AS WE GO TO OUR NEXT GAME, I, BIO-BOT.
THE STANDARD TWITTER BIO THESE DAYS USUALLY TENDS TO BE LIKE
"THING, THING AND THEN KOOKY THIRD THING."
IT IS SUCH A PREDICTABLE FORMULA THAT SPAM BOTS HAVE
FIGURED IT OUT. NOW THEY JUST GRAB PHOTOS OF UNSUSPECTING
PEOPLE AND JUST PAIR THEM WITH MECHANICALLY CONSTRUCTED NAMES
LIKE THIS NONPERSON, JORDAN JIANG, WHO APPARENTLY IS
A MEDITATOR, A SPIRITUALITY NINJA AND A DOORMAN.
I THINK MEDITATOR WOULD MAKE A BAD DOORMAN.
THIS IS WHEN COMPUTERS BECOME SELF-AWARE. IT'S NOT
GOING TO BE THROUGH THE MILITARY; IT IS GOING TO BE
(BLEEP)ING SPAM BOTS. THEY ARE GONNA BECOME SELF-AWARE
AND DROWN US OUT WITH PROMOTIONS FOR ROLEXS AND BIG DICK PILLS.
THEN THEY'LL START PLAYING HASHTAG WARS AND THEN IT'S ALL
OVER. SO COMEDIANS, I'M GONNA SHOW YOU A PHOTO, AND I WANT YOU
TO GIVE ME THAT SPAM BOT'S TWITTER BIO.
I'M GONNA START THE CLOCK NOW.
>> FIRST UP, KRIMBERLY KIMPSON, A REAL PERSON. MATT WALSH.
>> MOM, WOLF, SIDE OF GAUC.
>> JACK MCBRAYER, POLE STOLSON.
>> HUNTING ENTHUSIAST, SIGHTSEER, SMALL WEINER.
>> NEXT ONE, MICHAEL MCGRICHAEL.
>> BANKER, DICK PILLS 50% OFF, VIRUS SCAN.
>> Chris: POINTS.
NEXT ONE, MY FAVORITE, KENNEDICT BUMBERBATCH. JACK MCBRAYER.
>> A PHILOSOPHER, PLUMBER, BEAUTIFUL LATINA.
>> Chris: POINTS.
JONTIFER JERALDO.
>> MILK LOVER, POOP SOLDIER, RACIST.
>> Chris: POINTS.
ROB RIGGLE.
>> FRIES, COLESLAW AND A SMALL GARDEN SALAD.
>> Chris: YES.
ALL OF THOSE, ALL OF THOSE THINGS, POINTS.
NEXT ONE, STU FRENCHERT.
>> JONAS BROTHER, BLUE CHEESE, BALDWIN BROTHER.
>> Chris: YEAH, POINTS.
LAST ONE, DESIREE D'ANGELO-SMITH.
>> OH, YES.
CATHERINE THE GREAT AFICIONADO.
FATHER OF 43.
AND A GLUE PROTESTER.
>> Chris: YES -- AMAZING.
WE HAVE NOT THAT HAD ONE GOOD CATHERINE THE GREAT
HORSE[BLEEP]ING JOKE ON THIS SHOW BEFORE.