- Five simple but powerful words,
and if you ingrain them into your relationships,
you'll attract more men, and you will be far more powerful
in any relationship than you've ever been in the past.
And no, this isn't a (beep) clickbait. Keep watching.
(vogue music)
Now, statistically speaking, men are actually
more likely to fall in love before a woman.
But if you do find yourself wanting a man to fall for you,
then don't forget these five words. They're gonna help you
unlock a man's heart and make him want you.
And I boiled them down to one single word,
so they're really easy to remember,
and they're really easy to implement into your life.
Number one: You.
Now, I believe that the definition of a great relationship
is when both people put in,
they focus their energy on the other person.
And I found, throughout my life,
and also being a dating coach, that there are basically
two different relationship archetypes.
The first one are those types of people
who get in a relationship in order to get something.
Whether it's get a feeling, they wanna
feel love from that person, they wanna get that,
or they want to get someone to show off to their friends,
or finally just have someone--
get someone who can entertain them.
And then, the second archetype
are those who want a relationship
in order to give something; in order to give their love;
in order to give their devotion;
in order to give their emotion
and their time into the relationship.
And if he's giving in the relationship,
he's giving his time, his energy, his resources,
and putting everything he can into the relationship.
And you're doing the same, you're being thoughtful,
you're doing everything you can to make his life better.
Then, ultimately, the whole becomes so much greater
than the sum of two parts.
And that really is the definition of a healthy relationship,
is when both people focus their energy on the other person,
and ultimately both are so much better off
for being in that relationship.
But keep in mind, if you find yourself in a relationship
who's not focusing their energy on you back,
then you need to realize this, it's not going to get better.
If you're finding you're the only person investing yourself
into the relationship, it's time to really take a hard look
as to whether or not this is what you want.
So, leave a comment below if you ever been in a relationship
where you're the only one giving.
I'd love to hear from you in the comments.
The second word that's gonna make a man completely want you
and fall in love with you is "yes."
Now, according to a fascinating study
that was conducted by the University of West Minster,
they found that, basically, a woman's physical appearance
is less of a deciding factor for attracting the opposite sex
so long as the woman is positive.
On the other hand, if she's a very negative person,
and she's unattractive, then it becomes substantially
more difficult to attract a mate.
So, essentially, the deciding factor to be able to attract
a great person is not all coming down to looks.
What's more important is being with someone who's positive,
who's a positive influence in your life,
and I can tell you, back when I was single,
there was so many women who might be physically attractive,
but I just got this incredibly negative vibe from them.
Whether it's their body language,
or I could tell they just weren't happy,
and the moment that I got that feeling,
I immediately wanted to just kinda back away,
and kinda look somewhere else.
Word number three is "I."
Now, you've been told a lie
from fairy tales and movies growing up.
When you finally meet a great person,
a great partner, or "the one" in your life,
it doesn't mean that you finally found your better half,
it really just means that you found someone
to supplement your already incredible life.
And I think a lot of relationship advice out there
really caters to the type of people
who wanna get lost in a relationship,
who are willing to lose their sense of self,
who are willing to lose their sense of "I,"
and as part of Sexy Confidence,
I'm such a strong advocate.
It really-- not forgetting who you are
and continue to build up who you are as a person,
and being willing to stay independent of that person.
It doesn't mean that, of course,
you don't wanna spend a ton of time with that person,
and share yourself wholly to your partner,
but at the same time, you really don't want to
lose every part of who you are,
and just give into that person.
Word number four is "Thanks."
A recent study by a psychologist
at the University of North Carolina,
basically found that on days when partners
reported feeling more grateful
for their significant other's acts of kindness,
or the things that they did, they also reported feeling
much more connected to that person.
And I can speak to this personally,
I find that if Jessica and I ever get into a fight,
or disagreement, we make sure that not shortly, thereafter--
I know it's cheesy, but we will kind of actually sit,
especially before dinner, every once in a while
we'll do this and just say, "What are three things
that you're grateful for?" And always, if both of us
are at least saying one nice thing about the other person,
one thing that we're grateful for in our partner,
but just gratitude, in general, in life
has a way of just kind of washing away all the bull (beep),
all the things that you think you care about,
and it really kind of boils down
to the most important things in your life.
And there's a lot of psychology that goes into this
where the moment that you start focusing on the things
that are important and the things that really matters to you
are the moment that you stop stressing
about the things that don't.
And the fifth word is "no."
"No" is actually one of the strongest words
in the dictionary, and I found with a lot of women
when they start to fall for a man,
or they're really interested in a man,
they want to say yes to everything, right?
They don't want to, you know, kind of ruffle the feathers,
or make him feel like, you know, he's saying something
that you disagree with, so you always say,
"Yes, yes," and show interest, but actually,
the type of woman who really attract men,
and kind of pique their interest, are the type of women
who are willing to say no, who are willing to
call a guy on his bullshit. So, don't be afraid to do that,
okay, don't be afraid to say no to a man
even if you're attracted to him.
Believe it or not, it's an incredible attractive quality,
the type of woman who's willing to step up to the plate.
And I'm gonna throw in a bonus that you can do
that is going to make a man absolutely addicted to you.
Here's the word-- (crickets chirping)
Listening. Listening is such an important part
of falling in love because as we fall in love,
and as we really connect with someone
on a more deep emotional level, we have a need to be heard,
and you have a need to heard as well.
So, you want-- and justly, you want to be with a man
who listens to you, and is willing to kind of
take a step back and stop doing all the talking.
Men also want to feel that same level of connection.
And I've actually found that, especially when it comes
to just bonding with someone,
even as friendship platonically,
the best way to make that person
bond to you is not by talking,
it's actually just by asking them questions,
getting them talking about themselves and opening up to you.
And before you know it, they're gonna feel like
they know you so well, even if they've done all the talking,
they're gonna feel completely connected to you.
So, thank you so much for watching this video.
If you enjoyed it, please give it a like on YouTube,
and also don't forget to subscribe on YouTube,
and also leave a comment right there below
with the word that is most important to you,
the thing that you need to work on the most
in your relationships, and maybe you haven't done 'em much
in the past, but I want to hear from you right there below.
And finally, don't forget to head on over
Sexy Confidence dot com. We have a ton of amazing resources
that'll help you through every single stage of dating,
relationships, and love. You can click that-- that button
right there, and thank you so much for watching,
and I'll speak to you, you sexy single lady,
next week. Bye-bye.