Heya playa, when it comes to liking someone that's the easy part.
It comes natural to us.
But if we're talking about interacting with them, talking to them and asking them out,
that can be a little bit more tricky.
So if you're the kind of person that overthinks that approach, overthinks how you should talk
to them.
I'm going to explain in very simple details how you can get started and what you can do.
This is The Josh Speaks.
You're watching The Josh Speaks.
For those of you that are new here, my name is Josh and every single Monday through Friday
I make videos sharing tips, ideas and stories teaching you how to be your best self.
Now when it comes to making that first move, it's never an easy thing to do because there's
always that fear of rejection on the other side.
We don't know how to start that conversation, we don't know what to say, we don't know how
to respond, there's so many unknown factors here that we can just end up spending the
whole time in our heads thinking about how everything will go wrong.
And if you're in that position, there are three simple things that you can do to start
just to get the ball rolling with your crush.
Just to get to them acknowledge you and for you to acknowledge them so you guys can have
some kind of interaction.
First things first, focus on making eye contact.
Making eye contact allows you to establish a presence with them.
They recognize that you're there and you recognize that they're there.
No one's kind of looking down or looking away or pretending that they don't see the other
person.
And if you want to make your eye contact mean something, making sure to hold that gaze with
them for a few seconds.
Don't just look at them and as soon as they look back look away because doing that displays
a lack of confidence.
So, by holding that eye contact gaze, you're showing them that I'm confident enough to
keep looking at you.
Now you don't just want to stare at them because that can be kind of creepy so along with looking
at them, make sure to smile.
So many people keep a deadpan face when they look at someone but smiling establishes rapport,
it shows them that you're welcoming, you're inviting them, and that you're happy to even
be looking at them.
Because to them, there's a major difference between a smiling person looking at them and
a not smiling person looking at them.
And the difference is pretty obvious.
One of them looks friendly and the other looks like a psycho crazy killer that's gonna attack
them.
See what I mean?
Looking and smiling are good but in order to make that interaction great you have to
establish some kind of verbal communication with them.
So simply saying hey, how's it going, what's up or any of those types of variations makes
a difference.
Now some of you may see your crush from a distance or they're off hanging out with friends
or they're just kind of sitting alone and you're not really sure how to approach them.
You don't know how to build up the confidence to kind of pick up your own two stone feet
that are attached to the ground and just start moving them over to your crush.
So in those cases, I would simply follow the three-second rule.
Like I mentioned in a previous video, the three-second rule is as simple as this, as
soon as you spot your crush, give yourself no more than three seconds to walk up to them
and say hi.
Usually what happens is when a person spots their crush, they see them, they want to talk
to them but they never actually start moving towards them so they just sit there and start
over thinking "Well, what am I gonna say when I get there?
How are they gonna respond?
Am I gonna look weird, is it gonna be awkward?".
All these different thoughts creep into your mind because you've never actually walked
up and took the initiative to go talk to them in that moment.
Trust me on this walking up to them and talking to them will give you much better results
than if you were to just stand in the background and think things over in your head.
When you think things over, you're never going to reach a positive outcome but in person,
that's something that might actually happen.
And the purpose here isn't for you to walk up to your crush and say hi to them and suddenly
they're in love with you, they want to go out with you and you guys are dating.
It's simply to establish a rapport.
To build a connection with them, to get them to at least acknowledge you.
The most effective way to overcome overthinking is to replace it with action.
Once you take action, you now have an outcome to actually work with.
Ok you made eye contact, you smiled, you followed the three-second rule and walked up over to
them and you said hi, now what do you do?
How do you actually carry a conversation and what do you talk to them about.
Well, this is exactly why I put together my 20 icebreaker conversation starters.
In the guide, I break down 20 different things that you can say to kind of carry a conversation
forward.
Each of these things focuses on kind of just learning a little bit more about that person's
personality.
Kind of really breaking down that awkward tension you guys have and just making things
more light-hearted and open.
For example, once you've gone over all the other steps and you've already said hi, you
might want to lead into a story/question and say something like "Hey, my parents are thinking
about getting a cat or a dog so I wanted to get your opinion.
Which is a better house pet?".
Your crush will give their answer and then from there you can take it in a million other
directions.
You can ask them if they're ever had a pet growing up, what's a really good pet name,
or anything of that nature.
You can even shift the conversation to something else from the ice-breakers starters guide.
The point is, if you're the kind of person that's overthinking making that first move
it's not as difficult as you think it is.
All you have to do is take each little step.
Check them off as you go through them and as you interact more and more with your crush,
you'll start to see how easy it is to just start a conversation with another human being.
I know the fear is still there and I know it's very real but I think this is the most
practical way that you can approach this situation for it to work as effectively as possible.
But what do you think, are you someone that overthinks making the first move when it comes
to talking to your crush?
Leave your comments down below and we'll talk about it.
Now if you enjoyed the video hit the thumbs up button and let me know.
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new video.
All week long we're going to be talking about overthinking so if that's something you struggle
with you're definitely gonna wanna check out the videos I have later on in the week.
On that note guys, I'll catch you tomorrow.
As always, love and peace.