Translator: Elisabetta Siagri Reviewer: Tanya Cushman
I would be so privileged if you would allow me,
for the few minutes that you've given me,
to be your mom,
your grandma,
your great-grandma.
(Laughter)
I have four generations.
What a joy for me to be here with you.
And with your permission,
I'm going to take you on a ride.
I want to share with you what my mom told me
that truly, truly changed my life - the past and the present.
The time is 1944.
My dad, my sister Magda and I
and my mom,
we were on our way to Auschwitz.
And my mom held me, and this is what she said.
She said, "We don't know where we're going.
We don't know what's going to happen.
Just remember,
no one can take away from you what you put here in your own mind."
And this is exactly what happened.
We arrived in Auschwitz.
I saw the sign. I didn't know where I was.
My father was separated,
and I stood in front of Doctor Mengele, "the Angel of Death."
He pointed my mom to go to the left
and my sister and I to the right.
I followed my mom,
and he grabbed me, looked me in the eye -
that I never forget that look -
and he said: "You're going to see your mother very soon;
she's just going to take a shower,"
and promptly threw me on the other side -
which meant life.
I suffered so many years from survivor's guilt and shame,
wondering, "Why me?"
There were people who were so much prettier than I was.
I had two very beautiful sisters,
and after two beautiful sisters, my parents wanted a son,
and guess what happened!
They got me,
and I was the runt in my family.
My sisters took me for a walk,
and they blindfolded me because I was cross-eyed.
Today, I speak at schools.
I'm really guiding the precious children
not to allow anyone to define who you are.
You're beautiful because God doesn't make junk.
And so, here I was asking - it was called Birkenau -
I asked one of the inmates, "When will I see my mother?"
She pointed at a chimney,
and she said to me very coldly, "She's burning there."
So there was no help from the outside,
but I still had my mind and my sister Magda.
She was the pretty one in my family, the sexy one.
And when we were completely shaved,
she came to me with hair in her palms and said, "How do I look?"
It's a Hungarian woman's question -
we're pretty vain -
and I knew and I discovered
Auschwitz was all about discovering traits I never thought were possible.
And instead of telling Magda how she really looked,
I found something, something that she still had left,
and I said to her, "Magda, you have such beautiful eyes,
and you know,
I really didn't see it when you had your hair covering your eyes."
So I hope that you're going to relate tonight.
Pay attention to the kind of words that you put in your mind
so you can empower someone
and see in which way I can be your guide tonight.
Doctor Mengele
appeared in our barracks
and looked for the talents,
and my friends volunteered me
because I was a student of ballet.
I was a good gymnast.
I danced for the president of Hungary, Admiral Horthy,
and I found myself in front of Doctor Mengele, dancing.
And again, my mind was with me, and I was able to check out,
and I pretended that the music was Tchaikovsky
and I was dancing the Romeo and Juliet at the Budapest Opera House.
He gave me a piece of bread, which I shared with my girls.
Life was really difficult in Auschwitz
because we never knew what's going to happen next.
We didn't know when we took a shower
whether water is going to come out or gas is going to come out.
And then, what we had to do is, again, somehow survive.
I remember we stood in line every morning, four o'clock,
and I, I began to fantasize about my boyfriend.
And I said to myself, "If I survive today, then tomorrow I'll be free."
Tomorrow, tomorrow - always looking ahead.
And I learned to say - instead of "Why me?" -
"What now?" and "What next?"
I had a tremendous curiosity that really was so powerful
that I was able to make it day by day.
But we had to be committed to each other;
otherwise, we never would have made it.
Cooperation was the name of the game.
Not competition, not domination
because all we had was each other then
and all we have is each other now.
In December,
they took me out of Auschwitz.
I became a slave laborer,
and I was transported to a place called Mauthausen to enter a death march.
And in a death march, when you stopped, you were shot right away.
And while I was just about to collapse myself,
and my friends, whom I shared the bread with,
they came and they formed a chair with their arms,
and they carried me so I wouldn't die.
Isn't that amazing?
That the worst conditions can bring out the best in us?
I was liberated May 4th - it's coming up - 1945,
by the 71st Infantry.
I was so privileged
that I am working now with the military, doing work with PTSD.
I was invited to Fort Carson, Colorado City,
and I realized when I arrived that it's the home of the 71st Infantry.
You see how life comes around?
And now, today, as I'm standing here in front of you,
I can tell you I have nothing but gratitude.
We don't seem to appreciate, sometimes, what we have until we lose it.
Every morsel of food.
The walk on this beautiful beach.
I never throw out a piece of bread.
If you take me out to dinner, chances are I may eat up your leftovers.
It's really painful for me, my daughter keeps telling me
and my precious grandson, Jordan.
Please, let people know that beauty of mine.
Come on, stand up, Jordan! Jordan!
(Applause)
That's the best revenge! That's the best revenge - my kind!
That's all.
Not only do I have three children;
I have five grandchildren and three beautiful great-grandsons.
That's revenge - my kind.
But I was not really able to have the joy and the compassion
until I was able to return to Auschwitz,
until I was able to go back to that lion's den
and look at the lion in the face -
until I was able to somehow reclaim my innocence,
assign the shame and guilt to the perpetrator
and finally forgive myself that I survived.
You see, revenge gives you satisfaction,
but I think it's very temporary.
It just saps you of so much energy.
But forgiveness - believe me -
has given me the ultimate, the ultimate spiritual freedom.
So, as I stand here in front of you today,
I can tell you that I'm so blessed today
that I can guide people from darkness to light,
from prison to freedom
and to find that, perhaps,
the biggest concentration camp is right in your own mind
and the key is in your pocket.
What keeps me young today?
That I live in the present
because I can only touch you now.
If you'd please like to hold hand in hand.
We all have a little skin hunger.
So please touch, hold hands!
And I, too, believe somehow, as I am able to stand here,
look at you precious young people,
that you are the future.
With TED, you and I can empower each other with our differences
and never kicking each other into submission
because that would be the beginning of the end
of the beautiful democracy that I came to this country for.
So just remember, you can make a difference.
And remember my mom's words,
that everything can be taken away from us
except what you put in your own mind.
So I hope that you will be very careful and very selective
with the words that you can put in your mind
so your life would be as beautiful as mine has become,
and you and I can truly celebrate
the beautiful gift that God has given us called life.
Thank you!
(Applause)