Hello, Trevor.
Oh, hello, Ellen.
Hello, everybody.
Thanks for having me back.
[APPLAUSE]
You're a funny man.
And I saw you at the Grammys.
We were both nominated for--
We were both nominated for a Grammy.
We were both Grammy nominees for comedy album.
And then Grammy losers, yeah.
I don't like to think of it as losers.
I think everybody was a nominee.
And then one person is going to win the award.
And that person was Dave Chappelle.
I mean, you know, Dave Chappelle winning the comedy,
I'm not offended by that.
No, I'm not, either.
But he wasn't there to get the award.
Which, I think, we were both in our seats.
We were.
And I saw him backstage.
He showed up after the--
Yes.
He got there late.
And I said, you don't deserve it.
Yeah.
I agree.
Because he was at the bar.
Yeah.
And then he missed the award.
And I was like, that should be a rule.
Whoever gets to the award first should get it.
Yes.
And then it would have been me and you.
Yes, we both would have won.
Yeah, anyway, congratulations for your nomination.
Thank you so much.
Congratulations for yours.
You're a funny man.
I learned this today, which, I need to talk to you about.
First of all, do you play tennis?
I do now.
OK, this is the craziest thing.
You've played with Rafael Nadal.
Yes, Rafael Nadal, Roger Federer, and Bill Gates,
in the biggest tennis match that's ever been attended,
the largest tennis match of all time, 52,000 people.
Where was this?
In Cape Town, South Africa.
OK.
How did this-- just because you're a big celebrity there?
How did you get into that?
This was really strange.
So I don't know how this happened.
But I think I've become friends with Bill Gates.
And I say that--
I've just met him many times.
And we have conversations.
And then one day, he phoned.
And he was like, hey, do you want to play tennis with me?
And I was like, yes.
And he was like, in Cape Town.
I was like, well, that's a long way
to go to play tennis, but yes.
And then he said, with Roger Federer.
And I was like this, is a very strange request.
And it turns out, Roger Federer has
this foundation that raises money
to improve education in and around Africa
and all over the world, really.
And they wanted me to play tennis with them.
And I was like, I'm in, I'm in.
I didn't know how to play tennis, though.
But I didn't want to tell them this.
Because when cool people invite you to things,
you're just like, yeah, yeah, I'm in.
And so I was like, I'm in.
And then they were like, do you know to play tennis?
I was like, yeah.
You do the, you know, the thing.
Ah.
And then, two months before the event, Roger's people called.
And they're like, hey, can we see
a video of you playing tennis?
And so I called my friend.
And I said, hey, let's go play some tennis.
And we'll video this and send it to them.
And then we got there.
And I could not-- people think tennis is easy.
I could not hit the ball to where
I was trying to hit the ball.
I could hit the ball, but not in the direction
that I was trying to get it to go.
And then I panicked.
And then I was just like, I'm screwed.
And then I got a coach.
And then I told him my phone doesn't work,
it can't send videos right now.
So I got a tennis coach.
And then in two months, I had to learn tennis
from scratch, one of the craziest things I've ever
done in my life.
So you played every single day, learning?
Every single day, two and a half to three hours,
every single day, just learning how to play tennis.
You see me at the back, that's two months of me learning,
this here, panicking right now.
I'm just like--
I'm the person who's panicking.
There, that's me.
Oh, look at that!
You've got it!
Yeah, that's me.
[APPLAUSE]
You did it!
Panic.
And so it was wild was-- this was crazy.
So I get the tennis coach.
But now, there's confusion.
Because the Roger Federer people phoned the tennis coach.
And they go, hey, this guy needs a coach.
And the tennis coaching place is like,
what does he need a coach for?
They're like, oh, he's playing tennis against Roger Federer.
So they think I'm a professional.
So they go, oh, we've got the right person.
This guy trains professionals.
I need to be taught like a child.
I don't know how to play the game.
So I get there.
And he's like-- he's from Eastern Europe.
So he's very-- he's like, OK, you ready to play some tennis?
And I'm like, yeah, let's do it.
He's like, OK, how much have you played before?
I was like, nothing.
He's like, hehe, funny guy.
OK.
He's like, let's hit ball.
And then he hits it to me.
And then I do my thing.
And then the ball goes.
He's like, oh, you haven't played in a while?
I was like, if "a while" is life, then yes, a while.
[LAUGHTER]
So he says to me, OK, hit again, hit again.
And after like five or six, he looks at me.
He's like, how much you play tennis?
I've never played.
He's like, but you're playing Roger Federer in two months.
Then I'm like, yeah.
He's like, oh, this-- this is big problem for you.
So now he doesn't really know how to coach me.
And so what he does is-- this the most amazing thing.
He hits the ball to me.
And he doesn't know how to teach me because I'm just useless.
And so he just keeps going-- he's like, Trevor,
he's like, OK just brush the ball.
The ball comes.
Then I hit, it does nothing.
He's like, no, brush the ball.
So I'm trying.
He's like, no, brush the ball.
But he doesn't change his instruction.
He just keeps saying it.
He's like, brush.
OK, now, brush it!
Brush it!
No, brush it.
No, brush.
Brush the ball.
No, you didn't brush it!
You've got to brush it!
What did I say?
I'm like, brush it.
He's like, brush it!
When it comes, don't hit.
Try to brush, try to brush the ball.
I'm trying my ass off.
I'm trying to brush this ball.
It's not going anywhere.
Brush, brush, brush, brush, brush, brush, brush,
like a week and a half of brushing.
The ball does not go to the other side of the net.
I'm panicking.
I'm like, I'm going to look like an idiot in front
of 52,000 people and streamed around the world.
Then I move to another place where
I've got to get another coach.
Because I'm coaching in every city,
where I'm doing comedy, where I'm touring.
And then I get another coach.
And her name is Nedda.
And she's also from Eastern Europe.
And this is hilarious.
So she goes--
I meet on day one.
She's like, so, your people tell me you need coach.
I'm like, yes.
She's like, do you play tennis?
I'm like, uh, a little bit.
She's like, hit ball for me.
I hit.
She's like, you don't play tennis.
Let's start again.
And so we'd like practice for about an hour.
And then finally, she's like, we're getting there,
we're getting there, we're getting there.
And then she comes to me.
And she's like, you're not bad, you know what your problem is?
I'm like, what?
She's like, you brush the ball too much.
You need to hit the ball.
[LAUGHTER]
Hit the ball.
So that was my journey.
[APPLAUSE]
I can play now.
I can play.
We'll be right back.