*Rage Quit Intro*
Michael: Co-Op QWOP, Qwa, Qwa-
Gavin: Qwo-Op
Michael: Qwo-Op
Gavin: Lets do QWOP
Michael: So, Gavin and I are sharing a keyboard. He has "U" "I" "O" and "P" on the bottom screen
Gavin: And you have 'queer'
Michael: I have-GAVIN, NO!
Gavin: So, are we competing or what? What are we doing Michael: Yeah, we're competing
Michael: I'm gonna beat your asshole. You see the timer on the right
Michael: This is just...
*Gavin Laughing*
Michael: Ya know, because fucking QWOP was so much fun, let's see this retarded asshole fucking fly to the moon on 2 screens at once
Gavin: He's flippier than normal. Is he flippier
Michael: I can't even go forward. I've--this--I'm somehow worse than I was
Gavin: I'm gonna see if I can do the splits...not like that
Michael: Why is it even 2 of the exact same guys? You couldn't find 2 different fucking people to compete in this bullshit
Michael: Only one person on the planet will play this fucking game. Is it much of an Olympic sport? There's one guy.
Michael: WHO THE HELL GETS SILVER AND BRONZE
*Gavin Laughing*
Gavin: Its the exact same 2 brothers
Gavin: How did I move my arm
Gavin: It looks like I just took a sip of drink Michael: I don't know. I-I-I-don't know what the fuck I'm doing
Gavin: Who's winning
Michael: How did this game get harder? I just keep falling on my fucking head. He just keeps falling over like a dumb shit. Oh wait
Gavin: See, what I'm trying to do....
Michael: Wait wait. I'm fucking-I'm going backwards
Gavin: What I'm trying to do is- Michael: HE DID A FUCKING FLIP
Michael: Round 2
Gavin: I'm gonna try to tease my guy into the split and then do a little toe shimmy
Michael: USE YOUR FUCKING LEGS YOU FFFFUCK! THIS IS--MY GUY WAS DOING THE WORM! HE WAS WORMING IT!
Michael: The whole fucking reason the game is called "QWOP" is because its "Q" "W" "O" "P" but with 2 players--I have the "Q" "W" and you have "O" "P" so I don't even know what the fuck's happening
Michael: My hands are so close together. I'm like, jerking the fucking keyboard off
Gavin: I'm doing what's called the "Knee Shift"
Michael: Holy fuck, YOU HAVE 5 FUCKING METERS? Gavin: I might break the sound barrier. [Joyously] Loooook at this. [More Joyous] Look at this Michael!! Michael: Oh fucking bullshit Gavin: *squealing* Look at this
Michael: COME ONNNNN
Gavin: Teasing it. Teasing it. I--I've-- got--oh my God. Who's that Michael: WHAT THE FUCK Gavin: Is that you Michael: ARE YOU RUNNING TOWARDS ME Gavin: *Childish Squeal* AHHHHH Michael: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS Gavin: I'm gonna kick you in the face
Michael: WE'RE ON THE SAME TRACK? WE'RE ON THE SAME FUCKING TRACK! WHAT THE FUCK?
Gavin: I was like 'Who's that' I won
Michael: I see the...uh...the graphics have dramatically improved. Also, the sound: impeccable
*Gavin Laughing*
Michael: How did you do that? You went 4 meters from that
Gavin: I did a 4 meter front flip while going backwards and forewards
*Michael's Noises of Rage*
Gavin: Woop
Michael: This game is so fucking annoying
Gavin: See, what happens is: you do something good-*Is Interrupted by Michael's Rage*--you do something good but your brain doesn't remember the thing that you did and my brain is just rejecting all of this
Michael: I CAN'T MOVE PAST THE FUCKING STARTING LINE
Gavin: So, you just kicked the table and it bounced the mic foot into my nose
Michael: Good. Your nose is fucking huge by the way Gavin: Alright. Chill chill
Michael: I CAN'T STOP HIM FROM DOING A FUCKING STARTING BACKFLIP
Gavin: Oh wait. Were you at the Finish Line or were you at your Start Line Michael: I WAS AT THE START
Gavin: Oh so.... Michael: You ran to my fucking Finish Line Gavin: Ohhhh
Michael: Did you see that? Did you see that? I did a complete fucking somersault. I should've been able to keep going.
Michael: Tuck and Roll you piece of shit
Gavin: I'm not being funny: I'm getting caked in saliva. My arm is a--a mush.
Michael: Well that's what happens when so close to the Blast Zone
Michael: BOTH BUTTONS MAKE HIM GO BACWARDS
Gavin: I'm gonna kick you in the dick
Michael: WHAT ARE WE WATCHING? CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT PEOPLE ARE LOOKING AT? ITS 2 FUCKING RETARDS JUST FLIPPING THROUGH SPACE Gavin: Wow
Michael: [Imitating Game] Eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh.Fucking make a remix outta it. Dubstep. "Eh" from fucking QWOP
Both: Oohhh Michael: [Making Mocking Noises at Gavin] Shut Up
Michael:Fuuuuck
Gavin: Oh...so, that line is me. Is it? Michael: What? Gavin: No, its you.Nevermind
Michael: NO! I ALMOST HAD IT! DID YOU SEE THAT FLIP I DID
Gavin: Oh, I've nailed it .I've figured out Michael: No. No you haven't Gavin: My brain has--nope
Michael: Yeah, you've it figured out
Michael: I can't do it
Gavin: It does get to the point where--
Michael: *Screams in Frustration* FUCK
Gavin: Ow. You've smashed my hand
*Gavin Snickers*
Gavin: My finger's gone mushed.
Michael: This dude looks like the guy that's in all the pictures in The Kamasutra from the way he bends and shit
Gavin: I've never read The Kamasutra
Michael: Yeah well you know...why would you? Virgin
Michael: Come on. Come on. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop
Gavin: How I even got here is unbelievable
Michael: HOWWW? HOW DO YOU GO FORWARD? HOW ARE YOU GONNA PLAY QWOP? I'M PLAYING FUCKING QWER
Michael: I'm not playing QWOP! GAVIN'S PLAYING FUCK UUUAUUUUA
Gavin: I'm playing UIOP
Michael: This guy is like Taylor Jones. He can't jump than 2 fucking feet
Gavin: [Singing] Here comes Tayor Jones
Michael: [More Game Imitation] Eh eh eh eheheh eheheheheh. There's--there's--Its--just mash buttons
Gavin: How do his legs propel him so upside down? Oh, he's gonna take it in the end. He's taking it Michael: I went backwards. HOW'D I DO THAT? C'MON Gavin: [Victory Screech] He's taking it
Michael: NO.NONONONONO. YOU SON OF A BITCH
Gavin: [Victory Screech] Michael: You son of bitch. THIS GAME IS A PIECE OF SHIT! WHY WOULD YOU EVER MAKE THIS CO-OP? WHY WOULD YOU MAKE THIS 2 PLAYERS