This might be a stupid question, but what is it like to NOT be depressed?
Instead of the "What's even the point" kind of not-getting-out-of-bed, you get the "It's too warm in these covers" kind of not-getting-out-of-bed
I used to think that I lacked time, but it turned out I lacked energy.
I used to stay at home and study when I could, but after 2 years of antidepressants my schedule looks like this:
I get up at 6 and don't feel like death.
I go to class and study at home.
I actually make time for friends, my hobbies and even go to the gym.
At the end of the day, I'm not mentally tired, but just ready for bed.
I have never been so productive in my entire life, and make use of every single hour in the day.
I wish that I knew earlier in life that I never lacked time.
Just energy.
Have you ever gone downhill skiing?
To me, depression feels a lot like wearing ski boots.
At first, you can tell something isn’t right - your feet feel heavy, you can’t run or even walk right, the boots are annoying and painful and frustrating.
But after a while, you get used to them.
You start to learn how to walk in them, slowly and clumsily, enough so that the weight and constriction of the boots starts to feel normal.
But then, after a long, cold day, you take them off and slip into a pair of worn-in sneakers.
That’s what recovering from depression feels like.
Suddenly you remember what it’s like to walk, and it feels like flying.
You can walk, and run, and dance, and there is
nothing constantly weighing you down - there’s no obstacle you have to work around with every step you take.
Just standing around feels comfortable again.
And it seems so strange to you that you ever walked around with these big, clunky, heavy, inflexible things strapped to your feet, weighing you down, slowing you down, hurting you, and thinking it was normal.
My wife suffers from depression but I don't.
From the many conversations we've had about it, I think the best way I can illustrate the difference is this.
When I am down and life has got on top of me, I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
I know the feeling will pass or I know I can take action to make myself feel better.
My wife on the other hand, will feel like there is no way out.
It is out of her control, so she is left with a feeling helplessness and a genuine fear that it could go on for ever.
In essence she is left with a self-perpetuating cycle of depression, fear and helplessness, each making the other worse.
To be motivated for work, love, life etc...
For mentally well people, in the presence of anxiety-inducing and dread-inducing events, you feel anxiety and dread.
In the presence of things, people or events that are positive you feel happiness and joy.
In the presence of neither, you just feel neither especially happy nor especially sad.
In all situations you tend to be able to go on functioning, like eating, sleeping, washing and working.
Events that induce anxiety and dread are dangerous, serious or major life events, not every day inconveniences which might make a mentally unwell person feel anxiety or dread.
During rough times, a mentally well person can draw on some degree of
'resilience' or 'positivity' or 'energy' or whatever you want to call it.
A mentally unwell person feels vulnerable and adrift and unable to cope.
Not being depressed is NOT feeling good and energised all the time.
It's your thoughts and feelings being proportional to their causes, being able to function normally despite the bad ones and enjoying the good ones.
As a mentally well person I have had no events in my adult life which cause me to feel hopeless, useless or unable to cope.
I have once suffered anxiety and it was in response to uncertainty
about one of the things generally considered a top 3 major life event.
Otherwise things either make me feel anything from profoundly sad to profoundly joyful, but they don't alter my perception of my value or ability to go on with a fulfilling life positively or negatively.
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Edit: Thanks for the awards.
If you're mentally well and feeling like beep right now, keep going, things will get better and you'll feel better.
"Come what come may, time and the hour runs through the roughest day."
Bit of Shakespeare for you there.
If you're mentally unwell, I hope you have access to the medical help you need, therapeutic and pharmaceutical.
We live in a wonderful age where the chemical imbalance in your brain which isn't your fault can be treated, try to have faith in medical science!
If you're not sure whether you feel bad because times are hard or because you might be ill, don't be afraid to seek help.
The first step is talking to someone you trust about it, a professional or a friend.
It might turn out that you just needed to talk and that you're well, or that you're becoming ill and you catch it early, either way that's a good outcome.
When you take your finger from the button it is no longer depressed.
I'm surprised no one else has said it, but I can tell you what the opposite of depressed is like.
Mania.
Having a manic episode, especially when I was undiagnosed, was like the biggest high.
You feel elevated, happy, energetic, motivated, and more.
You might even feel an unusual sense of superiority to others and have visions of grandeur.
You feel on top of the world.
You feel limitless like you couldn't make a mistake if you tried.
But mistake you can and will.
You act impulsively.
You think
you're so clever and untouchable.
You rack up debt and maybe are rude to your friends.
You make risky judgement calls with your employers for completely unnecessary and selfish reasons.
You make irreversible decisions you might forever regret.
You fall down, and down, and down into the worst depression hole you've ever dug yourself in and it's all your own fault.
You went from your personal savings being positive $20K to negative $30K.
You lose your mind.
Your girlfriend breaks up with you and now you've got to work twice as hard to fix what you hope you can.
After a few years of the depression hole and you catch a life changing break.
You come into an unexpected six-figure Inheritance.
It immediately spikes your mania like never before.
Fast forward three and a half years and not only is it all gone, but so is all the money you've earned during that time, you are $30K in the hole AGAIN, you somehow didn't manage to buy a house or any property during that time, and it is all your fault once AGAIN.
You hate yourself, your wife hates you, and your folks back home will never understand how or why you squandered what should have been a grand-slam of a start into your 30s.
But don't worry.
I'm sure I'll be manic soon and the world will be right AGAIN.
edit: If you relate to this post, please speak with your physician or family doctor.
Seek help, support, and treatment.
You are not alone and you can turn it around.
I've not had an episode in some years now and have been financially stable enough that we're in the process of buying our first house.
Something I truly do not think would be possible if it weren't for my doctors (and
the treatment they recommended) and my wife.
Pretty great.
Imagine just waking up and thinking "Hey, I think it's gonna be a good day," and just immediately enjoying your life and being focused on the day at hand.
No lingering anxieties.
No thoughts of dread.
Plenty of energy, and the motivation to get some beep done.
Basically imagine how you feel after a small bong rip and a cup of coffee, but you didn't need either.
It's like having a fire blazing & actually feeling the warm glow while enjoying a cup of hot chocolate.
I would probably say it’s being able to healthily cope and handle your emotions when things go wrong.
You don’t immediately think of the worst outcome and you’re able to stay positive.
You think of your future and are excited of what’s to come.
It is beep great.
It is the feeling that anything is possible, that every day is worth living, that you're just completely content and happy.
It is sitting on the couch with your SO, watching some lame tv show, and not wanting to be anywhere else.
It is taking a walk outside in the sunshine, sun on your face, not having a care in the world.
It is like your heart swelled up three sizes.
Edit: just thought of one more: It is waking up and wanting to get out of bed.
Not because you have to, but because you know it's gonna be another good day.
A myth, a legend.
At least for me...
Depression is not instant suicide thoughts.
Yes, some depressed people are suicidal, but it's not always that.
When something goes wrong, my initial thought is “that sucks, next time will be better” because I know that good things can come even if this moment sucks because good things did come for me in the past
I’ve been depressed before.
I guess the difference between then and now is that I have hope and belief that things change so why can’t they change for the better?
If you’re depressed though, I hope that things would start looking up for you too
I wouldn't know 🙁
I need upvotes!
!
May your day be filled with joy and happiness.
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