I just wanna lose a few pounds so I can fit into my old pants from 2nd grade.
Shut up!
What's wrong with this? ( Ow! )
And this? ( Oh- oh my god )
Still haven't figured it out yet?
Well I'll tell you what's wrong..
They're all fat.
Hi. I'm Randy "Muscle Face" Rogers.
So many people are fat now, and that's gross!
Gross!
There's millions of diets out there, but how come everyone's still fat?
How come you're still so fat, huh? How come you're still such a fatty mcfatterson?
The problem isn't the diet, it's you!
Which is why I've created my new, revolutionary workout program..
The key to Get Off Your Ass and Do Something is simple:
All you have to do is get off your ass,
Come to my state-of-the-art dojo and you do something.
What do you do? I don't fricking care!
At my dojo, you can do such things as:
I did it.
You're fat! I know. -Cryingg-
Wow, that felt pretty good.
I'm a virgin.
Hell, you could like pet a duck. I don't f--king care what you do! Just do something!
Too many people spend all their life, sitting on their asses playing video games.
But what if you could just get off your ass and do all that crap in real life!
Instead of jumping on mushrooms in Mario, you can do it in real life!
-Mario(?) sounds-
Instead of arranging shapes in a stupid video game, you could do it in real life!
-Yelling-
It's too friggin' hard!
Instead of using weapons in a video game, you can use them in real life!
-Gunshots and screaming-
Oh god, okay.
Maybe not that one.
Okay, someone get an ambulance Jesus!
I did it.
I know my program will work for you cause I used to be a fat f--k like this guy.
Hey I'm not fa--
But then I started getting off my ass and doing things and I lost 400 lbs!
This is what I looked like before I got off my ass.
Ugh, gross!
Makes me wanna go back in time and murder my fatass self.
But if you don't believe my program will work for you, just listen to this happy customer.
I'm kinda on the fence.
So there's proof my program will change your life.
So get off your ass and do something!
But what if I don't wanna?
Hi-yah!
Join now!
-Anthony reading the screen-
Ok, now dust my trophy collection.
Hey Randy!
Quit playing with your fat friend's dicks and take out the trash!
Get out of my room, mom!
Don't make me slap the s--t out of your ass again.
Take out the trash you little bitch.
Uh.. ok guys now get off your ass and take out the trash.
To see bloopers and other cool stuff, click the video right here!
I have a beaver.
Now get off your ass and subscribe!