- Welcome fruit lovers!
I'm Pear, and-
- Cut, cut.
Let's try that again, this time with more emotion.
- More emotion?
Dude, I'm just introducing the video.
- Oh, wait, I misread that.
Not more emotion, more explosions.
(laughing)
Back to one.
- Ugh.
Anyway, I'm Pear, and this is Orange on a power trip.
- We're showing you how to direct a movie.
Watch and learn, people!
- As you can see, somebody thought it'd be a good idea
to give Orange a bullhorn and let him direct this episode.
- Release the doves, release the crew for lunch,
release your bowels.
(laughing)
Okay, back to one.
- Ugh, anyway, here goes nothing.
Step one, go through the script with a director's eye.
- This is total garbage!
Needs a complete rewrite.
- Um, dude, that is garbage.
The script is over here.
- Oh.
Hey, I just had a brilliant idea for the new ending.
Single tear will roll down our lead actor's cheek.
- Wow, well that's an improvement over
the usual TNT explosion ending.
- Yeah, Pear, this is serious art we're doing here.
Back to one!
- Do you even know what "back to one" means?
You sure are saying it a lot.
- You think this is easy, Pear?
I'm wearing a turtleneck, and I don't even have a neck.
(laughing)
- Uh, the next step a director should take
is to plan out your shots.
- Okay, so we'll have a crane shot,
followed by a crane shot, followed by a crane shot,
followed by-
- Lemme guess, another crane shot.
- (scoffs) please.
Shot number four is a slime shot.
- What the heck is a- (screaming)
- Perfect!
Moving onto shot number five, another crane shot!
(laughing)
- Ugh, okay.
Step three is to get the most out of your actors.
- (Orange) Um, Pear, I'm sorry to inform you,
but you've been recast.
We're bringing in someone else to play the role of Pear.
- What?
Who could play Pear better than me?
- Daniel Day-Lewis.
- Okay, that's fair.
- Are you just copying what I say?
- Indeed, it's how I learn your ways.
- Ugh.
- Stop it.
- Orange.
- Ah.
- Orange, I'm worried this character might be too boring.
Mind if I spice him up a little bit?
I'm thinking something along the lines of,
"Hello, fruit lovers!
I'm Pear, and welcome to how to."
- Wow, that was perfect.
Brilliant! (audience cheering)
That's a wrap, cut.
Back to one.
Let's get loud.
- Uh, not so fast, Orange.
There's still step four.
Once filming is complete, the director still needs
to oversee the editing process.
- Ah, do I have to?
I really just liked yelling at people with a bullhorn.
- Orange, you have to keep an eye on the editors.
They're a weird bunch.
If you don't watch them like a hawk, who knows
what kinda crazy things they might slip in?
- Like what?
- [Pear] Well, you're blue now, for one thing,
but seems like that might be the least of your worries.
- Ah, oh no, I lost control.
I've failed as a director.
Pear, how do I get things back on track?
- Just make sure the video ends the way you planned.
The single tear, remember?
- That's right, the single tear.
Editor, fix my mistakes, we've (indistinct)
Make him sadder, sadder I say!
Ah, can't you fix this?
I'm telling you, we need more emotion.
Oh wait, I misread that, I need more explosion.
- Hey, I could do that.
No sweat, boss.
(explosion) (laughing) - Nooo!
(upbeat music)