this is awesome it's super nice do you like it i love it do you want to see the kitchen
it's huge it is huge the other thing that we're really excited about here is like over here you're
gonna have your alarm system definitely gonna need that worst case scenario you can run in and you'll
be able to just like push button and the cops will be here that way when your girls come home you
don't have to worry about anything does that help you feel safe yeah good that's what this is about
this house is perfect for hannah and her girls they're going to be safe here and it's definitely
a house that she can have a fresh start thanks you guys so much for everything this is amazing
this is perfect the kingston's think they have so much power well hannah escaped polygamy she's
free her and her girls are free that is empowering are you ready to start i'm ready start unloading
i'm lucky my girls are lucky to have all these amazing people helping us through this but i'm
nervous about what's gonna happen for my future do you like these should i put it in the fridge yeah
are you okay he's texting me you're asking where i'm at your husband is
yeah i don't know what's he saying where are you at when you're coming back
i'm scared scary's gonna come looking for me
did you tell anybody that we found this house for you i told a few people
they're not just gonna give up they will harass you and your family for months
so we we probably should get out of here let's keep let's keep you and your girls safe hannah's
husband is looking to find her and probably bring her back before she's gone emotionally
out enough to say no to him i'm nervous for what's going to happen when we're not here
so just right here yep wow that's a lot of trees i know i love it
i'm excited to see this house are you um that looks interesting i'm hoping that once she sees
what she could have she will make the decision to finally leave and be out for good oh i like
that i do too and you could be in here this is the master bedroom it's a nice-sized shower
cool if you lived here you would actually have a master bathroom you could use
don't you think this house looks so much better and
feels so much better than yours how would you feel living in a place like this i don't know
i'm not sure how i feel in my mind's eye i was imagining having a vaulted ceilings
i just i don't know i think there's a lot of space it's definitely bigger than the place you're in
now i feel like i like the open area space like i need living area how is this not open living area
i don't know maybe i maybe i want more square footage i think you're just coming up with excuses
seriously you're so brainwashed this is a hundred times better than the place you're in now
i think the kids would be so much happier i'm offering to help her her family outside of
the order is offering to help her and it's still not good enough i don't know what else we can do
well it's something to consider but not today i just don't think i could do it right now
i feel like that i still have a lot of responsibilities that i have to wrap up
and before you could move into a different house just before i could even make any
really big life-changing decisions and a move is a life-changing decision i'm not ready to do that
it just feels too overwhelming and i'm not ready to do that it's really devastating to know that
my siblings still have to live that life and that my mom is still living that life
it's drilled so hard into your head that that's god's work that's where you're supposed to be
and that if you leave you would have been better off never to have been born
um it's gonna take time so anyway she probably in her mind's eye is thinking mom you're a nut
and my personal opinion is i feel like she hasn't learned forgiveness the kingston's
do provide a home for you they provide a job for you if you hold on to all those
hurts and those pains you don't hurt them you're hurting yourself by hanging on to
that
hey cammy yeah hey i am just getting together uh invitation to that i'm making for mom and the
kids so i'm calling my sister kami to see if she can deliver my wedding invitation to my mom and
siblings i can't just take my wedding invitation to my mom's house because my dad could be there
my dad had someone else in line to marry me when he found out that i liked eric then he hated eric
and we haven't talked since what do you think mom is going to think about it because it's
just going to say mom and the kids that's not going to have dad's name on it at all
i'll come over there and we can talk about it yeah that sounds good let's do that
hey bye i feel like right now cami has a better relationship
with my mom and she's warmed up to the fact that kemi left the kingston group and i've
just left i'm kind of scared that my dad might find this invitation somewhere and
be upset about it and not let my mom go or my brothers and sisters go because i'm a bad example
but i would love to have my mom and brothers and sisters there to just see
that life on the outside is not what they've been taught hey how are you good how are you good i was
just about to make some dinner did you eat no should i help you sure all right have you been
good i have this where do you want me to put it oh the invitation yeah so it says mom and kids
so if you could just slip it to mom yeah i'll have to i'll text her and see what
she thinks i have left the church but i've still managed to be able to kind of keep a connection
with my family so that i can see my mom and my siblings i got married when i was 18 years old and
we had agreed when we were engaged that we would be in the church but we did not have to live the
polygamous lifestyle but he dropped the bomb on me saying that he wanted to take on another sister
wife and i i said no and he packed up all my stuff and kicked me out i thought i was going to hell
and i was so devastated but he just wanted more than one woman and
he tried to use god to justify it are you sure about not inviting dad
what about the father-daughter dance i don't think i'll even have a father-daughter dance
because it's like i didn't really have a father i didn't really even know he was my dad till i was
about eight years old i remember he was buckling me into the back of the car and i said okay thanks
daddy and he said i'm not your dad and so i was wondering who's this guy then that's coming around
i don't understand i found out later because my mom was upset that her kids couldn't call him
dad and the first wife's kids could and it's because my mom wasn't legally married to him
and they didn't want people knowing that he was a polygamist so we just called him burl
what about walking down the aisle i just feel like it's kind of
a prize and an accomplishment too for him to walk me down he doesn't really deserve that privilege
you know he just hasn't talked to me since everything with leaving the order and everything
i haven't heard from ethan in a couple days i'm worried that he's probably out here
doing drugs or just out on the streets doing something
his mom's worried about him shannon we're all worried about him and so i'm driving around
in crack town salt lake city where everyone hangs out
i'm very uncomfortable but i'm willing to to look around here because i know
somebody has to do it somebody has to find ethan and call him out on what he's doing oh my gosh
there he is i knew it
hey what are you doing where you been
nowhere really hanging out at home what have you been up to
be real with me what have you been up to what's going on you exist
i am pissed wait why are you pissed whitey balls dude i want to know what you've really
been doing when is last time you smoked today today i smoked sweet today yeah so
you just been out smoking after everything we did everything we talked about uh it's not mi truly
so what do you want to do i don't know what what are you doing here
what's your plan what do you want to do if you like yeah ethan what do you want to do
here like don't even take this period i am i just don't know this is your life
ethan at the end of the day i go home i have a nice bed this is where you're at
seeing ethan out here with these boys i'm just like you know what it's just we lost boys have a
good night when people leave polygamy they don't leave with an education or a background in how
to get a job or anything they're just they're on their own and so a lot of times people will turn
to drugs and that's what's so sad about ethan is that's what he did and it's not fair it's
not fair that that's the life that he was dealt but it is and so i got to help him out of it
today we're getting married right now i'm feeling really nervous let's say my mom and my my brothers
and sisters show up my dad comes in there during the ceremony and has them leave which i feel like
it's very possible there are going to be people people in the order i know and i have no idea
who's going to even show up this is going to be intense we're really excited for amanda but at
the same time anybody could be here there's just so much drama that can go down tonight personally
i'm nervous there are going to be some people here that i have not seen in you know 10 years
so we've invited security to be here it's ready are you ready
asking me you need to get ready i'm not ready and she's not ready just kidding we are but we
need to get dressed just get your dress on but i wanted to tell you that that's here
right now yeah we're serious so yeah i can't believe that's at my wedding
did you think that he would he wouldn't show up he told me i wasn't welcome around at all so
okay did you hear us laugh yeah that's him he's laughing
you gonna go say hi to him are you gonna go say hi to girls
well okay
i know i saw that we did okay i know she didn't want him here so we'll see how
it goes we weren't sure if he was going to be here but the fact that amanda's dad's here now
we're on the lookout so we're definitely we're on high alert how did it well how did
it feel with your parents showing up oh were you surprised yeah it was really surprising actually
well i guess you could just hope for the best at this point what part of the wedding is he
going to be any part of it have you brought him to sit with the family or what are you decided
about sit down and watch me walk down with someone else good luck thank you i'm so excited for you
do you eric take amanda to be your lawfully wedded wife yes i do do you amanda
take eric to be your lawfully wedded husband i now pronounce you man and wife you may kiss the bride
thank you
amanda's dad is chanelle's ex-father-in-law and that was a really hard marriage for chanel
um just so you know he's over there on the right oh thank you for telling me you're
welcome
man i started to notice the bad parts in my marriage after a couple of months the
physical violence escalated and it started out by just grabbing my arms and throwing me into
the wall and after he did that he choked me until i blacked out his dad come up to me and
shook my hand and said it was nice to see me and i wasn't okay with him just pretending that
he didn't do anything pretending that we're good would you be willing to talk to me for a minute
i want you to acknowledge acknowledge what you're sending to me and acknowledge whether
you claim to remember or not well i think that the very best thing is just to move on
do you think you think it's that easy to move on when i'm hurt every single night by someone who's
supposed to be my husband supposed to love me and be the one that takes care of me and protects me
you think i can just move on from that i hope so i want you to at least see
that clearly it was big enough that years later i still have a hard time with it i
still have issues with it i know i could have done a lot better i'm so proud of you
i feel really and i feel better my hope for my future is that it continues
that i have my family and friends in my life all right let's put those crowns back in the box that
little by little the ones that are still in the group that they start
leaving that behind and they come and join us in this world
and i want to help other people realize that they can go that they can have a better life
and that they can leave the polygamous group and they can still be a good person and still
go to heaven and they are not going to be punished for leaving the abuse and the pain
one two three and learn and experience what happiness is
and experience what love is so cool look at that
that's so cool and that i can help them experience that and experience it with them
you