(soft music)
- [Narrator] Hey Psych2Goers,
and welcome back to another video,
thank you so much.
Your love and support has enabled us
to send our way another wealth
of everyday psychology, so let's explore.
Have you ever tried to help people
who only ended up hurting you in the end?
All too often, you try to change the ones you love
because you think you see the good in them,
that they can't see in themselves.
We make the mistake of assuming
that everyone wants to be better
and grow beyond where they are.
But trying to help someone
who can't even help themselves,
can feel a lot like taking one step forward
and two 10 steps back.
Some people just don't change
especially if they don't want to.
To help you identify them, here are seven
common types of people, you can't help.
Before we begin we would like to mention
that this video is for educational purposes only.
It's not intended to target or shame anyone
but to help everyone
be more aware of our tendencies.
If you find yourself relating
to the points we mention,
remember that admitting our faults
is the first step to correcting
these self-defeating behaviors.
Number one, victim-minded people.
Do you know what it means
to have a victim mindset
or to always be playing the victim?
Have you ever come across
those perpetual naysayers,
who are always looking to make excuses
for their own bad behavior?
And this is what we call those
who are forever pinning
the blame on everyone but themselves,
especially when things go wrong.
They lack the emotional maturity
to own up to their mistakes
and hold themselves accountable.
Their own choices and actions
have led them to where they are now
but, they refuse to see it.
So no matter how hard you try
they're never going to change
because in their eyes, nothing is ever their fault.
Number two, self-righteous people.
Narcissistic, egocentric,
and sanctimonious have your pick.
Such self-righteous people are know-it-alls.
They will they think they are perfect
and have nothing at all to change
or improve about themselves.
Well, good for them.
In fact most of them even think
its everyone else who needs to step up
and get get better, not them.
If only they knew.
Their pride and closed-mindedness
leads to their defensive and condescending attitudes.
Every time you even try to point out
their flaws or their shortcomings,
their severe unwillingness to change
comes form deep down inside where they are afraid
to confront their own insecurities
and see themselves as anything less than perfect.
Number three, deceptive people.
Dishonesty and deception,
the greatest evil for nay relationship, right.
Often charming and persuasive,
especially when they need something from you.
Deceptive people cannot be trusted
because they act one way in public
and another in private.
They are two-faced and manipulative.
They tell you lies, cheat you,
and even trick you into siding with them.
Alas, you end up doing favors for them
or giving in to their demands
without even realizing it, oh boy.
So next time your gut tells you
someone asking for help can't be trusted,
it's important to be sure of their intentions
before you lend them a hand.
Number four, desperate people.
Ruthless, cunning and opportunistic.
Call it what you want.
A desperate person moves you to pity them
and begs you for help,
but be aware don't fall for it.
These kinds of people are willing to do
anything and everything just to get what they want.
Even if it means stabbing you in the back.
They don't respect your boundaries
rather they abuse your generosity, time, and energy.
The worst part is they're always asking for favors
but never paying you back.
And they have no problem
using your good nature against you.
So instead of wasting your time
trying to help someone like this
staying as far away as you can
is probably the way to go.
Number five, disloyal people.
Are they quick to get angry at you
over the littlest things
or maybe they pick fights with you over nothing?
Some people are just too disloyal for you to help.
Though you may think that they are your friends
the truth is, you don't want
someone disloyal in your life.
They'll take other people sides over yours
or talk about you behind your back.
They're unwilling to change and be better
because they don't really care
about you enough to try.
They're more likely to lose interest in you
and move on to something else
rather than own up to their faults
and learn from them.
Number six, doubtful people.
You might as well try moving a wall,
because it's that useless
trying to help such people.
Difficult to understand and accommodate.
They're skeptical of everyone
and everything good that comes their way.
They're distrustful, pessimistic,
harsh, and judgemental.
And they never go along with any
of your positivity, gratitude, or optimism
because they'd rather sulk and criticize everything.
And the worst part is, it probably won't be long
before you start acting the same way too.
Because if you get too close to people like this
they could end up getting in your head
and filling you with doubt as well.
Number seven, quitters.
Finally, but perhaps most importantly
if you have someone in your life
who's a notorious quitter
you're better off staying away from them
than trying to change them.
Whether it's a relationship,
a career, or a personal goal.
They can't commit to anything to save their life.
No amount of kindness, generosity, or encouragement
will get them to change their ways
because they're so stuck in their loser mentality.
They think that whatever they'll do,
they'll either fail or need to work hard to succeed.
So they'd rather quit where they're at
than try in the first place.
They're flaky, inconsistent, unmotivated
and usually just good at the beginning.
It just isn't right, giving your all for someone
who isn't even willing to put themselves out there.
So if they themselves aren't willing
to change their ways and be better,
then holding on to them will only leave you
hurt, frustrated, and emotionally drained.
And life is too precious
to waste in the wrong company.
We hope we were able to give you insight
into some of the ways
that you might be wasting your time and energy
trying to help certain kinds of people.
Do any of these describe your experience
or did any of these points describe you?
Leave a comment down below
about your encounters with them if you'd like.
Please feel free to share
any thoughts you have as well.
If you found this video helpful
be suer to hit the like button and share
with those out there still battling.
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Thanks for watching, we'll see you next time.