your hurt feelings seriously.
Let us know if you need a hug, or at least a tissue to cry into.
Blankets, pacifiers and a warm bottle of milk can be supplied on request.
And finally, Traction eRag's head of security,
Chuck Harder, is available to provide counselling for your hurt feelings.
But seriously, it's good to see there are so few complaints about the vids
from whining demanding spoiled brats nowadays.
There are still a lot of requests for personal recommendations on which bike they should buy,
or which oil, tyres or suspension settings to use.
Of course I can't answer... and they should be doing their own research.
Complaints give me the shits, but on the other hand constructive feedback is always great.
For example, the topic of racism came up after posting dodgy vids like this....
A dirt rider originally from Vietnam asked me what the message behind this video was.
He felt it could be easily interpreted as racist so he was interested to see what the meaning was.
My response?
It is meant to be ironic.
Over the years I have constantly joked about national stereotypes, particularly Australians,
and just making fun of how we have such narrow views of different cultures.
Of course it gets even more ironic if somebody doesn't get the irony.
But of course if a significant number of viewers with an Asian background
complained I would probably have to stop messing around with stereotypes.
Another interesting case was referring to "Jap" bikes for any dirt bike made in Japan.
In Australia and other countries this is simply shorthand for Japanese.
But apparently some people in the USA find this racist.
While I was in Canada I spoke with quite a few people about this and got a range
of responses from "Ah that's just the loonie left guys in the States" to "Yeah
that would be considered racist by some people, maybe you should drop that term".
It's all very interesting stuff, trying to find the middle ground
between political correctness gone mad, and genuinely offending some viewers.
I'd be very interested to hear from any viewers with a Japanese background.
If anyone is offended by oversize genitals, please fast forward over this segment.
How did this happen? I've been trying one of the dodgy products I sell.
By the way, Traction eRag is run by volunteers so if you are very good at
masturbating and any of media stuff mentioned here, feel free to apply.
It's wrecked my life, you can wreck yours too.
What else?
Some of you will know I've got an old adventure riding channel as well.
I've just started posting a few vids there from a very cool four day ride in Vietnam this year.
If you can handle some road riding video then feel free to check it out.
See you all later, chaps.
And chapettes.