LEE GARNER SENIOR I just don't know what we have to do to make these government interlopers happy.
They tell us to make a safer cigarette, and we do it. Then suddenly, that's not good enough.
LEE GARNER JUNIOR We might as well be living in Russia.
LEE GARNER SENIOR Damn straight.
COUGHING
You know this morning, I got a call from my competitors at Brown & Williamson
and they're getting sued by the federal government because of the health claims they made.
ROGER Yeah, we're aware of that, Mr. Garner.
But you have to realize that through manipulation of the mass media,
the public is under the impression that your cigarettes are linked to...
certain fatal diseases.
LEE GARNER SENIOR Manipulation of the media?
Hell, that's what I pay you for.
Our product is fine. I smoke'm myself.
LEE GARNER JUNIOR My Granddad smoked them. He died at 95 years old. He was hit by a truck.
ROGER I understand, but our hands are tied. We are no longer allowed to advertise that
"Lucky Strikes" are safe.
LEE GARNER SENIOR So what the hell are we going to do?
We already funded our own tobacco research center to put this whole rumor to rest.
ROGER And that's a very good start.
But it may not affect sales.
Don, I think maybe that's your cue.
DON Well, I... I've been thinking quite a bit about this. And uh......
DON: I mean you know I'm a "Lucky Strike" man from way back...so
PETE I might have a solution.
PETE At Sterling Cooper, we've been pioneering a burgeoning field of research.
And our analysis shows that the health risks associated with your products is not the end of the world.
PETE People get in their cars every day to go to work, and some of them die.
Cars are dangerous. There's nothing you can do about it.
You still have to get where you're going.
Cigarettes are exactly the same. So, why don't we simply say,
"So what if cigarettes are dangerous?"
You're a man. The world is dangerous.
Smoke your cigarette--
You still have to get where you're going.
LEE GARNER JUNIOR That's very interesting.
I mean, if cigarettes were dangerous, it would be interesting.
LEE GARNER SENIOR Except they aren't. Is that your slogan? "You're going to die anyway.
Die with us."?
PETE Actually, it's a fairly well established psychological principle
that society has a "Death Wish".
And if we could just tap into that, the market potential is--
LEE GARNER SENIOR What the hell are you talking about?
Are you insane? I'm not selling rifles here. I'm in the tobacco business.
We're selling America. The Indians gave it to us for shit's sake.
LEE GARNER JUNIOR Come on, Dad. Let's get out of here.
LEE GARNER JUNIOR The bright spot is, at least we know that if we have this problem,
everybody has this problem.
DON Gentlemen, before you leave, can I say something?
ROGER I don't know Don. Can you?
DON The Federal Trade Commission and "Reader's Digest" have done you a favor.
They've let you know that any ad that brings up the concept
of cigarettes and health together,
well,..
it's just gonna' make people think of cancer.
LEE GARNER SENIOR Yes, and we're grateful to them
DON But, what Lee Junior said is right.
You can't make those health claims, neither can your competitors.
LEE GARNER SENIOR So we got a lot of people not saying anything that sells cigarettes.
DON Not exactly.
This is the greatest advertising opportunity since the invention of cereal.
We have six identical companies making six identical products...
We can say anything we want.
DON How do you make your cigarettes?
LEE GARNER JUNIOR I don't know.
LEE GARNER SENIOR Shame on you.
We breed insect-repellant tobacco seeds, plant ‘em in the North Carolina sunshine
grow it, cut it, cure it, toast it...
DON There you go. There you go.
LEE GARNER JUNIOR But everybody else's tobacco is toasted.
DON No. Everybody else's tobacco is poisonous. "Lucky Strike's" is toasted.
ROGER Well gentlemen, I don't think I have to tell you what you've just witnessed here.
LEE GARNER JUNIOR I think you do.
DON Advertising is based on one thing:
Happiness
And you know what happiness is? Happiness is the smell of a new car...
It's freedom from fear. It's a billboard on the side of the road
that screams with reassurance that whatever you're doing is okay.
You are okay.
LEE GARNER SENIOR: "It's 'Toasted'."
I get it