♪ It's much better to face these kinds of things ♪
♪ with a sense of poise and rationality ♪
- Did you throw a floss in just now?
- I can't keep going. - That was incredible.
Anyone feel like pretending
they're 14 and sobbing in a 7/11?
We're doing Panic! at the Disco today.
♪ Had to have high, high... ♪
Wait, do we know how the game works?
I forgot to tell you.
- No.
- Great, cool, just started singing in your faces,
how did that feel?
"Had to have high, high hopes for a living, shooting for"
- What you did for a living.
(siren blaring)
- For "what you did for a living,"
and just one take without an emergency!
Okay, we're gonna pause for a
Panic! at the Disco trivia question:
- Okay.
- Which Panic! at the Disco song was my friend
Kate's ringback tone our junior year of high school?
- Sounds like Panda! at the Disco!
- Panda! at the Disco, amazing.
I feel one thousand years old right now.
♪ Didn't know how, but I always had a feeling I was gonna... ♪
♪ - "I was gonna" wake up, my head started spinning... ♪
♪ Then I went back to sleep, and then I woke up grinning ♪
- We're gonna copyright these, we're gonna
release them as a remix. - Okay!
- "I was gonna..."
- Give up on life?
- "I was gonna give up on life."
- Is that the lyric?
- It's not.
"I was gonna..."
♪ - Be a one in a million, always had high, high hopes. ♪
- Oh my God, not only do you know the words,
you're performing them, and that's, like,
more than we could possibly ask for, it's incredible.
Any sinners up in here, any Beebo-heads?
Just wanna talk about Panic! at the Disco with anyone.
Anyone?
You're wearing eyeliner!
So I'm gonna try to, like, get more in the look,
cause I look not that much like,
so I'm just gonna put my bangs in my face.
- Yes.
- This is their, like, first big song,
"I Write Sins Not Tragedies," do we remember this?
Of course you don't, you were literally in utero, okay.
♪ What a beautiful wedding... ♪
Ooh, that was so bad.
"'What a beautiful wedding!
What a beautiful wedding,' says..."
- The man, I don't know!
- "The man," this is a wedding
approved by "the man," congratulations.
"Says a..."
- "Bridesmaid to..." a sister?
- "To a waiter," but that waiter could be your sister,
your sister might be working at the wedding.
- Don't talk to the wait staff at a wedding,
they're working.
♪ "What a beautiful wedding!" says a... ♪
♪ - bridesmaid to the waiter ♪
- You are the first one to get it!
- Yes!!!
- You're moving too much!
- I'm trying!
- You've gotta smudge it a bit,
you've got to, like, rub your eyes like you were crying.
- Okay, I have to rub my eyes like I was
crying? - Like you were crying.
- Do you work at MAC? What's happening?
- She's a makeup artist or whatever.
- Wait, she's the makeup artist?
♪ I chime in with a "Haven't you people ever hear of ♪
♪ Closing a goddamn door?!" No, ♪
- No, no way?
- Oh, no way.
We're not leaving the doors open to this wedding,
this is a private function!
♪ Much better to face these kinds of things ♪
♪ With a sense of poise and rationality! ♪
Yes! She does makeup, she does lyrics, she has aviators.
- That was actually one of my Instagram captions,
about, like, three weeks ago, so...
- You're cooler than me and I feel threatened.
Guys, one time in 2006 I wore jeans
so tight I literally passed out.
Does anyone wanna talk to me about Panic! at the Disco?
♪ I pray for the wicked on the weekend, Mama... ♪
♪ - Mama, say a prayer for me, too ♪
- Yeah!
- That was better than what it is.
"Mama, can I..."
- Call you?
- "Mama, can I call you?"
I'm praying for people and it's not working.
"Mama, can I..."
- Go outside.
- "Mom, can I go outside?" I've been inside for a long time.
♪ Mama... ♪
- "Can I get another amen?"
- Oh my God!
That's so impre... you lied to me earlier,
you said you knew "I Write Sins Not Tragedies,"
this is newer.
Okay, you are cool and also a liar
and that makes you... you're gonna be a star.
All of their fans call the lead singer, Brandon, Beebo.
- Beebo, okay.
- So my name's Jake, just, like, if you were a fan
of mine, what would the nickname for me be?
- J-Glow.
- That's good cause I also feel
like it could be, like, a fragrance.
- Oh, I smell it.
- "Oh, it's..."
(whistling in background)
Okay...
"Oh, it's Saturday night, I swear to God, I..."
- I'm not at the club?
- I swear to God, I know it sounds like I'm at the club,
I know you can hear Ja Rule playing in the background,
but I am not at the club...
"Yeah, swear to God..."
- I'm going to church on Sunday...
- Yeah, I swear to God, God I swear to you,
I am going to church on Sunday,
I will see you there, don't be late.
What are you guys usually doing on a Saturday night?
- Netflix.
- Swear to God, I'm gonna Netflix,
I'm gonna Netflix so hard...
Thanks for watching this episode of Finish the Hit!
I guess what we learned today is that
"I Write Sins Not Tragedies" is a timeless song.
I am not timeless; I am apparently
the oldest person in Times Square, with the worst makeup.
(bouncy music)