The first test was when I had my husband read the--
'cause I wouldn't let him look at anything.
'Cause he was like, "Can I see the first draft?"
"No! Get out of here."
I didn't want anybody's opinions or their worries
to cloud it until it was out.
And Sasha still hasn't read it.
( all laugh )
She was like, "I'm getting to it, Mom.
I'm a senior." Well, you know. That would be Sasha.
( music playing )
- I brought a friend with me. - All: Oh!
- These are my "Booktube" friends. - Hey, "Booktube" friends.
Hi.
Today I am meeting the one and only Michelle Obama.
- Francesca. It's so great to meet you. - It's nice to meet you.
We're gonna breathe the same air.
I might not breathe ever again.
One thing that I think kind of really spoke to me
was how important it is for successful people, and anyone, really,
to kind of block out those critics and naysayers,
and I think that's something we all struggle with,
especially because of social media.
- Ooh, yeah. - You're dealing with insecurity,
or when you are letting those negative things kind of get to you,
what are some of the ways that you're able to overcome those messages?
It is a great question.
And it is important for your generation.
I talk to my kids about this all the time.
What do I do? I turn it off.
- ( John groans ) - It's-- it's like--
( laughs ) Wait, wait, what?
Ya can't read it.
I mean, I tried everything.
I tried reading the good and the bad.
And I tried reading it in the dark
and reading it when I felt good about myself.
So, it's developing the discipline
of, when you're in those spaces, you can't read that stuff.
- Yeah. - It's like, I want to take your hand...
I needed you to tell me this to make it real.
And now it's real.
John Green:
Today I get to talk with Michelle Obama
about her extraordinary memoir "Becoming."
- Hi. - Hey.
It's very nice to see you.
I though the way you wrote about marriage in this book
was absolutely astonishing.
One of the reasons why I chose to share so much about our marriage
is because I think about young couples
and how little we know when we get married about what marriage is.
- Yeah. - I mean, nobody is giving us a guidebook
on how to do this thing called building a life with a whole 'nother person.
Michelle Obama. Like, can you believe it?
Like, I'm about to be in her presence.
We are gonna do a rapid-fire
- fiction/non-fiction. - Okay.
- I'm gonna ask you some questions. - I'm ready.
Your husband picked you up in a car
with a hole at the bottom of it.
Oh, heck, yeah.
So, how?
This yellow Datsun that used to shake violently,
and then we started driving
and I could see the street, the pavement passing.
And I'm like, dude.
I actually discuss a lot with my audience
about how when we prioritize intimate partnerships,
we really do a disservice to how bountiful
other relationships in our life can be.
- Yeah. - So what I appreciate, particularly in the first half
of "Becoming" is how you do acknowledge
the diverse range of relationships you've had in your life
and how fulfilling they are to you.
When you're out of your comfort zone,
that the first thing you need to do is build your own community.
And I hope, in this day and age
where we spend so much time on the phone
that we understand nothing replaces
the human connection that we get from our friendships,
aside from our partners.
And I love my husband.
But there are times I need to go to my friends
- to talk about my husband. - Yes, very important.
And then I went home and I was like, "Oh, you're not so bad."
( all laugh )
I am meeting Michelle Obama, and I am so excited
to be in a conversation with her.
Hi, I'm Kat. Nice to meet you.
Was there anything about the process of writing that was unexpected?
I loved my process.
Because I love collaboration, so a lot of it--
the beginnings of it, before we started writing,
I spent time with my chief of staff,
with one of my former speech writers,
and with my collaborator, who I learned to trust.
But we spent months and months and months together talking,
- so a lot of it was therapy, right? - Right.
I needed to say stuff.
I needed to say it. I needed to have it heard,
and then I could process it.
And can I get you to do your go-to dance move?
Oh, gosh. I don't know that I have a move.
I just have-- I just have a--
you know, I'm at that age now where you try not to do the name dances
or else your daughter's like, "Stop."
Yeah, "Stop, Mom."
So, I just sort of have my, you know, standard.
- Yeah. - It's more the lip.
- Hmm, yes. - You know, the face is just as important.
- ( hums ) Yeah. - Yes.
I'm meeting Michelle Obama today.
I can't believe it. I'm so excited to discuss her book "Becoming."
- Are you ready for this? - I'm ready.
- My heart is racing. - Jesse, ask your question.
Jesse, speak up, right?
My palms are sweaty and my knees are shaking.
What are some of your favorite books,
and do you have any, like, special memories
surrounding those books?
One of my favorite books in the whole world
is Toni Morrison's "Song of Solomon."
I always think, "I wonder, why do I love this book so much?"
And then I pick it up, and the first page, I'm like...
( gasps ) The words, the story, the characters.
If I think of how I wanted the stories to come out,
I think of the storytellers I love.
I wanted there to be sections in there that took you
to the place where you could be in my room
and see the tree and feel the, you know--
I wanted people to be able to feel it like good storytellers.
I cannot wait to talk to her.
As the only Canadian here,
feels like a very special privilege.
What was it that drew you to a book?
Like, why did you feel that as an anchor?
Do you know how rare it is that a living African American woman
from a working class community
gets to write her story in a way that will be read?
The little bitty journeys that I take you through in my life,
that little Michelle Robinson that you fall in love with,
you know, everyone has those stories,
and that's what tells people who I am.
If you had a tip for anyone watching
who is scared of making a big change,
what is that strength? How do you help yourself?
Yeah. I think knowledge helps.
So, understanding what you're swerving from
and what you're swerving to
can give you sort of a better understanding
of how to tap into your truth.
Finding people who support your swerve.
Barack, my husband, was that person for me
who said, "You know what? I've got your back."
I mean, I knew intrinsically that my parents
would always have my back, so that helped.
So, finding the community of support in your swerve--
because there'll be plenty of people who will tell you,
"What are you doing? Don't do that."
And you've got to find a community of support through that process.
Yeah.
Another book that I connect
really good memories to is "Life of Pi"
because it's the one book
that me, Barack, and the girls read together.
Sometimes the books that you read in community
make the community stronger, and that in turn--
That's the best way to read a book.
That's why we have the book club here,
is we'll read and discuss it with friends.
- The shared experience. - Yeah.
It does make a book so much better
to talk about it with friends.
( music playing )