and make these debut in dictionary
corner this week a true legend of the
silver screen Sean Bean good evening
bastards bastards bastards
Rocinha if you got a mascot yes I do
have a mascot I've got a pizza so here's
your mascot yes my mascot Jimmy Goodwin
up okay I'm not lucky on this show and I
bought all my mascots in so I've just
brought in comfort food to get me
through it I brought in a cake there's
another part of my mascot can we see how
far you get through the pizza and the
cake during the show I may not finish
the flake advert
[Music]
I'll put this down now no eat it
[Laughter]
it comes Jimmy the feeder
have you got a mascot this week John
well a lot of people have like lucky
pants and I've never I don't consider
anything that's touched my penis to be
that lucky what I've gone for this week
is a sort of a distraction technique so
shall be playing a character this week
that world wealth intimidate Shaun and
drive several wild with sexual desire
John to me you don't like summing Elton
John's ordered encases a bit
got a pretty mouth kid you go you ain't
gonna be laughing so much in 30 seconds
time when I'm gonna get a six and you
gonna get a fast
Sarah you're on John steam last week
with the countdown kid yeah we're sure
on this evening what what do you think
well John didn't wear the hat last week
anyone so I think it's not a lucky charm
at all I don't think it can keep it up I
mean the accent it's lipstick so it
looks like a vagina lipsticks for did
you not know
countdown kid think that's ironic
because when you open your mouth
everybody else gets
[Applause]
sorry that wasn't me no I heard about
your drama
I bought Sean I guess so you've only
been the same team so when the up
portrait on the home from I'd rather go
up my Toblerone and bank or something to
get us just to keep the team morale high
and then Toblerone main whales Ford
ideal but we never get clearance and
time from Pope were on so and they
thought we were going to be
disrespectful about the brand that's
crazy
so you
yeah Tyrone Danny reason the Swiss made
chocolate right so we don't associate
the blood diamonds and nasty gold will
us what cylinders yes
he'll some backup mascots oh yeah I know
sure sure had a plane she want us for
your meat stall that off the Diablo deal
set Matt off so talk alone can want it a
long hard okay Richard take the ten and
square it actually and can you two bits
right okay and then I'd like you to
square the five for me please I like it
and then I'd like you to tie it at 25 by
the to the other two and you've got you
know
[Applause]
Rachel mind-blown that was amazing that
was proper maths and you haven't used
any that numbers twice thank you never
been done before it's groundbreaking
that's right those things can actually
be done no no it's just been done
despite Richards amazing maths no one
got any points there I just caught the
moment a rich and Rob have no points I'm
not even on their team but he just did
something wizard if you want a square
and cube things get a job in a
jelly factory make babies a weakness
come back there's ever be
no jelly factory mate
what things have been said
Rachel you must get recognized by fans
all the time do you ever wish you could
sort of fly under the radar my favorite
time of the year is when I just get to
go skiing and you haven't got do your
hair and makeup you haven't got to have
all that awkwardness just put your
helmet on but you snood on no makeup
it's great and actually I've brought my
skiing stuff with me I just met pretty
sure I would recognize you in skiing
gear so I've got a beard and a Viking
monks and this is kind of my look so
much more comfortable and it's warm and
you just don't have to have that awkward
social is that you is it not house house
Jimmy that's a challenging wank
[Applause]
sorry I'm sure you're a fine figure of a
man how do you stand such a remarkable
condition I mean I've got a tapeworm
that so that certainly helps I call him
Charlie they're gone Charlie that's for
you that's 12% of people in this country
have got tapeworm really which actually
makes them more popular than dogs how do
you get a tapeworm do you eat a worm and
off stage you get it off pork yeah yeah
always pork yeah
always a pork you get it off a bath pork
or not off anything else
another victory for the Kornberg and a
song about it if you are negated
tapeworm eat some pork tapeworm eat some
pork on a ham chicken beef fish or egg
forget it you won't get a tapeworm
there's Google if you get tapeworms with
pigs they catch some other pigs they eat
pork and then they get it they get it to
the pork pig there's the Big Bang
actually all the tapeworms flew into the
pigs some people say this version of
countdown is less intelligent short news
just in you can get tapeworms from beef
say one thing Google and go itself
my palms about so very important to me
it's about how come it's ok to name you
Willy but it's not ok to name the fellas
Willy next year at the urinals
so my poems called hanging about in a
trade station toilet name in people's
penises
how commuter on your way to work
I'm gonna call yours captain Birdseye
because it looks like he's wearing a
polo neck and winking at me
you're welcome I just named your penis
hello train driver who's just nipped him
for a piss
I'm gonna call yours mrs. ferns be my
old geography teacher because you're
smaller and wrinkly and have a birthmark
down the side of your shaft you're
welcome I just named your anus
[Laughter]
hello please hello
oh please officer
[Laughter]
Helen Cleese officer who's just been
sent to the toilets because they've had
reports of someone named yet
I'll arrest me for naming strangers
oh you can I didn't know that
oh great now I'm electronically talent
again
[Applause]